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Al-gebran
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Posted on 08/06/2006 5:13:02 PM PDT by kralcmot

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney General Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Gonzales said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle.'"

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: algebra; bush; gonzales; kitties; math; ozone; sleepercell; troll
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To: humblegunner
That wasn't funny either.

You all need to stay clam.

21 posted on 08/06/2006 5:49:56 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: msnimje

That should be ZOT squared, to the n'th degree, the ultimate Zotfinity


22 posted on 08/06/2006 5:50:37 PM PDT by kralcmot (my tagline died with Terri)
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To: kralcmot
what is "a?"

A "?" is a punctuation mark placed at the end of a question.

23 posted on 08/06/2006 5:53:19 PM PDT by avg_freeper (Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga)
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To: kralcmot

The end of a Canadian sentence.


24 posted on 08/06/2006 5:54:59 PM PDT by rock58seg (A minority of Republican RINO's are making a majority of Republicans look like fools.)
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To: GW and Twins Pawpaw

he squared the circle over by the ok corral and was never heard from again


25 posted on 08/06/2006 5:55:26 PM PDT by kralcmot (my tagline died with Terri)
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To: humblegunner

"I was just a boy when the Al-gebran came to my village ..."
Now that's some acting!


26 posted on 08/06/2006 5:55:38 PM PDT by dynachrome ("Where am I? Where am I going? Why am I in a handbasket?")
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To: nopardons

"No, it isn't funny at all."

hmmmm, coming from nopardons that's a ringing endorsement


27 posted on 08/06/2006 5:56:02 PM PDT by FastCoyote
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To: cdbear

ping


28 posted on 08/06/2006 5:56:10 PM PDT by NerdDad (Aug 7, 1981, I married my soulmate, CDBEAR. 25 years and I'm still teenager-crazy in love with her.)
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To: kralcmot

You have to really worry most about the hard-line group within Al-Gebra, know as Al-Gorithm.


29 posted on 08/06/2006 5:56:38 PM PDT by expatpat
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To: nopardons

It is from "Team America, World Police"
and is darn funny!


30 posted on 08/06/2006 5:57:16 PM PDT by dynachrome ("Where am I? Where am I going? Why am I in a handbasket?")
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To: Grut
What is a what?

A what is = vholt * churrent

31 posted on 08/06/2006 5:57:24 PM PDT by avg_freeper (Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga)
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To: humblegunner

tried to wrap my turban around that but ran out of cloth


32 posted on 08/06/2006 5:57:43 PM PDT by kralcmot (my tagline died with Terri)
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To: expatpat

They are located in the hills aroundd Al-Uminium (use the Brit pronunciation) and Al-Efant.


33 posted on 08/06/2006 5:58:26 PM PDT by expatpat
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To: kralcmot
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Slide rule? Really?
34 posted on 08/06/2006 5:58:34 PM PDT by wintertime (Good ideas win! Why? Because people are not stupid.)
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To: FastCoyote

Oh that's just silly.


35 posted on 08/06/2006 6:00:17 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: dynachrome

Then it isn't even an original and it most certainly does NOT belong in the news section.


36 posted on 08/06/2006 6:01:09 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: GW and Twins Pawpaw
"What of Al-Gebra's wicked cousin, Cal-Culus? Any word on his capture?"

Though not truly knowledgeable of the subject ... I understand there is an on-ging investigation into the probability.

37 posted on 08/06/2006 6:02:21 PM PDT by knarf
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To: wintertime

"Slide rule? Really?"

no shi-ite....in under the ZOT. safe at the Dome of the Crock.


38 posted on 08/06/2006 6:02:35 PM PDT by kralcmot (my tagline died with Terri)
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To: nopardons

Whoops, I wan't very clear here. I was referring to humblegunner's post in #18.


39 posted on 08/06/2006 6:04:08 PM PDT by dynachrome ("Where am I? Where am I going? Why am I in a handbasket?")
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To: avg_freeper

"what is "a?"

A is A

signed, Ayn Rand.


40 posted on 08/06/2006 6:05:35 PM PDT by dynachrome ("Where am I? Where am I going? Why am I in a handbasket?")
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