Posted on 08/24/2005 2:59:33 PM PDT by Crackingham
On a blustery day early this year, 13,000 people showed up at Mars Hill Bible Church in Grand Rapids, Mich., for what became known as "Porn Sunday." Two young California pastors with a website called XXXchurch.com - "the No. 1 Christian porn site" - were in town with a silence-breaking message. Their frank talk about the struggles many Christians are having with pornography has drawn huge crowds in several churches across the country, and now the Revs. Craig Gross and Mike Foster are planning National Porn Sunday for Oct. 9.
"We were tired of hearing stories about people's lives being wrecked, and feeling they had nowhere to go in the church to get help," says Mr. Gross. He and Mr. Foster hope to engage 200 churches in talking openly about "America's dirty little secret" and are offering resources to help them initiate healing programs for their congregations.
While some consider the pastors' efforts controversial, many religious leaders recognize they need help on how to talk about this "elephant in the pews." Surveys show that 40 million Americans regularly view Internet pornography, which accounts for $2.5 billion of the $12 billion US porn industry. Some 25 percent of search-engine requests are porn-related; 20 percent of men and 13 percent of women admit accessing porn at work.
For years, churches were in denial about the scope of the problem, but the toll on marriages, careers, and faith communities has grown, Christian leaders say. And it involves not only congregants, but pastors.
In a 2001 survey published in Leadership Journal, 37 percent of pastors said pornography was a struggle for them, and 51 percent admitted it was a temptation.
"For 25 years, I would have said that the pro-life issue is the most pressing threat to America morally, but pornography has overtaken it," says the Rev. Richard Land, a prominent leader in the Southern Baptist Convention, the largest US Protestant denomination. "More people's lives are being destroyed on a daily basis by addiction to pornography than through abortion."
Douglas Weiss, a counselor with divinity and psychology degrees, speaks at churches of many denominations on sexuality issues. "Wherever I am ... and no matter what the denomination, at least half of the men in the church admit to being sexually addicted," he says. Based on his experience, "The clergy don't differ that much from the general population - between a third to half."
I say then, walk in the spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lusts of the flesh. For the flesh lusteth against the spirit: and the spirit against the flesh; for these are contrary one to another: so that you do not the things that you would. But if you are led by the spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are fornication, uncleanness, immodesty, luxury, idolatry, witchcrafts, enmities, contentions, emulations, wraths, quarrels, dissensions, sects, envies, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like. Of the which I foretell you, as I have foretold to you, that they who do such things shall not obtain the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is, charity, joy, peace, patience, benignity, goodness, longanimity, Mildness, faith, modesty, continency, chastity. Against such there is no law. 24 And they that are Christ's, have crucified their flesh, with the vices and concupiscences. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
-Galatians 5: 16-25
Convicting, isn't it?
My suggestion is to get more involved in the congregation yourself, and not to dwell so much on the (lackluster) preaching. As I was pointing out to Mister Diddy, there's more reason for being in a congregation than simply that you like the preacher's preaching.
Very true...there is more to church than preaching...but I would argue it's one of those key foundation stones upon which a decent church is built. You can go without it, but not without a cost, sometimes a significant cost.
Preaching is the primary means not only of instruction, but of keeping everyone in unity, striving towards the shared goal of sanctification, and the immediate rewards that come from greater sanctification, like freedom from sinful tendencies, such as porn for instance.
Without strong, clear preaching, people simply go after there own notions about life and spirituality, and then you have a lot of opinions replacing a shared belief built upon the revelatory knowledge of God's Word. Yes, everyone can read the Bible for themselves, but not everyone is gifted in the interpretation of what they read. I have to agree with the Catholics that the Bible alone is NOT enough, that the church as an instution plays a signficant role is deciding how one should live according to the revelation of God's Word. In reality, the Protestants know this too, they just don't like to admit it.
Also, it is a FACT that every organization on earth, let alone the church, lives or dies based on the strength of it's leadership. Leadership positions have tremendous influence and authority, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not, and those orgranzations with gifted leadership will always outpace those similar organizations that have only mediocre leaders. In a church scenario, one can almost always judge the strength and skill of a pastor/preacher by his ability to communicate successfully with his congregation. And one can almost always discover the spiritual temperature of a church based on the quality and substance of the pastor's sermons.
Concerning greater involvment in the congregation: this is point that hits close to home with me, as my greatest desire has been to be as much involved in church as possible, especially in the areas of prayer and adult education/spiritual formation.
However, my church as little to no opportunities in either of those areas. There are no adult educational ministries what-so-ever, no discipleship programs, no nothing. There are occasional ad-hoc groups that get together to study a particular subject, but no without the stamp of approval given by the senior leadership, a stamp of approval that is rarely given. To anyone outside a very small group of leaders.
In terms of prayer groups: I was involved in one for years, and really enjoyed getting together to pray with others about a whole host of issues. But the church leadership closed down our prayer ministry years ago, and has not replaced it with anything else. The reason it was shut-down: too many activities in the church! It was the only open prayer meeting the church had.
Other than being an usher, or running the sound board, there really isn't anything for a man to do in our church!!!
Now the woman...that's another story entirely. They have a large range of ministries to choose from, including bible studies! But all this is strictly for women ONLY. Now you know why my wife likes it so much.
And while I am not accusing you of this, the ancient Christians (as represented by the early Church Fathers) regarded the attitude that "I'm not getting anything out of church attendance" as an indication of the spiritual sin of Sloth, the "noonday demon," wanting more out of the community than they are willing to put in, etc.
Both you and the Church Fathers are painting with a very, very BROAD brush! While you may not be accusing me of it, I'm very interested in your motives for even bringing it up...
The fastest growing segment in Christianity are the "unchurched" Christians. These are people who are just fed up with the politics, stupidity, and downright irrelevance of most modern day Christian churches, especially evangelical and charismatic congregations. These people are far from lazy, and love the LORD very much...the reason they leave church is that the enviornment has little to do with God and becomes either a "bless me" club or a "don't worry, be happy!" society. Almost always the blame for the sad state of many churches can be placed solely on the shoulders of the leadership, who in turn likes to blames the "laziness" of the congregations for their own ineffectiveness. I use to do a lot of research into this phenomena, as it really seemed to be the best indicator of how apostate many churches are slowly becoming.
This apostacy is a slow process, one fueled by the neglect and ego's of leadership over a period of years. The effect is like the old bromide about the frog in hot water...except in this case the spirtual temperature is decreasing in the congregation, and the people are slowly be taken down along with it. For many Christians, leaving the church entirely is their means of defending their faith, not abandoning it!!! It's sad but true that worst enemy to the church of Christ is the church itself, whether it be Catholic or Protestant. (Or, more specicificaly, the mediocre leadership of so many churches.)
One thing I really, really HATE about my church, and many others I've been exposed too is what I call the "blame the congregation" game they play. I just HATE IT when a pastor/teacher starts riding the congregation for their short-comings, laziness, praylessness, lack of tithing, [fill in the blank...]
Of course they don't lift a finger to help these people, as that would require WORK and INVOLVEMENT and SACRIFICE on their part, which might even cut into their sermon preperation time...
Then there are those who do get involved and do all those things, but won't let anyone else help them...then they get burned out and leave the minstry, usually after destroying their family in the process.
I've also seen several very good men leave the ministry in the past year, simply because it was not worth sacrificing their families for the tremendous burdens placed upon them by the senior leadership. Many of them don't want to even be involved in church anymore, as the experience left such a bitter taste in their mouth.
As for me, let me be very blunt: I will not invest in any company, church, ministry or organization that does not give me something in return, even if that something is nothing more than a warm fuzzy feeling in my gut. My home church doesn't even do that. Yet for my wife and kids, they get a warm fuzzy...so what is a man to do???
My wife fills out her spiritual "education" by listening to Moody radio and reading lots of Christian books. My kids go to Awanas sponsored by another church, so they know right from wrong, up from down, and the basics of the Faith. And for the most part, they all stay out of trouble.
But what worries me is our surrounding society...which is, much like many churches, quickly going down the big sink-hole of iniquity. If there was ever a need for a strong, bold, active church now is the time; but too many are being pulled into the gravitational orbit of the blackhole of American society...and most don't even have a clue as to what's happening.
That's why I'd like to be somewhere where the teaching and instruction is of good quality...because we desperately need it at this hour...
I'm no hlier-than-thou church-lady critic, but I really have got to wonder what the heck that means. Is Church just a social hour (or three) after all?
Actually at our church, it's about two and half.
Personally, I don't even find it to be that good of a social club.
So, you are not the spiritual leader of your home?
The command is "Forsake not the assembling of yourselves,"
Yes, and there are congregations all over the US and Europe who "assemble" in apostasy for a lack of faithful preaching of the Word. They "assemble" in lies and not the truth.
not for the sake of hearing the Word preached,
Take note of Paul's charge to Timothy as a young pastor of Christ's flock, and is an admonishment to all true Christians;
2 Timothy 4;
1 I charge you therefore before God and the Lord Jesus Christ, who will judge the living and the dead at[a] His appearing and His kingdom: 2 Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching. 3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; 4 and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.
Note the very first and foremost exhortation is to "preach the Word", then Paul gives the reason why.
5 but to "encourage one another" (Heb. 10:25)--in other words, because of the spiritual and social bonds forged in the congregation.
Community is certainly very important, and community flows out of everything I listed before, that you overlooked to pick out one aspect that apparently offends you.
How does one learn to "encourage one another? By the "preaching of the Word", is how.
How do believers develop "spiritual bonds"?
Through the preaching of the Word is how.
There is a reason Paul made preaching of the Word first and foremost. Because it is God speaking to you, and everything else flows from it. Hearing the Word has its place, and it is a high place at that, but it isn't the sole reason for church attendance, or the most important. A man can subsist spiritually in a congregation without a strong preacher, but the same cannot be said about the community of believers.
I attend the Reformed Presbyterian Church. I love it.
Good to meet you brother. PCA here.
So was my last girlfriend, who was VERY religious
God isn't looking for people who are "religious".
God is looking for people who will worship HIm in spirit and truth.
There will be plenty of religious folk in hell.
Religion and having an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ are very different things.
No lie. My daughter wanted to find the lyrics to the Christian song "I Get On My Knees" . I heard her say to her brother "Go to google and type in 'On My Knees'". I got to the computer in time.
I see you are ignorant of "predestination".
I think it's called "marriage."
I may be going out on a limb here, but is it possible some people don't get *enough* sexual stimulation?
Porn is adultery.
It's a fair question. I'd imagine that single men are at least as prone to the temptation, but its impacts are largely limited to themselves.
For married men, I suppose there's always a "grass is greener" temptation, and with the internet there's a no-effort way to indulge one's curiosity. It's a pernicious and seductive attraction that I suspect has little to do with how a guy feels about his wife.
Plus it's secret and at home, a very hidden addiction. I find it very interesting. I don't think a guy can look at those girls all the time and then not want a girl in real life just like her.
By george, I think you are onto something there. :-)
Absolutely correct about pornography, its a terrible danger.
We simply have to break the silence and talk about intimacy, sexuality, and the meaning of things from a Christian perspective. There are a lot of harried, tired, and stressed out people in our pews and many of them will reach for the quick "fix" of pornography to help fill the
hunger for true intimacy.
One of the interesting things about this time is that while the Church seems to be under assault on so many fronts the net result may be our own purification. God is letting the fire come to us so that we will be made holier and more like the Bride he wants us to be. One by one we are facing issues in our life together and they are getting exposed so that they can be healed. Pornography is no different and the faster we open this area up, let the fresh air in, and begin the healing, the better.
Being married does not mean that a person is experiencing intimcay and often the hunger for the same drives people to seek quick fixes like pornography and masturbation to fill the void.
We in the Church need to take the development and support of healhy marriages VERY seriously and often we don't. We also need to see how our buying in to a very corrupt vision of the American dream is killing us body and soul and take steps to live and love in a different way.
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