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When mommy goes off to war, it's rough on kids [sickening]
The Seattle Times ^ | 11/28/06 | Donna St. George

Posted on 11/29/2006 8:36:31 AM PST by XR7

HAVRE DE GRACE, Md. — When they called her name, she could not move. Sgt. Leana Nishimura intended to walk up proudly, shake the dignitaries' hands and accept their honors for her service in Iraq — a special coin, a lapel pin, a glass-encased U.S. flag.

But her son clung to her leg. He cried and held tight...T.J. was 9, her oldest child, and although eight months had passed since she had returned from the war zone, he was still upset by anything that reminded him of her deployment...

The faraway move to live with his grandmother. The months that went by without his mother's kisses or hugs, without her scrutiny of homework, her teasing humor, her familiar bedtime songs.

Nishimura was a single mother — with no spouse to take over, to preserve her children's routines, to keep up the family apartment.

Of her three children, T.J. seemed to worry most... "He went from having one parent to having no parents, basically," Nishimura said, reflecting. "People have said, 'Thank you so much for your sacrifice.' But it's the children who have had more of a sacrifice."

When war started in Iraq, a generation of U.S. women became involved as never before — in a wider-than-ever array of jobs, for long deployments, in a conflict with daily bloodshed. More than 155,000 women have served in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Among their ranks are more than 16,000 single mothers, according to the Pentagon, a number that military experts say is unprecedented.

How these women have coped and how their children are managing have gone little noticed as the war stretches across a fourth year...

"I tell [the children] that if God needs Mommy to go ... then Mommy's going to have to go again and they're going to have to let me."

(Excerpt) Read more at archives.seattletimes.nwsource.com ...


TOPICS: Editorial; Extended News; Foreign Affairs; News/Current Events; War on Terror
KEYWORDS: afghanistan; antimommy; armedforces; army; butch; childrem; children; chivalry; combat; dod; effeminate; effeminatemen; enduringfreedom; era; families; family; feminazis; feminism; femnistagenda; fightingmen; gayagenda; gi; girlieguys; girliemen; homosexualagenda; honor; iraq; jessica; jessicalynch; lesbians; lynch; marines; military; motherhood; nags; now; pansies; pentagon; plannedbarrenhood; radicalfeminists; soldier; soldiers; usarmy; veterans; vets; vetscor; war
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To: Wuli

No sweat. We all make the leap sometimes.


181 posted on 11/29/2006 10:50:32 AM PST by highball (Proud to announce the birth of little Highball, Junior - Feb. 7, 2006!)
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To: Last Laugh
If she did not like doing the WORK for the money, she should have stayed on public assistance and kept her LEGS CLOSED!

Pray, what wisdom do you have to impart to us that she was on 'public assistance'? She was married when she had the children. Do you have records on her past that would lead you to believe she spent her prior life on public assistance? Or are you just being a good 'conservative' and assuming based on name, race, etc.

Before Iraq, Nishimura had worked as a teacher and cheerleading coach at a Christian school in Prince George's County, Md.

Well another one that didn't read the article I see.....They don't let folks on 'public assistance' teach at Christian schools do they? Well so much for your theory....See if you can sling a little more mud why don't you on this good woman's name?

182 posted on 11/29/2006 10:54:22 AM PST by billbears (Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it. --Santayana)
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To: dmz

I agree with you 100%. Truth is - we do not know the circumstances of her life. For all we know - her husband could have been a casualty in the war. However, we do know that this fine lady is a courageous veteran who served us in Iraq and did so at the expense of her children. We owe her a debt of gratitude.

dmz wrote:
Single mother does not equal out-of-wedlock mother, ace.

My dad died in 1963. My mom became a single mother. It happens a lot.


183 posted on 11/29/2006 11:01:08 AM PST by martianna
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To: BeHoldAPaleHorse; rabidralph; highball; MikefromOhio
I suppose we should remember and be grateful that we are of more sound mind and certainly more socially adjusted than some of these bitter people expressing such nastiness on this thread.

It does boggle my mind that people can act this way. And do it regularly.

Sucks to be them. ;-)

184 posted on 11/29/2006 11:03:05 AM PST by Allegra (Can't Talk Now...I'm Busy Looking for That Civil War the Media Keeps Talking About)
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To: Antoninus
In the current situation, you've got two choices. Scale back your military operations or institute a draft.

In other words, you're saying that either we need to surrender the initiative--and, eventually, the war--to the enemy, or we need to return to the broken army of the 1960s, simply because you and people like you are singularly unwilling to enlist.

Filling the ranks with women is a short-term solution fraught with a host of long-term ills--including situations like what is described in this article.

OK, fine. So why aren't you doing your part to correct the problem?

185 posted on 11/29/2006 11:04:23 AM PST by BeHoldAPaleHorse (Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!)
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To: TWfromTEXAS
"You and the writer called he a single mom, not me, I can read. If this is not your position, than why that post on this thread?"

Again, my point is:

1)Widow=Widow

2)Divorcee=Divorcee

3)Single Mother=catch all phrase to cover the un-wed mothers to legitimize activities contrary to traditional values.

(The article, by the way, only states that the woman is divorced, but uses the "politically correct" term "single mother", which is a universal-cover-all-the-bases effort to give cover to un-wed mothers in its application)

The individual in this article elicits little sympathy for those who become "mothers" without the benfit of a marriage and a father in the marriage itself. This "career move" of unwed births is being given the blessing of acceptability in society today by coinage of such terms as "single mother", and that is undeniable.

186 posted on 11/29/2006 11:04:40 AM PST by traditional1
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To: traditional1

benfit = benefit


187 posted on 11/29/2006 11:05:51 AM PST by traditional1
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To: BeHoldAPaleHorse
My niece is one of those women that they're bad-mouthing. This here Vietnam veteran is getting a wee bit peevish.

They're small people who have to butt in and judge other people's lives in order to feel good about themselves.

We can be glad we don't have problems like that. These posters aren't good enough to lick your niece's boots, believe me.

188 posted on 11/29/2006 11:07:49 AM PST by Allegra (Can't Talk Now...I'm Busy Looking for That Civil War the Media Keeps Talking About)
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To: Allegra; BeHoldAPaleHorse; rabidralph; highball

Unfortunately this has been the trend for a long time. The election failure just put it all into focus.

People here (and other places) just don't think before they post. They don't realize that talking from behind a keyboard IS READ by those who could use such ammo, for lack of a better term, to paint all conservatives into this corner.


189 posted on 11/29/2006 11:08:03 AM PST by MikefromOhio (Prayers for my cousin Jeff and his family.)
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To: BeHoldAPaleHorse
My niece is one of those women that they're bad-mouthing. This here Vietnam veteran is getting a wee bit peevish.

My thanks to your niece for her service of our great country. Don't worry about these people, your niece is a better person than each and every one of them and, more importantly, THEY know it.
190 posted on 11/29/2006 11:09:28 AM PST by MikefromOhio (Prayers for my cousin Jeff and his family.)
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To: MikefromOhio
True. These bloviators give all of us conservatives a bad name.

I don't understand why FR tolerates it.

191 posted on 11/29/2006 11:10:34 AM PST by Allegra (Can't Talk Now...I'm Busy Looking for That Civil War the Media Keeps Talking About)
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To: Non-Sequitur
Delusional? No. I'm experienced. I served in the Navy almost all my adult life, active duty and reserve. I had the occasion to serve with women, command women, and be commanded by women. And I'd stack just about every one of them up against someone like you who hides behind his wife and kids and criticizes those who serve in his stead.

Look, let's cut through the anecdotal stuff and the personal insults. Answer this one question: If every woman in the US armed services was replaced by a man, would the military be stronger or weaker? Conversely, if every man in the armed services was replaced by a woman, would the military be stronger or weaker?

It takes a special person to serve in the military, a sense of dedication and duty that I've never found among those who couldn't be bothered to serve.

I don't disagree. I have profound respect for those who server honorably in the military. But to put service in the military above motherhood (or fatherhood) when it comes to the nobility of the calling is just incorrect. Without mothers, fathers, and intact families, the number of individuals willing to become soldiers, sailors, marines, etc. would dwindle. Indeed, it is dwindling.

My question for you is this: if you disdain those of us who didn't serve so much (the vast majority of your fellow countrymen, btw), then what exactly was your reason for serving? To protect a bunch of worthless cowards?

Sure I see the difference between men and women. But more importantly I see the difference between those who serve and you.

Yes, I'm detestable because I didn't serve and I think that single mothers should not be allowed to enlist. Got it.

Look, I know you all have had a rough time when it comes to critcism from every quarter--most of it undeserved. But the day civilians can't criticize the military fairly when necessary (eg. a case like this) will be a very scary day indeed.
192 posted on 11/29/2006 11:11:31 AM PST by Antoninus (When your party's platform is "Vote for US because THEY will be worse," prepare to lose.)
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To: MikefromOhio; BeHoldAPaleHorse
Don't worry about these people, your niece is a better person than each and every one of them and, more importantly, THEY know it.

And that's why THEY behave in such a socially maladjusted manner.

193 posted on 11/29/2006 11:12:36 AM PST by Allegra (Can't Talk Now...I'm Busy Looking for That Civil War the Media Keeps Talking About)
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To: Non-Sequitur; Antoninus
Delusional? No. I'm experienced. I served in the Navy almost all my adult life, active duty and reserve. I had the occasion to serve with women, command women, and be commanded by women. And I'd stack just about every one of them up against someone like you who hides behind his wife and kids and criticizes those who serve in his stead.

High five! And thank you for your service.

194 posted on 11/29/2006 11:15:48 AM PST by Allegra (Can't Talk Now...I'm Busy Looking for That Civil War the Media Keeps Talking About)
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To: BeHoldAPaleHorse
In other words, you're saying that either we need to surrender the initiative--and, eventually, the war--to the enemy, or we need to return to the broken army of the 1960s, simply because you and people like you are singularly unwilling to enlist.

The Grand Army of the Republic was a conscript army. As was the WWII military. If you're nation's strategy demands more manpower than you can generate via volunteers, then your only choices are to scale back or the draft.

OK, fine. So why aren't you doing your part to correct the problem?

I am doing my part. I'm raising children and supporting my family. I'm sorry you perceive that to be an inferior calling.
195 posted on 11/29/2006 11:21:00 AM PST by Antoninus (When your party's platform is "Vote for US because THEY will be worse," prepare to lose.)
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To: Antoninus
I am doing my part. I'm raising children and supporting my family.

So are a lot of the soldiers defending you--and many of them are women. You could replace one of those women. You choose not to, and rationalize your shirking your male duty as "doing your part."

I'm sorry you perceive that to be an inferior calling.

In my father's day, that line of excuse-making was called "malingering" or "dodging the colors." A lot of fathers went off to war in his day. A lot of them wound up being buried here and there in Europe. I'm sorry you perceive that to have been an inferior calling.

196 posted on 11/29/2006 11:28:01 AM PST by BeHoldAPaleHorse (Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!)
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To: BeHoldAPaleHorse
So are a lot of the soldiers defending you--and many of them are women. You could replace one of those women. You choose not to, and rationalize your shirking your male duty as "doing your part." In my father's day, that line of excuse-making was called "malingering" or "dodging the colors." A lot of fathers went off to war in his day. A lot of them wound up being buried here and there in Europe. I'm sorry you perceive that to have been an inferior calling.

In your father's day, there was a draft. And a Declaration of War. If drafted, I'd serve without thinking twice. In such a case, there really would be a "spot" for me to fill in the army that someone else would have to fill if I "malingered." But for a 35 year old man with 4 kids to enlist with no foreign army on our soil? Sorry, not going to happen. Your argument might have teeth if I was 18 with no children to raise and support.

And fatherhood is a superior calling to service in the military, though both are very noble vocations.
197 posted on 11/29/2006 11:39:44 AM PST by Antoninus (When your party's platform is "Vote for US because THEY will be worse," prepare to lose.)
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To: Antoninus
If every woman in the US armed services was replaced by a man, would the military be stronger or weaker? Conversely, if every man in the armed services was replaced by a woman, would the military be stronger or weaker?

I don't think you can answer that with a simple yes and no. The answer to both questions depends on the quality of the people you've banned from serving, and has to be that the military would be stronger in some areas and weaker in others.

I don't disagree. I have profound respect for those who server honorably in the military. But to put service in the military above motherhood (or fatherhood) when it comes to the nobility of the calling is just incorrect. Without mothers, fathers, and intact families, the number of individuals willing to become soldiers, sailors, marines, etc. would dwindle. Indeed, it is dwindling.

Hence the need to take advantage of all those who do choose to serve, regardless of gender, regadless of whether they are a parent or not. If women want to serve and can serve then let them serve.

My question for you is this: if you disdain those of us who didn't serve so much (the vast majority of your fellow countrymen, btw), then what exactly was your reason for serving? To protect a bunch of worthless cowards?

No. To protect your right to choose to be a worthless coward.

198 posted on 11/29/2006 11:43:22 AM PST by Non-Sequitur
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To: Antoninus
In your father's day, there was a draft.

And fathers were exempt. But in my father's day, we didn't have summer soldiers and sunshine patriots, either. They went out and enlisted.

If drafted, I'd serve without thinking twice.

And you'd never be drafted. Funny how that works.

But for a 35 year old man with 4 kids to enlist with no foreign army on our soil?

Now you're moving the goalposts even further, I see.

"I have not yet begun to fight, and I have no intention of ever doing so."

BTW, about your age...

My oldest grandson enlisted in the Marines this summer. I went to Parris Island for the graduation ceremony. The visitor center at Parris Island is named for a man who enlisted in the Marine Corps in 1942, at 50 years of age, with minor children dependents, completed boot camp, and proceeded to rack up an impressive combat record in some of the toughest fighting in the Pacific. And in 1942, 50 was pretty damn old.

I guess my father's and grandfather's generations were made of much sterner stuff than today's.

199 posted on 11/29/2006 11:50:16 AM PST by BeHoldAPaleHorse (Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!)
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To: linda_22003

I apologize; I did not read the article either before commenting, as it appeared that all the pertinent info. was presented in the excerpt.

But why could not the more descriptive term "divorced mother of three" have been used to better describe her situation? I do NOT mean to be overly judgmental; it's just that I've heard of several cases right in my own "circle" here where an unmarried girl just chooses to go on welfare instead of marrying the father; kind of like an "either/or" type choice? The concept of "family" just seems to be forgotten; no regard for whether a father is needed even seems to be considered.

The comments I made were probably based more on what I've seen around here lately than what was facing the woman in the article.


200 posted on 11/29/2006 11:50:53 AM PST by Joann37
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