Stingray: Conservative Christian News and Commentary
Posted on 03/17/2006 10:43:09 AM PST by DallasMike
This has to be the best news headline in years. San Antonio's WOAI has this to say about the excitement that happened last night near Seguin, Texas:
Watson told News 4 WOAI, "We believe the gate of the cattle trailer came open, and the cow, for lack of a better phrase spilled out onto the Interstate. It was pretty chaotic for a while."
Several cars hit some of the cows. One cow died. DPS troopers called for backup.
That's when one officer was nearly run down by a speeding truck, carrying two illegal immigrants inside.
Seguin Police were out looking for those illegal immigrants. They parked their cars in the hot grass, burning two of them including that brand new 2006 Crown Victoria. Watson said, "Well, all of a sudden, another officer who'd arrived on the scene, alerted the sergeant that there was a fire."
Everything inside was destroyed, including tens of thousands of dollars worth of equipment designed for the patrol cars.
For what it's worth, my dad lived in Seguin for a while as a child and several ancestors helped settle the area. I would not be too terribly surprised if some of the participants involved in this romp were relatives, albeit (hopefully) distant.
Stingray: Conservative Christian News and Commentary
I guess you just can't make this stuff up.
/johnny
Somehow I think the reporter meant that the grass got hot and combusted after making contact with some hot part of the cars. If not, that was sure some hot grass!
Headline alone is worth it!
Why'd you do that in my eye?
Gee, I'm glad that cows don't fly..........
I could say that Texas has been awful dry lately, and that would be true. However, I know this part of Texas and I have a sneaking suspicion that beer was somewhow involved. Just a hunch.
it is hard to see through the windshield wipers when following a cattle truck
The Arizona Highway Patrol were mystified when they came upon a pile of smoldering wreckage embedded in the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The metal debris resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it turned out to be the vaporized remains of an automobile. The make of the vehicle was unidentifiable at the scene.
The folks in the lab finally figured out what it was, and pieced together the events that led up to its demise.
It seems that a former Air Force sergeant had somehow got hold of a JATO (Jet Assisted Take-Off) unit. JATO units are solid fuel rockets used to give heavy military transport airplanes an extra push for take-off from short airfields.
Dried desert lakebeds are the location of choice for breaking the world ground vehicle speed record. The sergeant took the JATO unit into the Arizona desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. He attached the JATO unit to his car, jumped in, accelerated to a high speed, and fired off the rocket. The facts, as best as could be determined, are as follows:
The operator was driving a 1967 Chevy Impala. He ignited the JATO unit approximately 3.9 miles from the crash site. This was established by the location of a prominently scorched and melted strip of asphalt. The vehicle quickly reached a speed of between 250 and 300 mph and continued at that speed, under full power, for an additional 20-25 seconds. The soon-to-be pilot experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog-fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners.
The Chevy remained on the straight highway for approximately 2.6 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied the brakes, completely melting them, blowing the tires, and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface. The vehicle then became airborne for an additional 1.3 miles, impacted the cliff face at a height of 125 feet, and left a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock.
Most of the driver's remains were not recovered; however, small fragments of bone, teeth, and hair were extracted from the crater, and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.
Gotta love Les Nessman!
How much you wanna' bet that the hot grass may have been brought in by the illegal aliens? What with all the flying cows and such, Cheech was running scared and dropped his joint.
Stingray: Conservative Christian News and Commentary
And that small Mexican dog, the "chi-hooa-hooa."
"I know this part of Texas and I have a sneaking suspicion that beer was somewhow involved. Just a hunch."
Beer is always involved! That's a given! LOL!
Perhaps it will encourage him to get back into writing his column.
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