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Truly, Madly, Guiltily (SHE LOVES HER HUSBAND MORE THAN HER CHILDREN)
The New York Times ^ | 3/27/05 | Ayelet Waldman

Posted on 03/30/2005 8:13:49 PM PST by paulat

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To: paulat
Hmmm...contrary to some people's opinions...I love this woman's take on things! This is as it should be, as far as I'm concerned!

I'm a guy, 40-something, married to the love of my life and my best buddy for almost 21 years. We've got a 19-year-old son, who is indeed the pride of our lives. But, I've got to tell you...as much as I love and have loved our son from the time he was born, I love his mom even more! She is truly the love of my life, and I'm pretty sure she'd say the same thing about me!

I'm also a pastor, and when I talk to couples who are planning to get married, I always, always tell them that their relationship with each other is the MOST IMPORTANT relationship next to their relationship with God. Always!

Call me crazy, I guess, but I'm saving this article on my home page!

21 posted on 03/30/2005 8:49:53 PM PST by Ulysses ("Most of us go through life thinking we're Superman. Superman goes through life being Clark Kent!")
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To: dbwz
I guess if you got married for the sole purpose of having kids, then you're going to find fault with this article.

...I wanted to hear what men thought about this....

22 posted on 03/30/2005 8:50:46 PM PST by paulat
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To: paulat

I'm not really sure what the problem with this is, other than that it's in the NYT and it isn't anyone else's business.

But not all women go passionately crazy over kids, even if they do love their own.

And quite frankly, I don't think it hurts the kids one bit if Mommy is passionately in love with Daddy. I wish more mothers remembered that the family is based on the relationship between the husband and a wife. Why should that passion and level of caring change just because there are kids?

I have always looked forward to being a wife and having a husband I feel this way about. I never really wanted children although I think I'd be a good mother. But I'm rather introverted, independent thinking-type and can only nurture so many people. If I do have children I will love them, but my man is still gonna be the one for me.


23 posted on 03/30/2005 8:51:56 PM PST by DameAutour
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To: paulat
Perhaps he just inspires more complete adoration than other husbands. He cooks, cleans, cares for the children at least 50 percent of the time.

Aw, I'm so touched. She loves her metrosexual boytoy like he's some kind of appliance. Nowhere in this entire self-absorbed panegyric does she mention one single thing that she does for him out of her great love and gratitude. It's all about what he does for HER, HER, HER.

What is she going to do when the kids grow up and move away, and he's a bald, wrinkled, potbellied old geezer with a weak weener who can't service her anymore? Is she going to buy herself a new one?

24 posted on 03/30/2005 8:52:16 PM PST by Alouette (Learned Mother of Zion)
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To: paulat
Well.

I have five kids.

I love God first, then my husband, then my kids.
But I love them all very differently.

The Love that I have for God is different than the love I have for my husband which is different than the love I have for my children.

I know that I am a good wife. Does that make me a bad mommy? I certianly don't think so.

I wonder why this author feels guilty about this.

25 posted on 03/30/2005 8:56:57 PM PST by It's me
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To: Interesting Times

"This can only be considered an improvement."

OK, I'll give you a solid 'maybe' on that!


26 posted on 03/30/2005 8:59:07 PM PST by jocon307 (We can try to understand the New York Times effect on man)
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To: It's me
I have five kids.

I love God first, then my husband, then my kids. But I love them all very differently.

The Love that I have for God is different than the love I have for my husband which is different than the love I have for my children.

I know that I am a good wife. Does that make me a bad mommy? I certianly don't think so.

I wonder why this author feels guilty about this.

BING..BING...BING!!! I think we have a winner!!!!

27 posted on 03/30/2005 9:00:46 PM PST by paulat
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To: paulat
...I wanted to hear what men thought about this....

You know, my late husband used to lament about how disposable men had become, what with a society that now encourages and celebrates single motherhood.

I'd be interested in hearing what the guys think about this as well. :-)

28 posted on 03/30/2005 9:02:59 PM PST by dbwz (2A Sister)
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To: BradyLS

You mixed your metaphors.

Don't confuse "No soup for you"

with

"If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."


29 posted on 03/30/2005 9:03:28 PM PST by George Smiley (This tagline deliberately targeted journalists.)
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To: paulat

Why thank you.


30 posted on 03/30/2005 9:04:50 PM PST by It's me
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To: paulat

Our children came before my hubby and he knew it. Now that they are grown, (5 of them) and moved out. He comes first now. And they know it.


31 posted on 03/30/2005 9:06:39 PM PST by processing please hold (Islam and Christianity do not mix ----9-11 taught us that)
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To: paulat

Is this what our society has come to? Are we really at the point where a major metropolitan newspaper prints a story about "putting out"? Are newspapers now considered "adult" entertainment? There was a day, not too long ago, when there were things that "couldn't be said in a family newspaper". It's no wonder circulation is dropping like a rock. The New York Times has taken the baton from "Penthouse Forum". Sad.


32 posted on 03/30/2005 9:08:13 PM PST by Luddite Patent Counsel ("Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." - Groucho Marx)
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To: Alouette
What is she going to do when the kids grow up and move away, and he's a bald, wrinkled, potbellied old geezer with a weak weener who can't service her anymore? Is she going to buy herself a new one?

EXACTLY! And I quote: "I could check my watch to see if I have time to stop at Good Vibrations to see if they have any exciting new toys. "

33 posted on 03/30/2005 9:09:12 PM PST by jamaly
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To: Ulysses
"Call me crazy, I guess, but I'm saving this article on my home page!"

You're crazy.

34 posted on 03/30/2005 9:10:38 PM PST by Luddite Patent Counsel ("Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." - Groucho Marx)
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To: duck duck goose

When my (ex)husband left...he took the kids. Kids are home with me now...(ex)husband is STILL gone...LIFE IS GOOD!!!!


35 posted on 03/30/2005 9:10:39 PM PST by trussell (I am frowning today. God please save Terri, comfort her family. Grant them rest, and peace.)
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To: trussell

Ex-husband is clearly an idiot.


36 posted on 03/30/2005 9:15:30 PM PST by George Smiley (This tagline deliberately targeted journalists.)
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To: George Smiley

He is married now to a real control freak...I guess the saying is true...you reap what you sow!! LOL

Couldn't have happened to a better man!!! :)

I am single and plan to stay that way til my youngest is 18 and my kids will not be able to be hurt by my bad choices in men!


37 posted on 03/30/2005 9:19:42 PM PST by trussell (I am frowning today. God please save Terri, comfort her family. Grant them rest, and peace.)
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To: DameAutour

I love my husband but I didn't realize how absolutely and deeply a human could love until my son. Wait till you have kids, and then tell me you love your spouse more!
My love for my child is so overwhelming that it brings me to tears sometimes. It has also brought me closer to God.


38 posted on 03/30/2005 9:21:45 PM PST by Free2BeMe
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To: Free2BeMe

I have five kids.

I love my spouse more, in a different way.


39 posted on 03/30/2005 9:27:29 PM PST by It's me
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To: Ulysses

I happen to agree with you. Here is how I see it. Your kids leave you when they are grown and they should, this is the way it works. If you put them first in your life then when they are gone you have nothing left.Lots of divorces occur because of this syndrome. Your spouse should be the main love of your life because they will be with you until you die, or they should be at any rate!


40 posted on 03/30/2005 9:32:26 PM PST by calex59
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