The Polish were branded as stupid because the French were in the bathroom at "stereotyping label" time.
Sounds good!
Okay. Enough of the Polish jokes.
Here's an Irish joke:
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim
Finnegan arrives at her door. "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya".
"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"
"That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda." There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, Brenda... no. In fact, he got out three times to pee."
It's getting harder and harder to tell jokes that make fun of people. But have a heart, rednecks and fat people are still fair game.
Speaking of Polish battleships, did you hear about the Polish submarine with a screen door? Don't laugh, it keeps the fish out.
BWAHAHAHAHA! Bad choice ya dumb pol......
Don't flame me please, I'm from Polish/Irish/Lithuanian stock. I just find it hilarious.
FMCDH(BITS)
Who was Alexander Graham Zdanowicz?
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The first telephone Pole.
When we can't accept humor directed at ourselves this will become a very sad society. Humor is the best health food in life. If you do away with it you shorten life.
"An Aggie was down on his luck so he decided to go out and kidnap a child to get the ransom. He went to the park and snuck up on one of the kids. He grabbed him and took him behind a tree. He told the kid that he was kidnapped and pinned a note on the kid's shirt that read, "I have kidnapped your child. If you want to see him again, put $20,000 in a sack and leave it in front of the tree at the park. Signed, An Aggie."
He told the child to make sure his parents saw the note and sent the child home."
The next day the Aggie went to the tree to find the sack. He looked inside and found the money he had asked for and a note that read, "How could one Aggie do this to another Aggie"?"
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" The teachers at A&M were having their weekly staff meeting when one teacher spoke up and said "Do you people realize we have a student here who has been attending classes for over nine years and he still hasn't receiced a degree???"
Why no we didn't know that . What can we do? We don't want A&M to get a bad name. I know, one teacher said, "Let's gather all the students at Kyle field and give this guy a pop test. Something simple he can't possibly miss, and then we will hand him his diploma."
The next day everyone was gathered in the stadium. The teacher announced over the PA system, now son if you can answer this question, you will become a graduate of Texas A&M. Okay?
Okay he said.
Now take your time and answer this. How much is 3 plus 4? The student became deep in thought for a long period of time. Finally he spoke. The answer is 7!
The crowd went into an uproar and started hollering, whooping, and chanting, GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE, GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE !"
Here's one that Ronald Reagan reportedly told once:
Q: You go to a cockfight. How do you know if a [Polish person] is there?
A: Someone enters a duck.
Q: How do you know if an Irishman is there?
A: Someone bets on the duck.
Q: How do you know if an Italian is there?
A: The duck wins.