Why VERY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women

bullz-eye.com ^ | 04/07/05 | by: David DeAngelo, Author of "Double Your Dating"

[Concentrate]

True words never spoken. A vigilant eye will get rewarded. It shows that you care.

[BadAndy]

"See what you do is get her interested in a conversation,..."

Having a conversation with a woman is a waste of time unless you think it will get you la*d.

[brwnsuga]

I have yet to see a genius that looks like Brad Pitt, Denzel Washington or George Clooney... when that happens perhaps the smart guys will get some play.

[HitmanLV]

This topic comes up on FR about every 10-15 days or so - I am endlessly fascinated by the topic, mostly because I don't consider it a great mystery and yet so many men seem to have not thought out the mating game very well.

A shame - in 2005, there is no excuse for a man to consistently fail to attract appealing women.

[CanadianLibertarian]

Doubt this is true. Sure, many intelligent geeks fail with women, but it doesn't prove the thesis.

Maybe I'm biased; my IQ is in the 160-70 range. Prior to being married I probably "dated" (even if only for a night) 100+ women. So my personal viewpoint questions this idea of "I'm so smart that's why I have no luck with women" angle.

D'Angelo's stuff is ok, but for you single intelligent fellas try Mr. Ross Jeffries.

[Concentrate]

You must be on of those geniuses mentioned in the article, no?

[aculeus]

If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot,

If I were to buy a "how to" book it wouldn't be one riddled with redundancies.

[archy]

What the ladies are looking for is a good mixture of smart and cool. Thats what it all boils down to.

All generalities are untrue.

--Mark Twain.

But the third sister, who is also the youngest! Hush! Whisper whilst we talk of her!

Her kingdom is not large, or else no flesh should live; but within that kingdom all power is hers. Her head, turreted like that of Cybele, rises almost beyond the reach of sight. She droops not, and her eyes rising so high might be hidden by distance. But, being what they are, they cannot be hidden; through the treble veil of crepe which she wears, the fierce light of a blazing misery, that rests not for matins nor for vespers, for noon of day or noon of night, for ebbing or for flowing tide, may be read from the very ground.

She is the defier of God. She is also the mother of lunacies and the suggestress of suicides. Deep lie the roots of her power, but narrow is the nation she rules. For she can approach only those in whom a profound nature has been unheaved by central convulsions, in whom the heart trembles and the brain rocks under conspiracies of tempest from without and tempest from within. Madonna moves with uncertain steps, fast or slow, but still with tragic grace. Our Lady of Sighs creeps timidly and stealthily.

But this youngest sister moves with incalculable motions, bounding, and with a tiger's leaps; She carries no key, for though coming rarely amongst men, she storms all doors at which she is permitted to enter at all.

-- Thomas de Quincey, from Suspiria de Profundis

[Joe 6-pack]

"I thought your were going to say your HUGE number of blank lines."

Nope....it just took me a long time to think of the right word for "intellect."

[Shooter 2.5]

FR might as well start a dating service and be done with it.

[proud American in Canada]

" have always found intelligent men attractive, and am now engaged to one. I call my Common Tator the most intelligent man I've ever met."

What?!!! Is this another Freeper marriage!??!

Congratulations, both of you. And many wishes for a long and happy life together. :)

When I just exclaimed to my husband, "Oh my goodness, two Freepers are engaged," he said, "Well, now they'll argue about who gets the computer." ;)

All I can say is, I hope you have a registry at Best Buy. ;)

I'm happy for you!

[HitmanLV]

Yep.

[marsh2]

All the smart men that I know including the one that I look at in the mirror when I get up in the morning have their feet solldly planted in the nineteenth century. This is a problem because most women have their feet planted in the last half of the twentieth century as well as the century that we are all presently living in. This transcends the red state, blue state thingy. Smart men looking for women who have not progressed are going to have follow the telemarketers and look to outsource from Asia.

I was on an interview panel to select a department head. One of the candidates was a brilliant young man who promptly told us how brilliant he was. He spoke seven languages. He also mentioned that when he married his Russian wife, he spoke no Russian. My mind immediately said: "mail order bride." I concluded he didn't have the social skills to find an American wife and that this would make him a lousy Department Head.

[archy]

I'm a woman who has been attracted lately to "bad boys."

I'd suggest you avoid the ones from Miami, even if they did get a song written about them.

Bad boys, bad boys. Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you????'

[balrog666]

Just d@mn! I wish "The Naked Ape" had been around when I was young.

[Attention Surplus Disorder]

Exactly. This is a classic case of a solution in search of a problem. Most smart men I know are happily married and at the risk of sounding presumptous, I include myself among the smart men who are happily married.

Funny, your post struck me as proving the author's point precisely. Being happily married, aren't you presuming that you have or know or can say what generates or fosters those attributes that increase the success rate of those men who find themselves dating-challenged? I mean, that is the specific thing that this for-sale program claims to address. Being happily married, it seems to me that you are in exactly the opposite position of someone who is interested in changing their behavior to foster the meeting of suitable dating partners. Whether this program does an effective job of imparting or supplying that knowledge or information is something I know a buyer has an opportunity to evaluate for himself, as I know this offeror has a satisfaction guarantee.

I was speaking to a friend today about the notion that virtually everyone has some habit or activity pattern that they carry out at some markedly different competence level from most of their other activites. (Extreme example: idiot savant. Milder example: Doctors/dentists who make terrible investments. Accountants who can't balance their own checkbooks)

If this was a less charged issue than dating; supposedly leading to a relationship with a marriage partner of suitable stock etc etc; and the implied tie-up with individual morals and values....say, learning a foreign language..do you think you would have your objections to a scientific or methodical approach as this for-sale program claims for itself? Sure, the offeror is marketing a product and attempting to appeal to potential customers via "giveaways" or samples such as what was quoted in the original post. Ain't that the American way generally lauded in these parts? I have been the recipient of his e-mailings. Not having bought his program, I nevertheless find his approach and "samples" useful. One can pooh-pooh the whole notion of applying any sort of methodology to dating, but if the purpose of dating is to sort through a number of candidates in order to find the best potential life-partner [and...that's only ONE utility or outcome] then if you [generic you] are going to say "that only works with sluts or psychos" then IMO you are short circuiting the process. Frankly, in my experience you can't tell if they are sluts or psychos until you have spent some time with them, and you can't spend much time with them if you blow them off with ineffective behaviors. So I just don't see anything wrong with trying to correct ineffective behaviors if they happen to afflict you.

[Thinkin' Gal]

If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot,<<<

If I were to buy a "how to" book it wouldn't be one riddled with redundancies

Good point! Okay, I'll be charitable. Perhaps he was referring to real hands-on experience. That would be quite a feat.

[Arioch7]

No mystery though. Men and women think differently.

Some folks learn this but the vast majority do not. I am including women as well as men in my statement.

You're right, it is a shame. All it takes is a little bit of understanding. Most of the time, the task falls to the man to understand the women but if a relationship is to be a success, women must understand thier man as well.

I agree with you, but this problem has been around forever, LOL! What can you do?

Arioch7 out.

[muawiyah]

Old highschool buddy of mine who's now a Dean in an enormous State University used to say he liked motorcycles better than sex.

He's a really smart guy ~ the women flocked to him to prove that sex was better than any motorcycle ~ night an day!

Oh, yes, he had a motorcycle ~ with a worn seat.

Stupid women, FUR SHUR.

[Kirkwood]

"Maybe I'm biased; my IQ is in the 160-70 range. Prior to being married I probably "dated" (even if only for a night) 100+ women. So my personal viewpoint questions this idea of "I'm so smart that's why I have no luck with women" angle."

Egads.