Posted on 07/09/2006 4:46:07 PM PDT by John Jorsett
Very old Hollywood joke:
Starving beggar with tin cup: "I haven't eaten for three days."
Zsa Zsa Gabor: "Dahlink, I wish I had your will power."
Up-to-the-minute Hollywood joke, from Agence-France Presse:
"U.S. Stars Align In Anti-Iraq War Hunger Strike.
"Star Hollywood actor-activists including Sean Penn and Susan Sarandon and anti-war campaigners led by bereaved mother Cindy Sheehan plan to launch a hunger strike, demanding the immediate return of U.S. troops from Iraq.
"As Americans get set to fire up barbeques in patriotic celebration of U.S. Independence Day on July 4, anti-war protesters planned to savor a last meal outside the White House before embarking on a 'Troops Home Fast' at midnight
"Penn, Sarandon, novelist Alice Walker and actor Danny Glover will join a 'rolling' fast, a relay in which 2,700 activists pledge to refuse food for at least 24 hours, and then hand over to a comrade."
So Sean Penn is starving himself to death, but just for a day? Brilliant! If Gandhi had been that smart, he'd still have a movie career. Willie Nelson and Michael Moore are also among those participating in the "rolling fast," which in Michael's case will involve going without the roll. Greater love hath no man than to lay down his lunch for his friends.
(Excerpt) Read more at ocregister.com ...
These kinds of stunts haven't worked in 20 or more years, but these people don't seem to realize how outdated they are.
I have a new tagline.
"In the forthcoming James Bond movie, 007 is tossed into a tank of ravenous sharks, but they refuse to eat him and, in a savage indictment of Bush foreign policy, sip their mineral water in a desultory fashion for 20 minutes before calling for the check."
Bwahaha. Somewhere there's a producer frantically calling for a rewrite to work this into Casino Royale.
Seriously, just when I think celebrity activists can't get any funnier, in rolls the "rolling fast." I like the "gain weight gorge" idea myself. Because I doubt there's a single actor in Hollywood who cares about the Iraqi people more than fitting into their designer samples.
At least the Buddhist monks in Vietnam actually set themselves on fire. They didn't just light their left arm on fire one day and their right leg the next.
Bwah-hah-hah-hah!
Thank heaven for the alternate media!
Another great line: "Imagine if the flailing neocon warmongers had to explain to the American people why we were now down to one Dixie Chick."
I cannot imagine anything more pathetic than a 'rolling fast'. It screams, "We care - just not very much!"
Another gem
Michael Moore fasts for a week, twenty chickens and five cows live to fight another day.
Hah! I work with a couple of 300 pounders. Moore is closer to 400.
<< It just occurred to me that the war protesters of the 21st century are ineffective because they lack believability and humor. >>
And, don't forget, although they're not light on craven cowardice, they lack the other component part of the very real motivation that drove earlier generations of "war protestors, many of them to Canada:"
The draft.
Anyone have the author's email or contact info?
"In a first for the music industry, two feuding gangsta rappers died this morning before they could shoot each other. 2Frail 2Fire was felled by a massive heart attack as he attempted to lift his LadySmith 60LS. Ol' Cadaverous Bastard expired from malnutrition a few seconds later while enjoying a derogatory gloat about the ever-bonier butts of 2Frail 2Fire's ho's and bitches."
That really did make me laugh out loud and put a smile on my face.
Steyn nails it again!!
Best--Steyn--One-liner--Ever.
That is great and I agree a classic. He had so many good ones and zingers, I laughed out loud while alone drinking my coffee early this morning.
Of course as much as I dislike The Snake, I kind of like this one:
"America's greatest living war hero and simultaneous anti-war hero, John Kerry, pledged his own passionate support for the crusade of his celebrity friends: "I ordered the banana cream pie before I sent it back."
A FLUSH beats them both. :)
Brilliant.
Where's Rosie O'Doughnut?
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.