Surprised Customer Says Penis Pills Don't Work

Reuters ^ | Tue Feb 15, 2005 08:24 AM ET

[MaxMax]

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - A New Jersey man has filed a false advertising lawsuit against a maker of herbal penis enlargement pills, alleging the medicine does not fulfill its promises, the plaintiff's lawyer said on Monday.

Two similar cases, filed last year in Colorado and Ohio, accuse manufacturers of herbal dietary supplements, VigRx and Enzyte, of falsely claiming to be able to add substantial length and girth to a man's penis.

All three suits seek class action status and claim to represent more than 1 million total plaintiffs.

In the latest case, filed on Jan. 21 in New Jersey state court, plaintiff Michael Coluzzi claimed he paid $59.95 for a 30-day supply of Alzare pills but "experienced no increase in penis size," and then was unable to collect a promised refund from manufacturer Alzare LLC of Boca Raton, Florida.

Neither Alzare nor chief operating officer Scott Hammond, both named as defendants, could be reached for comment.

Coluzzi's attorney, Stephen DeNittis, said many men had been taken in by dubious claims that the product would add up to 3 inches (7.5 cm) to their penises by "very, very convincing" advertising, such as infomercials featuring doctors and porn stars.

"Males, for whatever reason, may be susceptible because of what they feel they lack," DeNittis said. "It was so believable I confirmed with an expert (that the claims were false) before I filed the lawsuit. They said they had done medical studies proving that it works."

The ads for Alzare tablets, comprised of ginseng, yohimbe bark, L-arginine and other ingredients, guaranteed results within a week and claimed a 95 percent success rate in the more than 100,000 men who have used it, the suit said.

But last year, the Center for Science in the Public Interest filed a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission saying the maker of Enzyte had not backed up its claims with science.

Although thousands of complaints have been registered with local government agencies and the Better Business Bureau, few lawsuits have been filed because the companies appear to be "judgment proof," DeNittis said.

"They don't have enough assets for plaintiffs to recover, and some of the defendants are fly-by-night -- they close up shop after they get sued," he said.

All three lawsuits claim that plaintiffs were unable to contact the companies for guaranteed refunds after spending hundreds of dollars for the penis enhancers.

[NeoCaveman]

Guess it will be difficult to see what is in plaintiffs' trial briefs.

Sounds like a case that will be thrown out due to lack of evidence....

[Hammerhead]

"The ads for Alzare tablets, comprised of ginseng, yohimbe bark, L-arginine and other ingredients, "


all available on the vitamin shelf at the local drug store.


idiots.


luckily, I never needed such suppliments.


Ladies????........

[pointsal]

These ads would be more credible if Bill Klintoon and his intern of choice were the spokespersons.

[libstripper]

Each of these plaintiffs no doubt believed everything in the spam e-mails he received. A fool and his money are soon parted.

[Iwo Jima]

I was going to say that these guys came up on the short end of the stick, again.

[Beckwith]

Worked for me. Now I have to tuck it into my sock.

[pabianice]

All three suits seek class action status and claim to represent more than 1 million total plaintiffs.

There are really that many stupid men out there?

[goldstategop]

Every guy wants to be bigger. Believe me, I know the feeling. No, we don't want to be hung like a horse, but putting the girls on edge a little, that's a whole 'nother story. HAHAHAHAHA

Denny Crane: "There are two places to find the truth. First God and then Fox News."

[pabianice]

Idiots. They should have stayed with the tried and true Dr. Kaplan's Penis Enlargement Pump (warning: graphic pic)

[goldstategop]

More like a lot of men who think a bigger love muscle would make them last longer and satisfy their women better. This kind of scam will always find men desperate to think they'd be the lady-killers they've always dreamed of in their fantasies.

Denny Crane: "There are two places to find the truth. First God and then Fox News."

[Richard Kimball]

I can't believe anybody falls for those ads.

[LexBaird]

Worked for me. Now I have to tuck it into my sock.

Pantyhose don't count as socks.

[Beckwith]

I didn't say pantyhose. I wear ankle socks.

[LexBaird]

So, what do you wear on your feet?

[from occupied ga]

New Jersey man has filed a false advertising lawsuit against a maker of herbal penis enlargement pills, alleging the medicine does not fulfill its promises, the plaintiff's lawyer said on Monday.

Two things -

1. New Jersey where stupid people who aren't quite stupid enough to live in NYC live (based on the fact that Kerry got a higher fraction of the vote in NYC than in NJ)
2. This might explain why Lautenberg got elected

I thought that this was from the onion when I first saw it.

[najida]

The commercials alone are--
Brillantly awful.

[hobbes1]

In the latest case, filed on Jan. 21 in New Jersey state court, plaintiff Michael Coluzzi claimed he paid $59.95 for a 30-day supply of Alzare pills but "experienced no increase in penis size,"

This suit must be dismissed.

This guy is a bigger d!ck today, then when he ordered the pills, no two ways about it.

[reagan_fanatic]

plaintiff Michael Coluzzi claimed he paid $59.95 for a 30-day supply of Alzare pills

This guy is willing to pay $60/month for a bigger knob? Sounds like he needs either a surgeon or a shrink.

[Beckwith]

So, what do you wear on your feet?

Sneakers, over the socks, over the, well, you know!

[LexBaird]

Isn't that uncomfortable, what with your socks up in your underwear and all? Do you practice extreme yoga?