Posted on 11/08/2005 8:01:14 AM PST by TBP
Ok, so since I am married and don't have a uterus I can't possibly know the peak age of fertility of women? THat's interesting.
Go actually do some reading on fertility, you'll find out that whether you like it or not, its biologically true. Peak is about 24 for women.
Nah, to answer the title question, divorce [especially a REALLY MESSY divorce] is an incredibly good thing for the smug neighbors who get to assert their own superiority [moral and otherwise] at practically no cost to themselves. And since all [or almost all] of us are these very neighbors, what would we be doing then?
Maybe so as Brittney Spears and Paris Hilton are 24, are they responsible to be mother's at that age??? I don't think so, maybe 40 years ago 24 yr olds could handle that kind of responsibility but not in today's age. First many cannot even afford to move out of there parent's house.
Older parents make better parents IMHO.
I believe the peak of a woman's fertility is actually 27, and then it falls off very gradually until age 35, when the rate of loss begin to accelerate. A woman who wants 2-3 children does not have to get married by 24 (or 27) to do so.
Also: It seems like people especially males that no longer wish to be married don't divorce they just KILL there wives now a days. You have to say to yourself someone like Scott Peterson or the other one in Utah murdered there pregnant wives just because it's easier than to divorce..pretty pittiful...
Fertility has nothing to do with "maturity" you don't have to like it, but that's when women's fertility is at its peak. And the reason most 24 year olds today can't handle life frankly is because their parents didn't do a very good job raising them IMHO.
Personally, I'd rather see marriages harder to get *into*.
I'd rather it be harder to have children. Maybe a waiting period after marriage to see if it will last.
I never said she did. Just saying the truth, peak fertility is in the early to mid 20s.. they talk about a 7 year range from 20-27, but after talking to lots of fertility specialists, the real "PEAK" is not that 7 year range, but around the middle of it at age 24 for most women.
Personally it has no affect on me when a woman reaches her fertility peak I had a child at 22 and did not want anymore. As fas as parents not raising them right has nothing to do with how much it costs to live out on your own. All you can do is try your best with your kids and when they grow up they make there own decisions.
I had great parents but when I got a certain age I was gonna do what I wanted to do mistakes and all...
agreed...practice first with a pet
You are soooooo Correct...Good Post!
Last paragraph especially = perfect. Thanks for the post.
I don't know-on the one hand I think it's incredibly selfish for people with to divorce because "I'm bored" or "I need to find out who I really am"-there are other ways to deal with those issues without tearing a child's world apart.
On the other hand, I personally grew up hoping and praying that my parents would divorce. I would have been much better off if they had.
It's a tough one.
I feel for those who have gotten into bad marriages. God gave me a wonderful wife for 20 years then called her home.
Looking at my handsome sons just makes me more grateful for his gift. (Want beautiful children marry a beautiful woman.) It is disturbing that all good people cannot have the same happiness given me.
When I see one partner giving their all while the other does nothing but screw things up it is very disturbing. Not even Christ condemns all divorce in any case. Nor should one forget that marriages in ancient cultures were far different that those of today. Most of them were arranged and involved the respective families far more than those of today and these arrangements could lead to violence if one party was not pleased. Marriages were often as much political arrangements as anything and the feelings of the couple (particularly the woman) was not important.
God Bless ya! you have been a lucky man! I always say LOVE is overrated but in your case it was special!
Thank you. You sound very blessed. My wish is for at least twenty years, maybe fifty, but I'll take every day and cherish it more so because I have a sense of contrast.
My analogy is spot on.
Children are created by a mother and a father, and they need and want a mother and a father. Fear of the unknown has nothing to do with why kids don't want their parents to divorce. Its pure and fundamental, kids get it, even if their parents don't. They know they were made to have a father and a mother in their lives and there for them no matter what. Even OOW children who have never met their fathers KNOW THIS. To say kid's don't want divorce because they "fear the unknown" is absolute hogwash. Even adults, whos parents divorced, more often than not when ask will say they wished their parents had stayed married.... That's not the statement of someone fearing the unknown, but a fundamental and inalienable fact of the human experience. You can try to reason it away with platitudes, but it doesn't wash.
There is no doubt OOW children have problems, but you are naive if you think children of divorce don't have a lot of the same issues, even if it doesn't put them in jail they still have them. When that teenage girl winds up pregnant because she's doing anything for male attention... when the teenage boy rebels against his mother because she drove his dad off.. you think he's any less likely to have problems? When a kid is being exposed to whoever is their parents boy friends or girlfriends and all the extra nonsense that brings...
Children who lose a parent to death, particularly death after they are old enough to have some real understanding of it, are the least likely to have the problems of other children in a single parent (particularly mother) household. There is a reason for that too... Daddy's not home because he can't be.. not because he doesn't love me, need me, care for me, or because mommy's got a new boyfriend, or daddy's got a new girlfriend thats taking up all his time... etc etc etc. Kids get it, even if adults and parents may want to rationalize it away.
The fact remains when you have children, they are the focus, period. And often in divorce situations they are the last ones being thought of. Mom's mad and wants to hurt dad, because dad cheated... dad's pissed because mom took the kids and ran off... mom fights with dad every time they meet, Mom and Dad use kids as pawns in their power play and retribution attempts... Kids hear mom badmouth their father repeatatively, kids hear dad badmouth their mother repeatitively.... Kids become pawns of court battles that have little if anything to do with them, and the parents act like 2 year olds.
I have said repeatedly the ONLY reasons for divorce are real abuse and neglect, everything else is selfishness... I've said it MANY MANY TIMES on this thread, so spending a paragraph to repeat what I have already stated to be justifiable seems rather foolish.
You should read the Betty Broderick Story *A Woman Scorned*
they made a movie about it, see what she did to her kids,the fact this woman blew her ex husband and his wife away and now is spending her life in prison, ALL those kids have grown to be well adjusted adults.
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