Posted on 10/14/2005 10:20:29 AM PDT by add925
The good wife's guide
1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal(especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work weary people.
3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
5. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc and then run a dustcloth over the tables.
6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces(if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
8. Be happy to see him.
9. Greet him with a warm smile and shoe sincerity in your desire to please him.
10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first- remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
12. Your goal: Try to make sure your homeis a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
13. Dont greet him with complaints and problems.
14. Dont complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
17. Dont ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will alwaysexercise his will with fairness and truthfullness. You have no right to question him.
18. A good wife always knows her place.
(If what I just wrote makes you sad or angry,
Sheesh! There are days I'd get turned on just to know she even knew where the vacuum was...
******************
Heavens to Betsy. I couldn't agree more.
I'm a guy too, and my wife and I both abide by this one:
"After all, catering for his(her) comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction."
It feels good to go our of your way a little to take care of the other person. Not enough people treat each other with respect nowadays.
Actually, here is the 2005 version:
When he comes home from work:
1. Serve him with divorce papers.
2. Calmly call the cops ("Officer, he hit me." Wink. Wink.)
3. Calmly ask female (or dumb male) judge for restraining order to keep hubby away from you and children forever.
4. Steal hubby's house, all money and all property in divorce proceeding.
5. Calmly ask female (or dumb male) judge for sole custody.
6. Garnish Ex-hubby's future wages.
7. Shack up with hubby's best friend ("Elvis II").
8. Move to Tim-Buck-To with kids, cat, Ex-hubby's Elvis II and all Ex-hubby's money stuff.
9. Collect money from Ex-hubby until he files Chapter 7.
10. Marry hubby's best friend and do it all over again - to Elvis II.
11. Find Elvis III.. . . . .
12. Die at the age of 77.8.
DA740
Don't need any wives reading this one!!
Actually, here is the 2005 version:
When he comes home from work:
1. Serve him with divorce papers.
2. Calmly call the cops ("Officer, he hit me." Wink. Wink.)
3. Calmly ask female (or dumb male) judge for restraining order to keep hubby away from you and children forever.
4. Steal hubby's house, all money and all property in divorce proceeding.
5. Calmly ask female (or dumb male) judge for sole custody.
6. Garnish Ex-hubby's future wages.
7. Shack up with hubby's best friend ("Elvis II").
8. Move to Tim-Buck-To with kids, cat, Ex-hubby's Elvis II and all Ex-hubby's money stuff.
9. Collect money from Ex-hubby until he files Chapter 7.
10. Marry hubby's best friend and do it all over again - to Elvis II.
11. Find Elvis III.. . . . .
12. Die at the age of 77.8.
DA740
NOT laced with strychnine you mean?
The film was also the first film to use the word "gay" in reference to homosexuality. The line occurs when David (Cary Grant) cannot find clothes to wear after Susan (Katharine Hepburn) sends his clothes into town to be dry cleaned. He is forced to wear a negligee, making him look rather foolish. When asked why he is wearing such clothes he leaps in the air and exclaims "Because I just went gay all of a sudden"
It didn't enter popular parlance until the gay rights movement of the 1960s.
Sounds like me and my husband. I couldn't agree with you more. :)
WTF?
That was hysterical! Ooops, Freudian slip...
" Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, "
...or that he's in the wrong house, if you have no fireplace!
bump for later.........
And so what if dinner is a Tangwich?
;-)
Actually, between them, I guess I am treated awfully well....I owe them much more than I could ever repay
Ping the regular gals, too. You know, so we can hear the collective explosions.............
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