Behold the visage of the omnipotent Flying Spaghetti Monster
Posted on 09/07/2005 7:02:45 AM PDT by gobucks
Surfing the Internet last week, I had a revelation.
I stumbled onto the Web site for the Flying Spaghetti Monster and was simultaneously angered and inspired. His Noodly Appendage was clearly the creator of heaven and earth, but why had I heard nothing about Him from my public high school biology teachers? Why was I never told that Darwin might be wrong, and that I may have in fact been created by a higher being with meatballs for eyes?
For those of you who are entirely confused and considering writing letters to the editor insisting I be committed, I urge you to first take a look at the Wikipedia article on the Flying Spaghetti Monster, which reveals that Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is a "parody religion" created by University of Oregon physics student Bobby Henderson.
His new religion, whose followers believe that "the Universe was created by an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster" and that "all evidence pointing toward evolution was intentionally planted by this being," was created to challenge the recent assaults on teaching evolution made by advocates of intelligent design - the concept that humans are too complex to possibly have evolved from single-cell bacteria and therefore a higher being must have had a hand in our creation.
Several states, including my home state of Pennsylvania, are considering requiring public high schools to teach intelligent design alongside Darwin's theory of evolution in biology classes. In Kansas, the site of the famed Scopes trial of 1925, the school board is even trying to change the definition of the word "science" in its curricula to make teaching intelligent design easier.
Kansas' machinations were the ones that caught Henderson's attention and prompted the creation of his new religion. He wrote the school board an open letter requesting that if equal time were given to evolution and intelligent design, an equal amount of class time be spent teaching Flying Spaghetti Monsterism. He threatened the board with a lawsuit if they allowed intelligent design and refused to teach his new religion.
Henderson faces determined opposition.
Even President Bush has come out in support of teaching intelligent design, very carefully saying "both sides ought to be properly taught ... I think that part of the education is to expose people to different schools of thought."
I applaud Mr. Bush's general sentiment on this issue, however hypocritical it might be (I'd like to see him apply the same logic to sex education, for example, but that's another column for another day). But here, Bush's logic is flawed: Evolution is a scientific concept taught in science class, and intelligent design is not a scientific school of thought. There are most definitely disagreements within the scientific community - different schools of thought on, say, why dinosaurs no longer roam the Earth - but nowhere do you find any science class trying to teach that thunder is God's anger. Intelligent design is a faith-based concept that belongs in a religion or philosophy classes, as a school of thought contrary not to evolution but to creationism or other supernatural explanations for the existence of man.
By George Bush's logic, we should be teaching alchemy alongside chemistry, astrology alongside astronomy and magic alongside quantum mechanics. And we should be teaching the Flying Spaghetti Monster - or any other crazy idea - alongside evolution in our biology classes.
The state should not force public school children - or their teachers - to choose between science and religion in biology class. Darwin's theory is one of the most venerable in science, long established by rigorous inquiry and backed by libraries of empirical evidence. Intelligent design is an unscientific, unproven matter of faith that should be left to parents and families. Until the courts and state legislatures recognize this, though, I will remain an ardent Pastafarian, supporting His Noodly Appendage through whatever lawsuits may come to pass.
Ramen.
-The writer, a junior majoring in international affairs, is a Hatchet columnist.
I didn't know that Kansas had annexed Tennessee!! And he is majoring in international affairs? Bill Clinton would be PROUD!
---"By George Bush's logic, we should be teaching alchemy alongside chemistry, astrology alongside astronomy"---
Not quite, but we should probably do a better job of teaching geography, judging by your "article."
Lovingly yours,
TitansAFC - the biggest fan of the Titans in all of Chicago, Alberta Canada.
The New York Times story on Flying Spaghetti Monsterism was a classic, and truly funny. The picture illustrating it, Michaelangelo's creation of Adam, only instead of God there was a giant wad of spaghetti with meatballs for eyes, was truly amazing. I'm hoping everyone can keep their sense of humor here, because regardless of one's religious beliefs, this guy is really funny.
hoooboy.
I wish your headline was true but unfortunately it is not. Bill Clinton went to my Alma Mater, Georgetown University. He was a student at the School of Foreign Service. He was a student there when it was still a mens-only University.
It's bad enough to have the Buchanan Brigadiers pimping NYT Krugman economics in the first place.
May I suggest the author of the article take up a minor in History and Geography?
Let us also not forget the effect of 
Pirates on global warming,
the story of creation, 
,
the last supper, 
,
the Kansas museum of science, 
,
or the guy's page itself.
I don't know if I should laugh or be offended...but I see his point.
POSITIVE evidence does not include taking swipes at non-existent problems with evolution. The ID position does not win by default.
Now, I'll just wait here while you dig some up.
Junior,
I hope you are not holding your Holy Marinara Scented Breath.
After all, the FSM gave His Meatballs for your sins!
The problem with ID vs FSM is that they aren't conflicting theories.
Revelation 4:11Intelligent Design
See my profile for info
Obviously you haven't been touched by his noodly appendage. FSM is more complete in it's tenants than ID.
Ramen
Really? Is the rent that much more affordable, genius?
I'll spell that point out simply for you: it is pathetic that anyone on FR would cite the NYT party line as a source for an argument.
No it isn't. It means evidence to SUPPORT your position.
I'll spell that point out simply for you: it is pathetic that anyone on FR would cite the NYT party line as a source for an argument.
They may be liberal, but that doesn't mean they are automatically wrong.
Now, how about the evidence in SUPPORT of ID?
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