There is an effective...and truthful way to teach both without losing the element of magic.
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Posted on 12/23/2005 10:07:40 AM PST by TexasGreg
Grinchy remark sends kids home in tears By RORY SCHULER Staff Writer Lebanon Daily News
LICKDALE — Jamey Schaeffer stretched her mouth open wide, showing off a pair of twin gaps in her smile. With a mouthful of fingers, she said she has no interest in two front teeth for Christmas. Instead, she’d like a Barbie doll from Santa Claus — and Santa Claus only.
But a substitute music teacher almost came between the 6-year-old and a Christmas Eve spent dancing cheek to cheek with sugar plums.
Theresa Farrisi stood in for Schaeffer’s regular music teacher one day last week. One of her assignments was to read Clement C. Moore’s famous poem, “A Visit from Saint Nicholas” to a first-grade class at Lickdale Elementary School.
“The poem has great literary value, but it goes against my conscience to teach something which I know to be false to children, who are impressionable,” said Farrisi, 43, of Myerstown. “It’s a story. I taught it as a story. There’s no real person called Santa Claus living at the North Pole.”
Farrisi doesn’t believe in Santa Claus, and she doesn’t think anyone else should, either. She made her feelings clear to the classroom full of 6- and 7-year-olds, some of whom went home crying.
Schaeffer got off the school bus later that day, dragging her backpack in the mud, tears in her angry little eyes.
“She yelled at me, ‘Why did you lie?’” recalled Jamey’s mother, Elizabeth. “‘Why didn’t you tell me Santa Claus died?’”
Elizabeth Schaeffer said she was appalled by Farrisi’s bluntness.
“I had to call the school,” said Schaeffer, a part-time custodial employee for the school district who is on temporary leave after complications from her last child’s birth. “I had to do something.”
Meanwhile, Farrisi, who is well versed on the history of “Santa Claus” — the traditional and literary figure — clarified her comments.
“I did not tell the students Santa Claus was dead,” she explained. “I said there was a man named Nickolas of Myrna who died in 343 A.D., upon whom the Santa Claus myth (is based).”
On Monday night, Jamey started to recite Moore’s famous poem while sitting on a couch next to a freshly cut tree, trimmed in tinsel and topped with a golden star: “’Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house. No creatures stirred.”
She paused, looked up, and said that’s when the teacher interjected, just a few lines before the verse that announces the arrival of “a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.”
“The teacher stopped reading and told us no one comes down the chimney,” Jamey said, curling into a ball on the couch, bracing her chin on her knees, her voice shrinking away like melting ice cream. “She said our parents buy the presents, not Santa.”
Sharing in the belief of Santa Claus is a very special event in the Schaeffer home. Jamey’s the second youngest of five children. The three oldest have already grown up and left the family nest. Only Jamey and her 18-month-old sister, Amanda, remain.
Last year, Elizabeth Schaeffer recalled, Santa left a trail of boot prints in charred ashes from his feet-first landing in the fireplace. And this year, the family will continue their tradition of leaving him a plate of cookies, a tall glass of milk and a ripe, shaved carrot for Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer.
The Schaeffer family wasn’t the only one taken aback by Farrisi’s approach to Santa.
Tim and Beth Rittle said they found their 7-year-old daughter, Holly, in tears in the back seat of their car after they picked her up from school that day.
“All of a sudden, Holly just started crying,” Beth Rittle said. “She said she had a substitute in music class, and she told the class there’s no such thing as Santa Claus.”
Schaeffer and Rittle both called Northern Lebanon School District Superintendent Don L. Bell.
Since the issue involves personnel, Bell said Monday, there is little he can say about the incident, adding that it has not been determined if any disciplinary action is warranted against Farrisi.
Bell said he was aware that several parents have expressed concerns about the incident.
He also noted that the handling of Santa Claus isn’t covered in the school code.
“We do not have a Santa Claus policy,” he said. “It’s unfortunate, but I really can’t say anything about it.”
Farrisi said she considered approaching the school’s administration with her concerns about how to handle Santa Claus in class. Instead, she said, she decided to add a disclaimer to her lesson.
“Those same children are going to know someday that what their parents taught them is false,” she ex-plained. “There is no Santa Claus.”
Meanwhile, Elizabeth Schaeffer was carefully thinking about her next step. She decided to make a photocopy of editor Francis P. Church’s famous response to a little girl, who wrote to The New York Sun many decades ago, asking the same question Schaeffer’s daughter struggled with last week.
“I mailed (Farrisi) a copy of ‘Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus,’” she said, giggling with satisfaction. “I wish I could be there when she opens it.”
As for Jamey, in an attempt to reaffirm her spot on Santa’s nice list, she drew up a new letter in bright red magic marker, a message destined for the Santa she refuses to abandon.
“Dear Santa ... How is the North Pole?” she said, reading her letter loudly and proudly. “How is Mrs. Claus? You are Great. From Jamey.”
He'd better be - that's who I told the mailroom clerk to say dropped off the gift for a bummed out co-worker: "a big fat guy in a red suit". Yes, I had him lie for me. Oh darn.
If there were no Santa, who would we credit with anonymous gifts?
Somehow he just magically knows which chair or corner of the couch is for which kid. Of course, since he knows when we've been sleeping, and all the rest of it, he probably does know that too.
Santa Claus came out to freep the Code Pinks at Walter Reed last night - I'll ping you to the thread when it's up.
I know one other thing: his handwriting is JUST like my mother's!
Folks, just remember, Santa ain't got no Holy Spirit, and Rudolph didn't climb up on the cross. Donner and Blitzen didn't start the Church, and the Penetecost didn't happen to the elves.
If your kids are in danger of confusing Santa and God, you might want to rethink what and how often you are teaching them from the Bible.
In my home, there is no close call, because I don't lie to my kidsd about Santa. I don't even "pretend" that those gifts come from Santa.I don't even teach my kids that there "is" a Santa.
However, for the family with small children, I can very well see how it could be a problem like the poster alluded to.
"If your kids are in danger of confusing Santa and God, you might want to rethink what and how often you are teaching them from the Bible. "
Excellent. That's what I've been saying. Any parents who are serious about their religion will be examples to their children about what faith means. Parents know Santa is make-believe and will eventually tell their children so. They will NEVER do that with God. Why is this concept so difficult to grasp for some people? Millions of children have no trouble making the distinction.
Ridiculous. How many people give up their belief in God because their parents "lied" about Santa? The premise is foolish. When a teenager or an adult is having doubts about their faith, is anyone here seriously going to tell me that the shattering of the Santa Claus myth is a factor in the decision? Pull my other leg.
You are hypersensitive. I was affirming your parenting decisions and blasting this imbecile for imposing her selfish views on children about a subject she should not even be addressing. Read the darn story and shut up, music teacher!
Anyway, you can trace just about anything to pagan customs. And what is wrong with that? I'm Irish, so my ancesters were pagan, although more recently, totally Roman Catholic! We all know that December 25 has pagan origins as well, so why not forgo Christmas all together, lest we mix the sacred with the profane? It can be taken to ridiculous extremes. See the attack on Halloween by the very people who are combating the attack on Christmas!
We do participate in the tradition of Santa Claus. He represents the spirit of unselfish giving and in no way usurps the birthday of Christ. To the contrary, he is a beautiful way to give gifts in an unselfish fashion.
My children also get gifts in their shoes on St. Nicholas Day and we give three gifts to another family on Epiphany to commemorate the three wise men giving their gifts to the Christ child. We also participate in much charitable giving at the holidays and throughout the year. We are blessed to do so. But in all of this, we never lose focus on the One for whom the season is celebrated.
My son will be ten shortly. He is beginning to question and I'm sure he has snooped around for presents. He is on the verge of not believing. When it comes time to let him into the secret, we will make clear that although we help Santa out with getting and leaving the gifts, it is because we are giving as Santa so as not to make the focus on ourselves. Not "thanks Mom and Dad" but "thanks Santa" as an example of unselfish and anonymous giving. After all, are milk and cookies adequate thanks for the iPod and Roboraptor under the tree this year? Santa is the spirit of giving and when I found out, I didn't think my parents had lied, I was happy to help out for the younger kids and I "got" that he is the spirit of giving, if not a real person. No worries.
Anyway, you have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! Watch out for those pagans!
Have a joyous and Merry Christmas, Howlin! Your little grandbabies there will make it so.
There is an effective...and truthful way to teach both without losing the element of magic.
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Reminds me of when I asked my mom if Santa was real. She said, "he is real as long as you believe in him." Thanks for the memory.
I don't believe anyone who truly believes in God can lose that belief.
Can a child be confused by a parent who lies about a fictional character?
Certainly. It makes you not trust your parents.
if he is almost ten and he is in public school I wouldn't think he believes Santa is real.
Want an eye opener? Look up Dies Natalis Solis Invicti in an encyclopedia. There is a reason that many early settlers in Americans did not participate in the European "Christmas" customs - they understood the message was exactly the opposite of what they saw the Bible taught.
Amen, excellent post.
Are you sure about that?
He's not in public school.
Even so, he's at that certain age where he's likely figured it out but doesn't want to admit it. I'm okay with that.
When he was just two, he asked "why does Santa use the same wrapping paper as us?". That's when I commenced buying separate wrapping and tags for Santa
Magic and myths are not real, hence not truthful. Jesus said he was the Truth. There is no way to teach truth and magic and truth and myth together. I would like to hear all of these rationalizations of Santa truth be applied to the Stork baby bringer, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy.
"This woman should be fired for her insensitivity to the cultural traditions of Christians. She lacks the temperament to teach young children.Z"
They don't fire ayone for anything anymore in schools. There was a kid who came to school dressed as Hitler who gave a report (assigned) talking about how good Hitler was for Germany, how wonderful his plans were, etc. etc. He didn't even get a talking-to. Another kid wasn't even allowed to bring a squirt-gun to school for his report (you had to dress up) on a famous gun-fighter in American history (not a robber/crook, a lawman). I don't want to give much extra info because, you know, certain folks could get fired for complaining about this :)
Good for you. :-)
I was in the first grade back in the late 60's and I figured it out then. :-)
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