Squirrels go nuts on crack (addicts hide drugs in gardens; our furry friends dig it up)

The Sun (U.K.); ^ | October 7, 2005 | VIRGINIA WHEELER

[mmercier]

Seriously, the squirrels are suffering from distemper or rabies.

Likely the area has long since banned "cruel traps" used for animal control at local landfills. The rats go distemper or rabid and fight with the raccoons who venture into the suburban areas when the site gets capped. The squirrels and raccoons interact and the blood born disease transfers.

Wait till the peppy the house cat goes at it with a infected squirrel... I have seen this in person too many times. Then all the cat owners who outlawed "cruel traps" will scream to high heaven that something must be done to stop this outrage.

We did this in New England, killed off most of the raccoons via disease and are now watching same run through the skunk population. Rabies and distemper are now surging among house pets here, millions have and will continue to die.

When man alters the environment man must manage the alteration. You can not dump a hundred million cubic yards of food (garbage) and expect the natural balance to be maintained. Manage the alteration or accept infected animals, even in your yard or home.

[reagan_fanatic]

"I can quit anytime - honest!"

[dangus]

Look again. I never asked for an aluminum foil hat. Zheesh! (I mean, "Crimey!")

[mmercier]

>> Well, sometimes the Weekly World News accidentally swerves into the truth.

That may be true, but you can not seriously believe that a squirrel would eat crack cocaine.

That would be like my dog eating the cabbage I have out back.

Will not happen, can not happen and does not happen.

[Stoat]

You can not dump a hundred million cubic yards of food (garbage) and expect the natural balance to be maintained.

The same is true for a few grams of crack.....

[Stoat]

Will not happen, can not happen and does not happen.

Surely you can't be suggesting that Virginia Wheeler of The Sun is lying to us?

 

The horror of it all!  The horror!

[mmercier]

>> The same is true for a few grams of crack.....

I know and have known drug dealers. They don't leave anything where anyone can get at it, least of all a squirrel.

Assuming such was in fact plausible the scale of this phoneme indicates that most drug dealers are repeatedly burying their $hit that is eaten by squirrels and reburying more in a supposed safer place after the last stash got eaten...?

What a load of $hit this thread is, it is a blood born disease, the Britishers are nitwits, and I have seen dozens of cats, squirrels, skunks, opossum and chipmunks dying from distemper that exhibit peculiar behaviors. Good night to all and to all a good night.

[Stoat]

Good night to all and to all a good night.

Watch out for any crack-ho squirrels who might be lurking under the bed......

Thank you kindly for your gracious and congenial posts, and good night to you as well.

[Sisku Hanne]

I haven't been to th UK for nearly 20 years. But back then I was told they didn't have squirrels. Never saw one for the entire month.

[Graybeard58]

There's a squirrel in my neighborhood that I have turned into a democrat. I started giving him an occasional cookie, now any time he sees me he has his little paw held out.

[sweetliberty]

"How would one differentiate between a squirrel on crack versus one that is not on crack?"

To tell if a squirrel is on crack, be observant. If you notice any of the following signs, your squirrel could be on crack:

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1) He starts napping in odd places.

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2) He takes up playing an instrument.

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3) He seems to be picking up other bad habits

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4) He starts stealing candy from your kids.

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5) He appears to have delusions of grandeur.

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6) He becomes abnormally agressive.

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7) He starts soliciting your neighbors.

[Stoat]

I haven't been to th UK for nearly 20 years. But back then I was told they didn't have squirrels. Never saw one for the entire month.

A quick Google of the search keywords "British Squirrels" turned up these results:

British Garden Birds - Squirrels

Squirrels

When a grey squirrel first arrived in the garden it was a moment of great joy and entertainment.

 

Soon, however, it became a nuisance as it ate everything in sight, including a plastic bird feeder! The seed feeders made from polycarbonate and galvanised steel have so far proven to be squirrel resistant.

There are baffles available for fitting to bird table poles, but so far our solution is working, which is to place grease on the bird table pole. The squirrel has tried a few times to climb up the pole, but each time it finished back down at the bottom and gave up trying.

If simple strategies like these do not work, there are many food additives, feeders, and contraptions available for purchase that claim to prevent squirrels eating bird food.

Working for Wildlife Caring for Squirrels

(excerpt) :

:There are two types of squirrels seen in the British Isles."

 

Perhaps they are like the 'camp followers' of the Crusades, and only arrived when the druggies started hiding their stuff in gardens?  The mystery deepens.......

 

[Borax Queen]

OMG - ROTFLOLOLOL!

[Stoat]

There's a squirrel in my neighborhood that I have turned into a democrat. I started giving him an occasional cookie, now any time he sees me he has his little paw held out.

The EU has decreed that Great Britain must allow prison inmates ("lags") to vote in local and national elections.  If they similarly allow crack-ho (Dem) squirrels to vote, then the Dems will pose an insurmountable threat to humanity.  Vigilance is essential.

[Sender]

Crack squirrels are often armed with machine guns and rocket launchers bought at illegal gun shows. Bloody yanks. Frickin dope squirrels keep having flashbacks and hallucinations and the next thing you know, a whole city block is burning. Protect your nuts!

[punster]

It would seem the squirrels are beginning to act a bit squirrelly. :-)

[WIladyconservative]

I started giving him an occasional cookie, now any time he sees me he has his little paw held out.

I had the Hillary Clinton of squirrels at my old house. If I wasn't out to give peanuts, she would wrap her little claws around my window screen and bang on it until I came out. Pushy broad.

[Stoat]

[NoCmpromiz]

acorns...

[metmom]

How would one differentiate between a squirrel on crack versus one that is not on crack?


It'd be kind of hard to tell based on the way the ones I've seen act. Good thing I don't drink at the computer. LOLOLOLOL.