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Democrats to Cancel Festivities (Vanity)
M. Barron | January 9, 2005 | M. Barron

Posted on 01/09/2005 7:22:51 PM PST by missanne

Democrats Cancel Inauguration Festivities

January 9, 2005 (Washington, D.C.) Democratic National Committee (DNC) Chairman Terry McCauliffe and Party Presidential nominee John F. Kerry announced today that upcoming events scheduled for the January 20th Inauguration have been cancelled so the money can be used to aid the United Nations effort to care for Tsunami victims. "Democrats have a long and proud tradition of using other people's money to help others, and we feel this is a prudent way for us to make up for the lack of victim relief funding by the Republican Congress," stated McCauliffe.

When asked how Democrats could cancel the Republican Inaugural Galas, the DNC Chair said "Since Senator Kerry never officially asked his team of thousands of attorneys to stand down, and after reviewing the rampant voter fraud in Ohio, we feel we may still win the Presidential election, we're certain that Governor Bush is aware of this, too" McCauliffe added that "If the Republicans want to restore faith in our government, especially among the millions of voters disenfranchised by the scandalous attack TV ads ran by Republicans, this is a start".

When asked how they planned on stopping the celebration, Senator Kerry responded, "bipartisanship among the two parties is vital as we rebound from the current recession, and we decided to show as leaders, we do want to help the Republicans make good bipartisan decisions. Terry and I came to a bipartisan agreement about this as well."

Kerry also reflected on his heroic military past and added that the tsunami was "quite frankly the most brutal and barbaric act committed by the United States since the military atrocities the Nixon administration committed attacking the peaceful peoples of Vietnam." McCauliffe agreed. adding "everyone knows that Republicans have always starved our senior citizens, gouged drug prices, and cut funding for school lunch programs. For once, our brothers and sisters across the aisle can be in step with America, and make amends for a history of mistakes." The Junior Senator said that Republicans should still celebrate, as "I have taken a leadership role for this administration and booked all the rooms at three downtown Motel 6 locations for visiting party goers to relish the coronation of the 'Republican Ruler'. I am also proud to announce that my home state friend and colleague, Senator Kennedy, has volunteered to assist in finding entertainment that will satisfy everyone in the compound." -


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: democrats; kerry; mccauliffe; presidentbush; republicans
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You know this is how they would like to stop the celebration if they could..........
1 posted on 01/09/2005 7:22:52 PM PST by missanne
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To: missanne

Sorelosermen all.


2 posted on 01/09/2005 7:25:30 PM PST by Jim Robinson
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To: missanne
lol. predictable.
3 posted on 01/09/2005 7:25:50 PM PST by commonguymd (My impatience is far more advanced than any known technology.)
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To: missanne

QUICK!!!

Someone check to see if a whole bunch of rooms at the Washington Plaza Hotel just became available!!!!


4 posted on 01/09/2005 7:26:35 PM PST by Pete'sWife (Dirt is for racing... asphalt is for getting there.)
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To: missanne

Democrats have a long and proud tradition of using other people's money to help others.

This is something you would expect a Republican to say about a Dem. It's funny considering the source. The irony, I think, escapes Mr. McAullife, though.


5 posted on 01/09/2005 7:26:54 PM PST by Sterrins
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To: missanne

onion?


6 posted on 01/09/2005 7:28:02 PM PST by Bronco_Buster_FweetHyagh
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To: missanne

Oh, now isn't that special! And of course McAuliffe has to get his jabs in at the Republicans.

And the only other people they help with other peoples money are themselves and the people they get to stay on the plantation.


7 posted on 01/09/2005 7:28:49 PM PST by Theresawithanh (2005! My resolution: FReep even MORE this year!!!)
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To: Sterrins

Is this from Scrappleface? It's got to be satire.


8 posted on 01/09/2005 7:29:34 PM PST by digitalbrownshirt
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To: missanne

Geez youse guys are gullible. Don't you recognize a spoof when you see one?


9 posted on 01/09/2005 7:29:51 PM PST by Archangelsk (Plain, simple soldier. Nothing more, nothing less.)
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To: Archangelsk

Is this a joke?


10 posted on 01/09/2005 7:30:35 PM PST by bjcoop
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To: digitalbrownshirt

Looking at it a second, even third time, I must believe it is. But seeing the crazy things Dems are saying, I would not be surprised if it was not.


11 posted on 01/09/2005 7:30:45 PM PST by Sterrins
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To: missanne

"Democrats have a long and proud tradition of using other people's money to help others, and we feel this is a prudent way for us to make up for the lack of victim relief funding by the Republican Congress," stated McCauliffe."


Insane...right out of their own mouths. How about using their OWN money to help others?


12 posted on 01/09/2005 7:31:01 PM PST by borntobeagle
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To: Theresawithanh

Oh wait, this has to be satire! Even McAuliffe and Kerry aren't THAT stupid!


13 posted on 01/09/2005 7:31:03 PM PST by Theresawithanh (2005! My resolution: FReep even MORE this year!!!)
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To: missanne

What is the source of this money to which it will be directed to the tsunami fund?


14 posted on 01/09/2005 7:32:05 PM PST by Cobra64 (Babes should wear Bullet Bras - www.BulletBras.net)
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To: borntobeagle

hahaha...I see a joke, had me there for a second!


15 posted on 01/09/2005 7:33:10 PM PST by borntobeagle
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To: missanne

I know this is a joke, but...

No joke, why aren't the democrats (and everyone else) demanding the return of the billions in oil-for-food scam money so it can be sent to the tsunami victims? The January 20th parties pale in comparison.


16 posted on 01/09/2005 7:40:16 PM PST by whereasandsoforth
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To: Jim Robinson

Perhaps they should have Rev. Jackson and Rev. Sharpton marry 1000 homosexuals and rent 500 portable toilets for honeymoon suites...


17 posted on 01/09/2005 7:41:48 PM PST by Sir Francis Dashwood (LET'S ROLL!)
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To: digitalbrownshirt

It's satire. But not too far from what these morons say to the sheeple.


18 posted on 01/09/2005 7:49:24 PM PST by Cobra64 (Babes should wear Bullet Bras - www.BulletBras.net)
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To: Archangelsk
Geez youse guys are gullible. Don't you recognize a spoof when you see one?

Apparently not.

However, I'd love to hear read this (and not laugh or chortle) at noon tomorrow.

19 posted on 01/09/2005 7:51:34 PM PST by Cobra64 (Babes should wear Bullet Bras - www.BulletBras.net)
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To: missanne
Now this has been posted, don't be surprised if the Dems do make a similar announcement...they've got bugger all to celebrate!
20 posted on 01/09/2005 7:52:05 PM PST by Aussie Dasher (Stop Hillary - PEGGY NOONAN '08)
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