Posted on 05/14/2006 4:29:40 AM PDT by billorites
Dozens of otherwise strait-laced men and women live secret, “Big Love”-style polygamous lives right here in buttoned-down Beantown, the Herald found.
“Is it fun to have sex with several people? Sure. But that’s not the point,” said Tom Amoroso, 44, of Quincy, a physician and follower of the so-called polyamorous lifestyle, an anything-goes haven for sharing the love, where no primal urge goes unsatisfied.
It’s a menage-a-many, hedonistic labyrinth of “here comes the brides and grooms” - with each group inventing its own set of vows. They vary from casual lovers who date their lovers’ lovers to committed polygamous “families” such as the fictional Henrickson clan in the HBO Sunday night show “Big Love.”
Practitioners say interest in their polylifestyle has shot up recently, buoyed by the popularity of the show.
Many local participants remain in the closet, but they congregate weekly right in the heart of Somerville at the trendy Diesel Cafe in Davis Square. Membership has exploded with the group’s presence on the Internet, where they chat on sites such as polyboston.org, polyandproud.com and polymatchmaker.com.
Ron Hod, 40, of Woburn runs a family landscaping business and insists he’s no different than most folks, except for his dexterous libido.
“Three is the most people I’d be in a relationship with,” he said.
Hod hails from Israel, where he grew up among families living communally in every aspect but their bedrooms. He and his girlfriend now live polystyle.
“The funny thing is we’re both dating the same person - but separately,” Hod said, adding that the logistics can be problematic.
In polyspeak, that relationship is referred to as a “double-vee,” one of many terms in the polyamorous lexicon.
To solidify their unsanctioned sexual web, they often will form a limited liability partnership to purchase property as a group, said Robyn Task, 42, publisher of Boulder, Colo., based Loving More Magazine.
Task says she’s had more than 500 subscribers in the Bay State - in places such as Malden, Plymouth, Norwell, Ipswich, Worcester, Arlington, Peabody and Roxbury.
“Certainly, thousands of people are polyamorous in the state,” said Linda Marks, 47, a therapist who says she founded the Boston Area Sexuality and Spirituality Network, a refuge for locals with many loves.
But many hide their lifestyles and even stick with lists of “polyapproved professionals.”
Among them is Monique Noelle, a licensed psychologist practicing in Harvard Square who said she regularly counsels patients living the polyamorous lifestyle.
“It’s not a pathology,” she said. “They have similar issues as monogamous people, though at times they may be more complex.”
Amoroso said he’s outing himself to help legitimize this life of wandering libidos.
“It’s very much like it is to be in a relationship with one person, only multiplied several times,” he said.
Well there's a big surprise. Another bunch of perverts rationalizing bad behavior.
[quote]
"But many hide their lifestyles and even stick with lists of “polyapproved professionals.”
Among them is Monique Noelle, a licensed psychologist practicing in Harvard Square who said she regularly counsels patients living the polyamorous lifestyle.
“It’s not a pathology,” she said. “They have similar issues as monogamous people, though at times they may be more complex.”
[end quote]
This comment is very self-serving. Having intimate relations with more than one person is immediately different from having an exclusive intimate relation. Note that this professional even says so. But then, she says, this is a distinction without a difference. I do not agree. These people are inflicting incredible emotional harm on themselves and each other, not least because they are reducing sexual intimacy to the level of casual friendship. It was bad enough when it amounted to serial monogamy. But that kind of emotional fecklessness led to many divorces.
This won't do that, but then that will only be because it looks like these people aren't going to even get married. Their relations are defined too casually and will be conducted and terminated on the same basis.
There's little these people could do to make it 'All About Me' than this. And I feel very badly that they are going to deeply regret this as they get older.
It's all about socialism if it isn't stopped and contained than it will spread like wildfire. There are those who advocate socialism by not accepting reality they hide their heads in the sand and keep repeating everything is ok everything is ok they see no evil hear no evil and than go around and attack those of us who do see the future and are fighting for the very survival of the heart and soul of this country!
I don't care what they do so long as they don't bring babies into the mix.
All behaviors have consequences. Moral decay and societal breakdown could be the consequence of this behavior.
The reality doesn't live up to what people imagine the participants look like. You're bound to be disappointed (just as you would be with nudist camps) when you see them.
I do have a huge problem when they try to socially legitimize their bad behavior.
I read this article the same way in which I would look at a new bug the kids found. "wow, never seen that before, ok, I'm done, take it away...ewwww"
Word of advice: It's a lot cheaper and safer to buy a lifesize inflatable doll or a dildo, as the case may be.
Who cares what they do in the privacy of their own home?
Word of advice: It's a lot cheaper and safer to buy a lifesize inflatable doll or a dildo, as the case may be.
I bought both....and they ran away together.
I believe in privacy, I believe in limited government. This orgy redefined issue is now a societal issue because these people are now engaged on a publicity campaign.
I would not broadcast my personal life in a newspaper or on a webforum; it's MY life. But these people want (pun warning) more exposure. Well, give it to them, along with all the criticism that they deserve.
Stable families are the foundation of any healthy society.
Homosexual Rights are aimed at normalizing family structures which are inherently unstable.
Polygamous arrangements are being normalized in an effort to increase the instability of families.
Easy divorce, easy acceptance of children out of wedlock -- it's all aimed (deliberately) at removing the family as a stabilizing force in western society. Marx laid it all out 150 years ago. Gramsci made it crystal clear.
Who cares what they do in the privacy of their own home?
I do. You should.
When secular liberals in Boston do it, it's a healthy alternative lifestyle.
When breakway Mormon sectarians in Utah do it, it's a felony.
According to the article, it sounds as though the only thing shared in these "loving relationships" is the sex. I mean, you can dress up a pig but it's still a pig.
The rough vectoral calculus of who ,in a marriage, can expect and require marital allegiance and the keeping of one's word, is a matter of public concern ...as is the upholding of any other lawful contract. While Marriage is more than a contract, it is at least a contract. Anti-adultery laws should be enforced.
Why am I reading about it if it is a) private and b) done in their own home? Someone's shoving yet another sexual perversion in my face and demanding my acceptance (or, minimally, my silence).
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