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BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- John Kerry relied on info from the ONION for his voter irregularities BS
Larry Elder show | 4-11-05 | dfu

Posted on 04/11/2005 3:17:52 PM PDT by doug from upland

This is just too good. Larry Elder was just talking about John Kerry and his whining claims of voter irregularities that cost him the election. After all, he just had to turn around 60,000 votes in Ohio and we would have a first lady telling people to shove it from the White House.

One of Kerry's claims is that messages were being given to DemocRAT voters that Republicans vote on Tuesday and RATS on Wednesday. Well, John, it was not a dirty trick. The info was satire and published in . . . . . . . . . . THE ONION!

Yes, Kerry is relying on a satirical piece to claim something that didn't happen. Good grief. We are so lucky that this idiot and traitor is not residing at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.


TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: fakemedals; gigolo; girlyman; idiot; kerry; kerrydefeat; larryelder; loser; nitwit; onion; terazyazketchupboy; traitor
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To: mcg1969
Wow, it's really unbelievable that people would fall for Billy the Burlap Boy too.

If John Kerry had been elected President, Billy the Burlap Boy would have gotten up and walked, I tell ya'! He woulda' walked!!

81 posted on 04/11/2005 5:27:39 PM PDT by Ghengis (Alexander was a wuss!)
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To: doug from upland

That joke was going around in 2000, and Al Franken closed one of his appearances on an evening news show last year by doing the same bit, only in reverse (with a straight but smirking face).


82 posted on 04/11/2005 5:35:58 PM PDT by Larry Lucido
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To: anniegetyourgun

Is it hugh too?


83 posted on 04/11/2005 5:40:05 PM PDT by Stellar Dendrite (a PROUD member of the "Blame the MSM first" crowd!!!!!)
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To: doug from upland

The "vote on different days" thing is a very old joke. I've heard it my whole life.


84 posted on 04/11/2005 5:42:22 PM PDT by Psycho_Bunny (“I know a great deal about the Middle East because I’ve been raising Arabian horses" Patrick Swazey)
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To: jigsaw

thxs


85 posted on 04/11/2005 5:51:49 PM PDT by tiredoflaundry (If you want to have a good time, you have to have a good watch!)
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To: Psycho_Bunny

John Kerry was too busy to have heard it. He was in Vietnam, you know.


86 posted on 04/11/2005 5:52:09 PM PDT by doug from upland (MOCKING DEMOCRATS 24/7 --- www.rightwingparodies.com)
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To: Serb5150

Onion ping ... check out post 49 ... )


87 posted on 04/11/2005 6:52:01 PM PDT by jwfiv
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To: doug from upland
John Kerry is one man S-E-V-E-R-E-L-Y in need of a "swirlie"!!
88 posted on 04/11/2005 6:55:17 PM PDT by soozla (XXOOXXOO)
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To: doug from upland

i can't believe that idiot communist sympathizer came as close as he did to taking the white house.


89 posted on 04/11/2005 6:58:43 PM PDT by tame (Frist and Cheney are WRONG--Tom Delay is RIGHT!)
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To: SupplySider

It is common behavior among socio-paths. They work so hard at telling their lies that they come to believe them as truths themselves. That is why they can be so convincing. After point they don't even know they are lying.


90 posted on 04/11/2005 6:58:59 PM PDT by ChildOfThe60s (If you can remember the 60's.....you weren't really there.)
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To: doug from upland; All

Is this for real???


91 posted on 04/11/2005 7:02:13 PM PDT by KevinDavis (Let the meek inherit the Earth, the rest of us will explore the stars!)
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To: KevinDavis

Yes. James Taranto wrote about it in OPINION JOURNAL, either yesterday or today. I am pretty sure that is the source used by Larry Elder.


92 posted on 04/11/2005 7:18:22 PM PDT by doug from upland (MOCKING DEMOCRATS 24/7 --- www.rightwingparodies.com)
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To: knarf; swordfish71
Great response, knarf, ROTFL!

Ping for SF71 see post this replies to, and all the rest...

93 posted on 04/11/2005 8:54:40 PM PDT by Former Dodger ("The high-minded man must care more for the truth than for what people think." --Aristotle)
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To: Former Dodger; knarf

OMG!

JFK served in 'NAM???????
Three PH's--what a HERO! (/sarcasm)

DAMN!

;-)


94 posted on 04/11/2005 9:24:26 PM PDT by swordfish71 (Proud of Fred Nerks being proud to be an Aussie! (Take that, Kiwis!))
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So.. people have been sending out these fake e-mails every election day for years and years, but the Onion stole the joke for an article, so Kerry must have used the Onion as his source?

It sounds more like he collected some examples of the fake e-mails and is trying to interpet them as devious tricks rather than stupid jokes. The Onion doesn't have anything to do with it.

Of course, if I were a Democrat I'd be pretty insulted that he thinks his voter base is stupid enough to fall for that kind of thing.


95 posted on 04/11/2005 11:00:51 PM PDT by Syllojism
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To: Syllojism





I remember news reports about flyers circulating in heavily Democrat-populated areas giving these wrong instructions about when to vote.


The fake flyers were also discouraging people who had traffic tickets or family members who were felons, and a variety of other things like that.


The Onion did run a satire piece where they posted a picture of a fake billboard telling Democrats to vote on Wednesday.


But Kerry was referring to the flyers that were found circulating, not the Onion article information.




96 posted on 04/12/2005 7:18:01 AM PDT by Mr. Mod
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To: doug from upland

Ketchupboy is just using the democRAT modus operandi -- repeat a lie often enough and BINGO! It becomes the truth!


97 posted on 04/12/2005 7:28:15 AM PDT by Polyxene (For where God built a church, there the Devil would also build a chapel - Martin Luther)
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To: Mr. Mod


I think the Onion and Jay Leno and a few others did gags about this story after the flyers were made public.

But Kerry was apparently referring to the source material, not the comedy routines that were borne out of the source material


98 posted on 04/12/2005 7:31:39 AM PDT by Mr. Mod
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To: Mr. Mod

Welcome to FR. I challenge John Forbes Kerry to produce a voter who was disappointed because he showed up at the polls on Wednesday. It is a typical non-issue put out by the RAT bastards to divide us by race and keep their base angry.


99 posted on 04/12/2005 9:24:38 AM PDT by doug from upland (MOCKING DEMOCRATS 24/7 --- www.rightwingparodies.com)
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To: doug from upland
Top Secret Report: How Bush Stole the Election!

January 5, 2005

(Washington DC) - The well lubed Democratic Machine is in full thrust. Millions of voters are set to march in Washington DC tomorrow to protest the certification of electors.  The other shoe has finally dropped and Bush's 2nd Inauguration may not happen.  The brilliant non-partisan Representative John Conyers, Jr., Ranking Democrat on the House Judiciary Committee has released the long-awaited Status Report Preserving Democracy:  What Went Wrong in Ohio.  This report weighing in at over 100 pages threatens to shake up Washington DC and rock the world with rock-solid evidence of how Bush stole Presidency for the second time.

Among the most damaging evidence from the report includes:

-While Republicans sat comfortably in their country club and had voting machines brought to them to cast their votes while eating caviar, Democrats had to fight the bitter cold and rain to go to their own polling place and some even had to wait in line to vote.

-Evil Hitler wannabe Uncle Tom partisan Bush supporter Secretary of State Blackwell actually insisted that voters be registered to vote, similar to tactics used by the Nazi's in the 1930's.

-Exit polling data which has never been wrong in the over 4 billion years the earth existed of roughly 1200 Ohioans did not match the actual vote of over 5.7 million voters.  Non-partisan Berkley statisticians calculated the odds of this happening approaching nearly a google-plex to one, which happens to be the odds of Richard Simons being straight.

-The Bush-controlled corporate monster Triad, who provided Ohio's corrupt voting machines, actually provided information to elections officials to assist them in their recount, thus insuring the recount would match their corrupt results.

-While the honest Democrat challengers randomly selected precincts with a perfect mix of all races and politely challenged voters without any partisan motives, the brown-shirt Bush supporters concentrated their vote challenge efforts in Democratic areas, and used their disruptive bigoted tactics to intimidate mostly in minority areas. 

-There were thousands and thousands of intimidated voters who were scared by these Gestapo tactics into not selecting either candidate for President.  These spoiled ballots alone could have given the real winner, the honorable war-hero patriotic Senator John F. Kerry, the election.

These numerous unexplained unprecedented highly-illegal irregularities are sufficient cause for both houses of Congress to reject Ohio's electors, thus giving John F. Kerry the majority of electoral votes cast and thus making him the President-elect.  Disregarding theses illegal Ohio electors, and ignoring the apparent vote of 5.7 million people is the only way to restore our Democracy and rebuild the lost confidence that everyone has with our corrupt voting process.  January 6, 2005 is set to be a historic day for America, perhaps even surpassing July 4, 1776.  Yes, help is on its way!
 


100 posted on 04/12/2005 9:28:43 AM PDT by Always Right
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