A woman most likely than not can't be sexually excited by a man who she percieves as weak or needy. If a man presents himself as weak or needy.
Very true. That's what I'm geting at. And being nice, caring, and thoughtful comes across as being weak. Being a jerk or a caveman comes across as masculine and strong.
IMHO, real strength doesn't have to dress itself up and play pretend games. So, if I love someone, I'm going to tell them. If I love someone, I'm going to look after them to the best of my ability within the boundaries of the relationship. I ain't going to treat them like a piece of crap, even if that's what it takes to turn most of them on.
parsy, who has the strength to be himself.
Good. My point is that it's not a choice between being a weak/needy guy and a crude/caveman.
The best place is between those two choices. If you limit the choice to between those two, it really is counterproductive.
Another thing on this issue, while what you say is fine, if women don't respond to it in significant numbers, it's not a winning approach. Selling what women aren't buying isn't going to get a man anywhere worth going.
A big part of the problem is that many self described 'nice guys' aren't all that nice. They are quiet controllers, manipulators, and even worse. Women aren't dummies - they recognize that from their own past histories and just don't trust it. Many women quickly come to the conclusion that nobody worth knowing could possibly be genuinely all that nice.
That's not a mandate to be mean, though. But just talk to some women about the nice, sweet guys in their lives: they like having them around but they don't see them as sexual beings. A man who strips himself of his sexual instinct in an effort to be nice will not be rewarded for that beavior by a sexual response. It makes no sense at all for a man to expect it to, yet many many men continue on that strategy.