Wilbanks NOT Abducted

Sally Field made a couple of movies as a runaway bride -- Smoky and Bandit and one I liked with Henry Winkler (aka "the Fonz") called Heroes.

In the second movie, Sally Field's character board's a Greyhound bus in New York...

Heroes is some respects seems similar to this case...

--Do Not Curse -- Admin Moderator

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You're right, fraud is punishable. What fraud did she commit?

In a nutshell, to commit fraud, she would have had to make some representation. That representation would have had to be material; the person(s) she made the representation of the fraud to would have had to believed it and relied on it and been injured by it.

All right, let's think about her statement she was abducted. Now, this comes after the search and all the money is spent, and was obviously not relied on by anyone being arrested. (There were probably costs incurred in the investigation of three or four hours.)

But, so far as her leaving, that's not a fraud. As an adult, she has freedom of movement. She (or you or I or anyone over eighteen who's not legally incompetent) can walk away tomorrow.

Was it cruel? Yes. Inconsiderate? Yes. Criminal? No. We don't criminalize being inconsiderate, which is probably a good thing because the jails would be swamped.

In addition, take the argument she should be charged for leaving one step further. Imagine we start charging people who leave. What happens to the woman in an abusive relationship? We spent time looking for her when she vanished (possibly because of her safety), she should have left a note?

There was no indication from anyone who knew her that there was anything wrong. I would guess (and this is just a guess) she was confused about whether she wanted to get married and felt unable to stop the wedding. We may all see that it would have been so easy, but she did not. The stress of keeping these feelings submerged without talking to anyone about it must have finally gotten to her. I don't condone what she did, but I don't think it was criminal.

Oh well, she'll have a story to tell her grandkids.

Grandkids?

Boy are YOU an optimist.

Great idea!

She's an a$$hole just doesn't sound the same.

See my post above for link to this... (in red)

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I thought that, too. My first thought: attractive, wealthy white people...hmmm... sounds familiar: ratings!!

I couldn't help but wonder how many minorities disappeared that day, or on the days leading up to their weddings, and wonder of wonder, no media coverage. Let's face it, the media like attractive white people, otherwise you're not a story.

PS- I'm white and not into conspiracy theories!

she'd been planning her wedding since she was like 5...it's likely she built it up to gargantuan proportions in her mind.

I've heard of brides who bail at the last minute before. A family friend did this, and never married anyone after that. I wonder how much pressure was being heaped on her by her parents.

It occurred to me after I wrote this comment

I would guess (and this is just a guess) she was confused about whether she wanted to get married and felt unable to stop the wedding. We may all see that it would have been so easy, but she did not. The stress of keeping these feelings submerged without talking to anyone about it must have finally gotten to her.

that I could elaborate slightly.

I happen to know two women younger than her but both out of college. To read about them on paper or speak with them, they appear to be successful, bright, intelligent and completely together. They're both right at the tops of their class. They both seem just like anyone you would want to have as your coworker/daughter/wife. (This happens in men, too, btw, and I think more frequently, but the two I know are women.) One of them is an acquaintance/friend, another is a somewhat-close friend of mine.

Here's the thing: They are book-smart and emotion stupid. In fact, I don't think they can deal with their emotions, failure, or anything that deviates in any way from what they think is mapped out for them. Control is key to them, and so long as they control their environments and their standards, they are fine.

But when they can't.....watch out!!!! If you get in their way or don't hew the line, they are going to come at you with a vengeance. If there's a problem, it's clearly because you are not as smart, hardworking or ethical as them, and you risk eclipse from their universe.

But, I have discovered (with the one I am somewhat close with, as much as they will indicate they wish to get rid of you and that you are a bother to them), they do not actually wish to get rid of you. They need you there to witness and validate their accomplishments. If they can show how much better they are than you in a field of your particular expertise, all the better. To accomplish this, they will step right over what they have said without so much as a thought and say something directly inconsistent.

I believe both of these two people are headed for a major crash down the road. They will at some point be in a situation where they may not be the smartest or brightest, they will not be in control, they will be bested by someone they don't consider as good or as hardworking as them. I truly fear for their safety when that happens.

The pressure we, and others, put on ourselves can have terrible peril, and lead to great narcissisim.

Also, note that my statment of yesterday that the presumptive groom would have to be absolutely insane to submit to a polygraph test was right on the money. The police would have had him convicted in the media before this woman had picked up the phone. It was disgusting watching this guy get convicted on FR because of the way his eyes moved, or some such crap.

Bingo. And it's another reason why I'll never submit to one, God forbid I find myself in a situation like this. I once took a lie detector test for a job and apparently failed. I have no idea what happened or what question(s) were raised, but I know in my gut the whole process is not reliable.

I don't think it takes a conspiracy theory to figure out what media executives are thinking when they see a story like this one. I just wish Fox News would quit flashing their 'breaking news' screen every ten minutes even when the news broke four hours ago. That tone has lost all meaning to me now.

Wow, you're a tough one. Seems like there was a lot of pressure on this girl, with over 600 invited to this wedding. Why not cut her some slack until the facts are out?

Poor thing! An ostentatious wedding that could have paid off the third world debt, all her friends who traveled from far and near to be with her on her day and she goes on "vacation"? (Needed to find herself, did she?) Can you imagine the fear her family felt? The heartache? Her fiance became a suspect in a capital crime! Then, when she wants to come home, she makes up some lie ala Susan Smith about being abducted by Hispanics. Do you know how many peoples lives are ruined by people like this?

She may have done the only thing she was capable of given who she is but my compassion is not reserved for her.

It was disgusting watching this guy get convicted on FR because of the way his eyes moved, or some such crap.

I read some of that and wondered how people could get such strong opinions so quickly. I have no idea how I'd react if I was in the guy's shoes -- I'd probably look the wrong way and be convicted by the legal eagles on FR, too. There's one thing I do know: if the police started looking at me as a suspect, which they certainly would do in a case like this, I'd get a good lawyer. Anything you say or do, once in the legal world, can be taken out of context and used against you. I've seen it happen.