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Shallow Men And The Women Who Suffer (The Male Lust For The Supermodel Perfect Mate Alert)
Jerusalem Post ^ | Rabbi Shmueley Boteach

Posted on 03/18/2006 7:03:00 PM PST by goldstategop

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To: Victoria Delsoul
Now, now.

I at least put a litte smiley face on my comment...

...and I think you'd agree that a gentle jibe over spelling, done in good taste, is preferable to just being interested in ..."other things".

BTW, you might like reading a contemporary translation of The Wife of Bath's Tale from Chaucer's The Canterbury Tales...

Cheers!

481 posted on 03/20/2006 10:05:51 PM PST by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
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To: grey_whiskers
LOL, looks like you didn't enjoy my little joke.

Too bad, I thought it was funny.

Cheers and nighty night. Sweet dreams. :-)

482 posted on 03/20/2006 10:11:34 PM PST by Victoria Delsoul
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To: fire and forget

Quality, always find quality.

Lunch invite always open. Will send e-mails Monday prior to get a table count. Feel free to bring guest.


483 posted on 03/21/2006 6:05:35 AM PST by edcoil (Reality doesn't say much - doesn't need too)
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To: HitmanLV

The guys who get rejected after this routine aren't being rejected because they are perceived as 'real men,' though that may be a comforting thought. They come across as weak or needy men.

I don't see this as a "routine." If you really do love someone, you want them to be happy. You want to be around them.

What I see as the "routine" is the "treat them like dirt" deal so that they think you are a strong, masculine person.

I think my point is well made though by the emphasis that you put on the alleged weak stuff. That is how it comes across to a woman, pretty much period. They want a cave man.

parsy, who refuses to pretend to be mean just to get some loving.


484 posted on 03/21/2006 12:25:29 PM PST by parsifal ("Knock and ye shall receive!" (The Bible, somewhere.))
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To: parsifal

If you do love someone, of course you want them to be happy. And there is no reason to treat a woman like dirt, either, in order to be masculine.

A woman most likely than not can't be sexually excited by a man who she percieves as weak or needy. If a man presents himself as weak or needy

There is simply no need to be a caveman or a jerk. There is a whole range of conduct between being needy and being jerky. The best place for a man to be is between those poles, and that's where most women want a man to be, also.

Refusing to act like a jerk is fine, but if a man conducts himself in a way that a woman will percived (rightly or wrongly) as weak or needy, she will rightly reject him. Most women will reject him. That's a good thing.

The dirty truth is that most women don't reject men on shallow reasons, but on substantive ones.


485 posted on 03/21/2006 12:30:26 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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To: HitmanLV

A woman most likely than not can't be sexually excited by a man who she percieves as weak or needy. If a man presents himself as weak or needy.

Very true. That's what I'm geting at. And being nice, caring, and thoughtful comes across as being weak. Being a jerk or a caveman comes across as masculine and strong.

IMHO, real strength doesn't have to dress itself up and play pretend games. So, if I love someone, I'm going to tell them. If I love someone, I'm going to look after them to the best of my ability within the boundaries of the relationship. I ain't going to treat them like a piece of crap, even if that's what it takes to turn most of them on.

parsy, who has the strength to be himself.


486 posted on 03/21/2006 12:36:38 PM PST by parsifal ("Knock and ye shall receive!" (The Bible, somewhere.))
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To: parsifal

Good. My point is that it's not a choice between being a weak/needy guy and a crude/caveman.

The best place is between those two choices. If you limit the choice to between those two, it really is counterproductive.


487 posted on 03/21/2006 12:39:56 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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To: parsifal
IMHO, real strength doesn't have to dress itself up and play pretend games. So, if I love someone, I'm going to tell them. If I love someone, I'm going to look after them to the best of my ability within the boundaries of the relationship.

Another thing on this issue, while what you say is fine, if women don't respond to it in significant numbers, it's not a winning approach. Selling what women aren't buying isn't going to get a man anywhere worth going.

A big part of the problem is that many self described 'nice guys' aren't all that nice. They are quiet controllers, manipulators, and even worse. Women aren't dummies - they recognize that from their own past histories and just don't trust it. Many women quickly come to the conclusion that nobody worth knowing could possibly be genuinely all that nice.

That's not a mandate to be mean, though. But just talk to some women about the nice, sweet guys in their lives: they like having them around but they don't see them as sexual beings. A man who strips himself of his sexual instinct in an effort to be nice will not be rewarded for that beavior by a sexual response. It makes no sense at all for a man to expect it to, yet many many men continue on that strategy.

488 posted on 03/21/2006 5:42:52 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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To: HitmanLV

But just talk to some women about the nice, sweet guys in their lives: they like having them around but they don't see them as sexual beings. A man who strips himself of his sexual instinct in an effort to be nice will not be rewarded for that beavior by a sexual response. It makes no sense at all for a man to expect it to, yet many many men continue on that strategy.



You're the Tom Cruise character in Magnolia, right?


489 posted on 03/21/2006 5:44:59 PM PST by durasell (!)
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To: durasell

No, but if that's what he says, he is 100% right.


490 posted on 03/21/2006 5:45:57 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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To: HitmanLV

Similar, but a bit over the top. Probably the best performance Cruise ever turned in. If you haven't seen the movie, I suggest you do so. Though be warned, there is profanity.


491 posted on 03/21/2006 5:47:35 PM PST by durasell (!)
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To: durasell

I'm fairly clean mouthed but not a prude. I'll be sure and check it out! Thanks for the word! :-)


492 posted on 03/21/2006 5:48:47 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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Comment #493 Removed by Moderator

To: HitmanLV

Check out the cast:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0175880/fullcredits



You're right, by the way. Never try to con a woman. It'll only turn out badly.


494 posted on 03/21/2006 5:51:46 PM PST by durasell (!)
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To: durasell

Looks interesting - heck of a cast. Thanks! :-)


495 posted on 03/21/2006 6:39:21 PM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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To: edcoil

Thanks. I look forward to that.


496 posted on 03/21/2006 8:03:32 PM PST by fire and forget
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To: A CA Guy
What is her name, I will do some scientific research on the web and see if other pictures make her look different.

They do, especially the ones of her playing BB for the Aggies. Her name is Dnika Romero.

497 posted on 03/22/2006 8:11:18 PM PST by El Gato
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To: Dog Gone

Yup. Men are scum because women "have to buy the latest fashion..."

Bullcrap.


498 posted on 03/22/2006 8:13:37 PM PST by Philistone (Turning lead into gold...)
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To: goldstategop

Great looks shouldn't be a necessary factor, but anyone can at least try to stay fit, and I think it's totally reasonable for guys (at least fit guys) to make this an important criterion.


499 posted on 03/22/2006 8:24:12 PM PST by Young Scholar
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To: durasell
Beautiful women learn a couple of tricks to make themselves non-offensive to other women. One of those tricks is playing dumb and letting the plain janes be the center of attention at social gatherings.

Good observation. Happens on FR, too. ;)

500 posted on 03/22/2006 8:48:37 PM PST by Mr. Jeeves ("When the government is invasive, the people are wanting." -- Tao Te Ching)
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