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Why I'm not a 'South Park Conservative', by Michelle Malkin
Townhall.com ^ | May 4, 2005 | Michelle Malkin

Posted on 05/04/2005 5:59:04 AM PDT by OESY

I'll get to First Lady Laura Bush's bawdy stand-up routine in a minute. But I want to highlight a related new book out about how young conservatives are shaking up the dominant liberal media culture. It's called "South Park Conservatives." My name is listed on the cover along with many other (mostly) right-leaning pundits, websites, and bloggers, but I must confess to having mixed feelings about the honor.

The best-selling book's author, Brian C. Anderson of the Manhattan Institute, writes a fun, breezy survey documenting the rise of talk radio, FOX News, the Internet, conservative publishing, and college Republican activism. Anderson's chapter on the success of conservative talk radio and the abysmal failure of liberal Air America to replicate it is incisive. Another chapter on the blogosphere (alone worth the price of the book) gives readers a useful history of the explosion of news, opinion, and political websites that have smashed the left-wing media monopoly.

But how did such a wide-ranging list of individuals and organizations -- Anderson's book cover includes the names of conservative-leaning Internet pioneer Matt Drudge and center-left journalist Mickey Kaus, the libertarian Tech Central Station, the culturally conservative WorldNetDaily, political upstart Arnold Schwarzenegger and political chameleon Andrew Sullivan, plus Ann Coulter, Laura Ingraham, and myself, along with a feature blurb from Jonah Goldberg -- all get lumped under the umbrella term "South Park Conservatives"?

Anderson argues that Comedy Central's cartoon series "South Park" embodies the "fiercely anti-liberal comedic spirit" of the "new media" from Kaus to Coulter. The cartoon, he writes, reflects a "post-liberal counterculture" that is "particularly appealing to the young, however much it might offend older conservatives."

Well, I'm 34 and no fan of "South Park." I have many good friends who are indeed huge boosters of the show, but I find that the characters' foul language overwhelms any entertainment I might otherwise derive from the show's occasional, right-leaning iconoclastic themes.

"South Park" may be "politically incorrect." But "politically incorrect" is not always a synonym for "conservative."

My discomfort with "South Park's" increasingly mainstream vulgarity is not a matter of nitpicking. We're not just talking about a stray curse word here or there. As liberal New York Times columnist Frank Rich points out, "South Park" "holds the record for the largest number of bleeped-out repetitions (162) of a single four-letter expletive in a single television half-hour." That's probably about the same number of profanities uttered at John Kerry's infamous New York City celebrity fundraiser last summer, which Republicans rightly condemned for its excessive obscenities.

Rich is wrong about most things, but he's painfully on target in noting the incongruous pandering now taking place by some in the cool-kids clique on the Right. Conservatives criticize Hollywood relentlessly, but as Rich notes, "the embarrassing reality is that they want to be hip, too."

Which brings me to Mrs. Bush. She demonstrated at the celebrity-studded White House Correspondents' Dinner this weekend that you can entertain without being profane. Most of her humor was just right: Edgy but not over the edge. But her off-color stripper and horse jokes crossed the line. Can you blame Howard Stern for feeling peeved and perplexed? And let's face it: If Teresa ("I'm cheeky!") Heinz Kerry had delivered Mrs. Bush's First Lady Gone Mildly Wild routine, social conservative pundits would be up in arms over her bad taste and lack of dignity.

The First Lady resorting to horse masturbation jokes is not much better than Whoopi Goldberg trafficking in dumb puns on the Bush family name. It was wholly unnecessary.

Self-censorship is a conservative value. In a brilliant commencement speech at Hillsdale College last year, Heritage Foundation president Ed Feulner called on his audience to resist the coarsened rhetoric of our time: "If we are to prevail as a free, self-governing people, we must first govern our tongues and our pens. Restoring civility to public discourse is not an option. It is a necessity."

Lighten up, you say? No thanks. I'd rather be a G-rated conservative who can only make my kids giggle than a "South Park"/"Desperate Housewives" conservative whose goal is getting Richard Gere and Jane Fonda to snicker. Giving the Hollyweird Left the last laugh is not my idea of success.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: 1anationaldisgrace; 1classymichelle; 1henpeckedgwb; 1laurawhitetrash; 1malkinrocks; 1pickalittle; 1pottymouthlaura; 2peckalittle; 3cheepcheepcheep; 4peckalot; 5pickalittlemore; briananderson; churchladies; comedycentral; conservatives; coulditbesatan; coulterwannabe; hititpearl; isntthatspecial; itsafrickinjoke; iwannabeann; laurabush; lauraisatexan; lightenupalready; malkin; malkinstoptalkin; michellemalkin; nags; needssenseofhumor; pukimomolokai; puritanicalchic; shutupandhousewife; soboring; southpark; stickwithimmigration; stomoralizing; thisisgettingold; turass; uptight
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To: Rebelbase; Celtjew Libertarian
"Actually 30 years ago was 1975, by which time "Deep Throat" was a household phrase."

Not at my house.

You mean Watergate was never contemplated in your house?

Personally I think people should have some knowledge of politcal matters before voting

601 posted on 05/04/2005 10:30:11 AM PDT by Oztrich Boy (Thank your God if your society celebrates tolerance at the expense of moral correctness)
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To: Howlin
It's about as good as the "What can I post, I don't have an original thought in my head" liquor.

I'll defer to your experience, since you are obviously in a position to make that comparison.

602 posted on 05/04/2005 10:30:14 AM PDT by Luddite Patent Counsel ("Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." - Groucho Marx)
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To: MamaB

Oh OUCH!

You poor thing!

My mom once locked herself out of the house.

Luckily, we had a "milk-chute".

I was skinny at the time, ( I was 4) so I got to crawl through and open the door from the inside.


603 posted on 05/04/2005 10:30:19 AM PDT by tiamat (Some days, it's not even worth chewing through the restraints.)
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To: Luddite Patent Counsel

You're right about that; I know talking points when I see them.


604 posted on 05/04/2005 10:32:45 AM PDT by Howlin (North Carolina, where beer kegs are registered and illegal aliens run free.)
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To: Oztrich Boy

Ah, I fell victim to my own argument!


605 posted on 05/04/2005 10:33:11 AM PDT by Rebelbase (The Republican Party is the France of politics--Lazamataz)
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To: dirtboy
If you disagree, perhaps you could offer up a counter argument isntead of just telling him to get over himself - as Celtjew Libertarian did quite nicely in post #402.

Always nice to get complimented from someone I'm disagreeing with. Thank you.

606 posted on 05/04/2005 10:33:50 AM PDT by Celtjew Libertarian (Shake Hands with the Serpent: Poetry by Charles Lipsig aka Celtjew http://books.lulu.com/lipsig)
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To: tiamat

You're welcome. And Thank you, too.


607 posted on 05/04/2005 10:34:11 AM PDT by Celtjew Libertarian (Shake Hands with the Serpent: Poetry by Charles Lipsig aka Celtjew http://books.lulu.com/lipsig)
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To: Celtjew Libertarian

Hungadunga, Hungadunga, Hungadunga and McCormick.

W.C. Fields in the Dentist.

May West "is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me"


608 posted on 05/04/2005 10:34:23 AM PDT by TASMANIANRED (Democrats haven't had a new idea since Karl Marx.)
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To: EveningStar

Hard as I try, I just can't torque my dander up over this issue. :)


609 posted on 05/04/2005 10:35:43 AM PDT by Constitution Day
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To: brushcop; Texas_Jarhead
Yeah, look at the crude, malicious cuts at MM by these "intelligent" folks on FR would you? One takes a stand to hopefully raise the bar in civil discourse and suddenly you're a "prude" (and that's the mild term) among other things.

OTOH clenched-anus moralists who declare 'Only a whore would behave like Laura Bush did' get a pass from a lot of people.

610 posted on 05/04/2005 10:36:22 AM PDT by Oztrich Boy (Thank your God if your society celebrates tolerance at the expense of moral correctness)
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To: shhrubbery!

I'm a her,
thankyouverymuch :)


611 posted on 05/04/2005 10:36:24 AM PDT by najida (Living in my house with just a power cord, a garden hose & a bucket; what else does a girl need ; ))
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To: MamaB
The world is coming to an end because of a horse/cow story that has been around for many, many years.

Oh my, yes. Every kid who grew up in rural America heard that one or a variation of it by the time they were 6. Maybe it's just that the joke went over the heads of the media, and apparently some here on FR as well.

There have been several disruptors here on FR raising their ugly heads and spewing insanity about the First Lady's roast. I believe many of them are either paid by the DNC or DUmmies, themselves.

612 posted on 05/04/2005 10:36:25 AM PDT by prairiebreeze (Hillary's Chappaquiddick. Check it out at: www.Hillcap.org)
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To: OESY
Well, I'm 34 and no fan of "South Park." I have many good friends who are indeed huge boosters of the show, but I find that the characters' foul language overwhelms any entertainment I might otherwise derive from the show's occasional, right-leaning iconoclastic themes.

Dear Michele,

Lighten the hell up! Not everyhting has to be all serious.---sincerely, comedy

613 posted on 05/04/2005 10:37:04 AM PDT by stuck_in_new_orleans
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To: Constitution Day

Ahhhhh......you said "torque!"


614 posted on 05/04/2005 10:37:16 AM PDT by Howlin (North Carolina, where beer kegs are registered and illegal aliens run free.)
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To: prairiebreeze

...or just plain old everyday dummies.


615 posted on 05/04/2005 10:37:36 AM PDT by bonfire (dwindler)
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To: itsahoot
As soon as Laura said it was a male horse the joke was about masturbating the horse

Its about grabbing a horse penis thinking its an udder, not some sick sex thing.

Its a shame your mind goes there. I grew up on a farm. We knew that thing was there and we knew what it was used for, but no one was stupid enough to try to grab it.. gees... get your a$$ kicked. Not without a pinch pen and a couple of beefy guys to help, but thats a different scene completely. And a horse or a bull will do it too. Kick your tail and make you completely sorry you ever got near there. But, thats what makes the joke funny.

616 posted on 05/04/2005 10:38:43 AM PDT by dalight
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To: TASMANIANRED

The scenes between Thelma Todd and Groucho in Monkey Business are some of the sexiest scenes I've seen in the movies.


617 posted on 05/04/2005 10:40:28 AM PDT by Celtjew Libertarian (Shake Hands with the Serpent: Poetry by Charles Lipsig aka Celtjew http://books.lulu.com/lipsig)
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To: flashbunny
Obviously you haven't seen the show in question.

Obviously you have no idea what you are talking about. I did see it. Saw part of the rerun, too.

I love how people comment on what strangers have and have not seen, based upon a few words on an internet forum.

618 posted on 05/04/2005 10:40:30 AM PDT by Skooz (Jesus Christ Set Me Free of Drug Addiction in 1985. Thank You, Lord.)
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To: Yossarian

ROFLMPJO !!!


619 posted on 05/04/2005 10:41:15 AM PDT by baseballmom
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To: Constitution Day
Hard as I try, I just can't torque my dander up over this issue. :)

One torqued my dander up. I need three trips to the chiropractor, before it stopped hurting. 8>)

620 posted on 05/04/2005 10:42:06 AM PDT by Celtjew Libertarian (Shake Hands with the Serpent: Poetry by Charles Lipsig aka Celtjew http://books.lulu.com/lipsig)
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