Open Editorial: You Named Your Baby WHAT???

Onyx Magazine ^ | March, 2006 | Josephine Hammond

[beaversmom]

I was delivered by Doctor Slaughter and my mother lived.

My mom had a doctor Bledsoe for a tubal pregnancy. Huge guy with huge hands--made for a very painful examination she said. He new exactly what was wrong with her though when the military doctors were at a loss.

[AlanSC]

the book of J'Quann - great book. Best line from the episode -, "Please don't thump the book of J'Quann"

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

Diana is "Zaghaw" in African. (Yeah, right.)

Zaghawa is a tribe in Africa. I have never heard of the name Zaghaw.

[Xenalyte]

Not the "Ernest Goes to Camp" guy, no. That was Ernest P. Worrell.

[Vinnie]

Sherril was common boy's name also. ( probably several different spellings).
I knew one, I also knew a Courtney.

I'm not excited with girls named traditional boys names and that seems to be all the rage today.

[Christian4Bush]

And, no joke, I went to HS with a retarded girl named Pigg. Her idiot parents named her . . . Ima. I kid you not.

Did you go to Los Angeles Westchester?

[knittnmom]

Don't know about that, but I have a relative who pronounces "r" as "w", so has a son she calls Wonnie.

[Don Carlos]

A buddy of mine, last name Stone, joined the Corps in '57 or so, and made a career out of it! Any hoo, several years later, around' 67 or so, we were both home on leave and met up. He was a DI at Parris Island, a Staff Sergeant, and one tough looking Marine.

He told me about meeting the new recruit bus one day, and lining the newbys up and scaring hell out of em with his speech which included "My name is Sergeant Stone, and I am as tough as my name" blablabla, then going down the line of guys and demanding each of their names. He said he about lost it when one little twerp replied in a squeaky voice "Stonebreaker, sir".

[Xenalyte]

Not true. His name was Hogg, and he only had one daughter, Ima.

[Little Bill]

My dear ex was a Michele, true proof that the first kid can come at any time the next takes nine months, Polish proverb. Her Greatgrand mother complained, Misha, Misha, you name the kid after a mouse!

[pollyannaish]

I'm slightly frightened by the fact that Hair of the Dog and Newt were in the same post.

Will it cast a spell I need to worry about?

[Primetimedonna]

Many parents nowdays are picking one name, to be used for either a boy or a girl, like Hunter, Cameron, Tyler. Just sounds lazy to me!

[Polonius]

I recall a time a young woman got really cross with me because her name was LaShi’quita and I forgot to capitalize the ‘S’ and left the little accent mark off the first ‘i’ - how was I supposed to know? But lawd ha’mercy...what did I do THAT for? She was mad, hostile, and ready to FIGHT! It was a BIG ridiculously overblown embarassing ordeal (for her), and that’s OUR fault, parents.

That's happened to me a few times. When it comes right down to it, other people's ridiculous names are their own problem, and I really don't care. What does bother me are those occasions when someone with a bizarre name gives me attitude because I don't know how to pronounce or spell it. Sometimes it's hard to remain polite.

[dandelion]

Condoleezza is a musical notation. Italian for "with sweetness" (con dolcezza" And perfectly acceptable to anyone who knows their classical music! It shows that names really do affect us an inordinate amount - as witness by her classical music training.

One can overcome an "unusual" name, but the hurdles certainly can be difficult. Hence, nicknames for business use...

[jimfree]

Life ain't easy for a boy named Sue.

[ShadowAce]

I was given a goofy name at birth, not that bad, and had to spend close to 100 dollars to change it though probate court.

A guy goes into court to change his name. The judge asks him what his current name is.

"Richard Van Lesbian, sir."
"I can understand why you would want to change your name. What do you want to change it to?"
"Dick VanDyke, sir."

[Verginius Rufus]

There's a man named Ashley in Gone with the Wind...played in the movie version by a man whose first name was Leslie (if I rmember correctly).

[NYC Republican]

I taught a student on an indian reservation whose name was Sven....but he pronouced it seven.

Wasn't that a Seinfeld episode, where George came up with that wonderful name?

[livius]

If your name is Bruce or Lance, you are destined to shop at Pottery Barn and vacation in Mykonos.

LOL! Weirdly enough, I swear that every "Bruce" I have ever known has been gay. My apologies to any Bruces who may not be, but I've always wondered why there seemed to be such a strong correlation...

[null and void]

Jackson would be tolerable.

People would call the kid "Jack". Not bad.

"Ace", on the other hand, is stupid.