Nice jeans. But should you really wear them to the opera?

NEW YORK – They've been part of the American "uniform" for years, worn to casual restaurants, house parties, and some workplaces.

But as jeans become more expensive, they are also becoming more ubiquitous, showing up everywhere from Midwestern churches to Broadway shows. Nothing is off limits, it seems. Or is it? Among those who buy high-priced, designer denim or who simply don jeans frequently - there's debate about where it's appropriate to wear them.

The tug of war over jeans etiquette is particularly prevalent in New York City. Here, people tend to be more creative about their appearance, and are often more demanding about how fashion-conscious people should look, says Dannielle Romano, editor at large for DailyCandy.com, a fashion and trends website.

Many 20- and 30-somethings here have theater backgrounds, for example, and often say it's inappropriate to wear jeans to theater and other cultural performances out of respect for the performers and the surroundings (even though the venues themselves have no official dress codes).

"I am all in favor of the current denim revolution that we are having, but I do feel that there are times when jeans should be left at home," says Lisa Kerson, a jewelry designer in her early 30s, whose parents insisted that she look nice when going to a play or traveling on a plane. "I still get bothered when I see people wearing jeans to the theater, ballet, opera, etc.," she says in an e-mail.

Melissa Popiel also prefers not to see denim at the theater, or at an engagement party. To her, jeans are OK for a house party or a casual dinner, but not for traditionally dressy places. "I don't like going to cocktail parties and seeing people in jeans," says the advertising executive, who's in her late 20s.

Ms. Popiel estimates she owns about 15 to 20 pairs, including premium brands, and has paid as much as $200 for a pair.

Many others are also paying big bucks for their jeans - from $150 to $1,000 or more per pair. Celebrities, in particular, are making jeans their garb of choice for appearances on talk shows and at some red-carpet events.

That, say fashion experts, sets the tone for the masses, who are encouraged by features like one in the Jan. 24 edition of Us magazine, "Hollywood's 10 Hottest Jeans," complete with suggestions for buying "premium" denim ($140 or more).

The concept of designer jeans is not new, however. They were also hot in the 1970s and 80s.

Etiquette experts offer few hard and fast rules about jeans, but among them are the obvious: Leave them in the closet when you're attending a wedding, or if your workplace bans them.

"A lot of it has to do with the appropriateness of the kind of jean you're wearing," says Peter Post, grandson of manners maven Emily Post and author of the book "Essential Manners for Men."

It comes down to determining if the jeans are for fashion or work. A pair that you do yard work in, for example, are "probably not appropriate to be wearing to a restaurant that night," he explains.

Mr. Post has seen men show up in quality restaurants wearing denim, which doesn't bother him as much as how sloppy their appearance sometimes is.He recalls seeing a man dressed in a T-shirt and old rumpled jeans. "He hadn't taken any care to step it up just a notch, to say to the woman he was with, 'You know, you're really important to me. I want to look good. I want you to look at me and be proud of me,' " he says.

Dark denim is making it easier for men to comfortably wear jeans in the evenings, especially since black jeans are no longer "in." But no matter how hip a certain style may be, some places are still off-limits.

"I probably won't wear them to a funeral," says Robert Smith, a 30- something businessman in Rockton, Ill. But in the past few years he's started wearing them everywhere else - to church and to most work-related functions.

The good news for jeans devotees is that standards for judging people on their appearance are loosening a bit - at least among women under 40. A recent study by Cotton Incorporated indicates that Generation X-age women (26 to 39) are less concerned about first impressions when it comes to dressing than they were 10 years ago, and more often are taking the approach that "you can't judge a book by its cover." The reverse was true for women boomer-age and older.

Alice Harris, author of the book "The Blue Jean," attributes the rise of jeans to casual Fridays in workplaces, which shifted the way people viewed dressing.

"We've actually gone back to a much simpler way of looking at it," suggests Post of the changing attitudes. It's not that certain materials, like denim, are bad. "It's what you've done with that material."

"It is NEVER appropriate to wear jeans to a church service."

Scripture please? Or does what Scripture say even matter in churches anymore? What about a poor homeless guy who walked in off the street? Or would that be okay, because he's just a poor homeless guy and... well, you know... he's not really one of us, just one of the poor ignorant folk that we can take pity on but never fellowship with.

James 2:1-11

2:1 My brothers, as believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ, don't show favoritism. 2 Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in shabby clothes also comes in. 3 If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, "Here's a good seat for you," but say to the poor man, "You stand there" or "Sit on the floor by my feet," 4 have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?

5 Listen, my dear brothers: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him? 6 But you have insulted the poor. Is it not the rich who are exploiting you? Are they not the ones who are dragging you into court? 7 Are they not the ones who are slandering the noble name of him to whom you belong?

8 If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, "Love your neighbor as yourself," you are doing right. 9 But if you show favoritism, you sin and are convicted by the law as lawbreakers. 10 For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it. 11 For he who said, "Do not commit adultery," also said, "Do not murder." If you do not commit adultery but do commit murder, you have become a lawbreaker.
(from New International Version)

"Is it not the rich who are exploiting you?" Wow, that'll put a dent in most of your conservative philosophy, huh?

"A fellowship meeting, yes. A Wednesday-night potluck dinner, sure."

Oh, so there are times that are more sacred to God than other times? Are fellowship meetings and potluck dinners pretty much a safe bet because the name of God doesn't come up anyway unless Sister Bertha-Better-Than-You burns her hand on the darn potluck?

1 Cor 10:31

31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.
(from New International Version) - Emphasis mine

God wants all of us, every thought, word, moment and deed. Our entire lives are to be an act of worship. Worship is not only singing hymns, lifting hands or listening to the preacher (in fact, a lot of the time, it is the antithesis of worship and much of it is self-centered rather than God-centered). Worship is who we are and how we live our lives and how every breath we take should be done with our eyes on eternity; an undying, unyielding sense of self-sacrifice in living dangerously and radically for God because He deserves no less than our total obedience.

"When you are worshiping, or allegedly doing so, NO FREAKIN' WAY."

I think "allegedly doing so" would probably be the rule here for the type of worship you are describing, although you probably didn't intend to mean it that way or are unaware of it..

Rom 12:1-2

12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-this is your spiritual act of worship. 2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will.
(from New International Version)

Notice he did not say, "be transformed by the renewing of your clothes or hairstyle or appearance." The only rule God puts on clothing is modesty. I've seen wealthy women walking out of wealthy churches wearing expensive clothing but reveal more than their spiritual side to say the least.

Please don't take my post as a personal attack upon you. In fact, I hope my post is more of an encouragement and challenge to both you and myself (except for that whole 'biting sarcasm' thing). I actually appreciate having the chance to interact with you on this because it allows me to see my own sins (not shortcomings, that's just a pretty way of glossing over our own personal transgressions) and how far I truly am from "pure, undefiled worship". (James 1:27)

Oh, and just as an aside, here's another shot across the heavenly bow that could have import for modern-day conservatism, specifically the conservatism that demands that corporations and employers be allowed to take advantage of cheap-immigrant labor, the kind of work "that Americans won't do".

James 5:1-5
5:1 Now listen, you rich people, weep and wail because of the misery that is coming upon you. 2 Your wealth has rotted, and moths have eaten your clothes. 3 Your gold and silver are corroded. Their corrosion will testify against you and eat your flesh like fire. You have hoarded wealth in the last days. 4 Look! The wages you failed to pay the workmen who mowed your fields are crying out against you. The cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord Almighty. 5 You have lived on earth in luxury and self-indulgence. You have fattened yourselves in the day of slaughter.
(from New International Version)

Ladies, what say y'all?

Who cares?

1 Cor 14:33-35

As in all the congregations of the saints, 34 women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission, as the Law says. 35 If they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church.
(from New International Version)

1 Tim 2:11-12

11 A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent.
(from New International Version)

Okay, okay, I was only kidding about the last point. There were certainly cultural considerations and peculiar problems to those churches and this was not necessarily a universal rule to all of the church for all ages (although some extreme literalists would fight with me over that).

But I couldn't resist. :-)

Here's some food for thought... :)

In a large city in a very large and beautifully decorated and expesnively adorned church a service is being held. The people there are well dressed in their fonery and they all are wearing the best jewelery. A man walks in late. He appears a cowboy to look at him. He has on a pair of clean, but well worn almost worn out jeans. His top is clean, but ragged. He has a beat up western style hat on his head. When he enters there is silence, even from the pastor. People look, some stare. Some children giggle and some even point. Still others just look away.

When the man sits down, people scoot over away from him.

The pastor, who was giving a sermon, walks down from the pulpit. He walks over to the man and whispers to him. "Sir, I think you should go home, and talk to God with your heart. Ask him how you should dress when worshipping in this church."

After the service, the man goes home and prays.

The following week he returns to this church. He is in the same ragged shirt and worn jeans that he wore the week before. He still wears the tattered hat. He is greeted again by looks of disdain and children's giggling.

This time, the pastor is not so quiet in addressing this man. He walks down from the altar and approaches him. He says, rather loudly "I thought I told you to talk to God and to ask him how you should dress to worship in this church."

The man tips his hat in respect and says to the pastor, "Well sir, I did. I went home and I prayed with my heart and asked God how one should dress when worshipping in your church."

The pastor looks at him and asks, "And what did he say?"

The man looks around and replies, "Well sir, he said he didn't know. He's never been in your church."

Now, I attend a congregation that appreciates the fact they should conduct themselves before G-d at least as well as they would before the Pres. of the USA or HRH Queen Elizabeth.

God is Spirit. He doesn't need to be impressed by our outward appearance. Do you pray to God in your underwear? Do you wake up in the morning with your hair all messed up and tell God, "Wait to I take a shower and brush my teeth, then we can talk"? Are we to be more "spiritual" when we come before God corporately than when we come to Him individually? Is your attitude (although possibly sincere and well-intentioned) and that of your church's unintentionally excluding the less fortunate or just simple working men and women who don't feel they can fit in or live up to your fashion dogma?

John 4:23-24
23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24 God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth."
(from New International Version)

And didn't Jesus leave us a different example than that of the President of the United States or the Queen of England?

Matt 20:24-28
25 Jesus called them together and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. 26 Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever wants to be first must be your slave- 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
(from New International Version)

Luke 22:24-27

24 Also a dispute arose among them as to which of them was considered to be greatest. 25 Jesus said to them, "The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those who exercise authority over them call themselves Benefactors. 26 But you are not to be like that. Instead, the greatest among you should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves. 27 For who is greater, the one who is at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who is at the table? But I am among you as one who serves.
(from New International Version)

John 13:2-5

2 The evening meal was being served, and the devil had already prompted Judas Iscariot, son of Simon, to betray Jesus. 3 Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; 4 so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. 5 After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples' feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.
(from New International Version)

John 13:12-17

12 When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" he asked them. 13 "You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. 14 Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. 15 I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. 16 I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17 Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.
(from New International Version)

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