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Married, without children: Finding fulfillment with no kids
Rocky Mountain News ^ | 1/3/05 | Mark Wolf

Posted on 01/03/2005 8:31:56 AM PST by qam1

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To: HairOfTheDog
Well, it definitely sounds like horses are your highest priority.

I don't understand that, but I hope things go well for you in your life.

381 posted on 01/03/2005 11:09:32 AM PST by Artist
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To: GOP_1900AD

He most assuredly has...five fold! LOL

God Bless you as well. :)


382 posted on 01/03/2005 11:09:49 AM PST by exnavychick (Just my two cents, as usual.)
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To: Ellesu
If you choose to have children, you make the sacrifices and shut-up, if you choose not to, don't complain about not getting any attention or get defensive and tell me your reasons for remaining childless.

Best response on this thread!

383 posted on 01/03/2005 11:10:26 AM PST by retrokitten
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To: Slyfox
If you are an empty nester then you are not too far away from all your friends talking about nothing but who just died, their most recent bowel surgeries and golf scores.

Bring it on! 8-)

Seriously, when my sister came over our house for Christmas she was greeted by my mother-in-law with, "egg nog gives me gas." My sister looked a little surprised and said, "Merry Christmas!"

384 posted on 01/03/2005 11:10:57 AM PST by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: Modernman
Furthermore, I would wager that DINK couples contribute more to society than they take out, financially-speaking.

Yeah but they only do it in one generation.

385 posted on 01/03/2005 11:12:00 AM PST by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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To: Slyfox

My mother-in-law is an "old lady" who has lived in BOTH
Az and Fla.(currently in FLA) --the rest of the family is in Illinois and NJ, but her eldest son lives a few miles from her in Ft. Lauderdale. Currently her biggest problem is her boyfriend from "the complex" not wanting committment
and possibly finding out she's 87, when he's 77. High school all over again .


386 posted on 01/03/2005 11:13:44 AM PST by willyboyishere
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To: AppyPappy
Yeah but they only do it in one generation.

Sure, but that doesn't change the fact that they are net contributors to society, even over the long run.

387 posted on 01/03/2005 11:14:50 AM PST by Modernman (What is moral is what you feel good after. - Ernest Hemingway)
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To: Artist
Well, it definitely sounds like horses are your highest priority. I don't understand that, but I hope things go well for you in your life.

My life and my husbands life, our wants and desires, is our highest priority, yes. Your priority of raising children is really about your desires too, and there is nothing wrong with that. Feel good about it. People love raising kids, or sometimes decide not to, because it is ~their~ desire to live that life. Neither choice is an illness. It's just people living their shot at the life of their choosing is all.

388 posted on 01/03/2005 11:17:23 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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To: willyboyishere

One of the more popular personalized license plate holders in the state of Florida..usually seen on BIG RV's..says' "I'm spending my children's inheritence"


389 posted on 01/03/2005 11:17:23 AM PST by ken5050 (Ann Coulter needs to have children ASAP to propagate her gene pool. Any volunteers?)
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To: Artist
Well, it definitely sounds like horses are your highest priority. I don't understand that, but I hope things go well for you in your life.

BTW, you ignored the much more serious part of my post, and focused on the part you could slam me about. Don't think I didn't notice.

390 posted on 01/03/2005 11:21:51 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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To: DarkSavant
You have a source or reference for that? I believe you, but I don't remember ever reading that in the Catechism.

Willful exclusion of children is grounds for an anullment.

Willful exclusion of children (Canon 1101, sec. 2)

You or your spouse married intending, either explicitly or implicitly, to deny the other's right to sexual acts open to procreation.

Regarding natural marriage, I found this:
Traditionally speaking, the primary purpose of marriage is the generation and nurturing of offspring; the second purpose is the mutual help of spouses, and the third is the remedy for concupiscence.1 Even before marriage was perfected by grace in the Sacrament of Matrimony, God called His people to love and serve Him and each other in the married state. The intimate community of life and love which constitutes the married state has been established by the Creator and endowed by Him with its own proper laws . . . God Himself is the author of marriage. 2

Marriage is the natural, indissoluble union, perfected by the Sacrament, between one man and one woman directed towards the purpose of preserving the human race by generating and raising children. Marriage is also ordered to the mutual help of spouses and the remedy for sexual desire. This definition of marriage as a natural institution can be arrived at by common sense. Nature implants in men and women an instinct that impels them to seek the companionship of marriage and in this companionship, husband and wife are able to hope for help and an easing of their physical discomforts as they get older.3


391 posted on 01/03/2005 11:24:35 AM PST by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: Aquinasfan
The solution here is to dump soccer practice and paying for college. It kills me that people say that they can't have any more children because they couldn't afford college for two or three or whatever. Who the hell cares about college in comparison to bringing another life into the world?

Sadly, in my town, there are an awful lot of people who are so consumed by living the parenthood script that I doubt they even remember their childrens' names. Just as a few people who are parents castigate the childless, there are also parents who feel "it is all about THEM".

392 posted on 01/03/2005 11:25:43 AM PST by Gorzaloon
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To: exnavychick

"Well, if you have priorities in life that would seriously conflict with having children, I would have to say that it's probably best to not have them."

I agree.

"It's not nearly as disruptive as they think it is...unless you are a complete party animal."

As a mother, I'd have to disagree with that. Having children is disruptive and in my case, I'd say that is good. Once my son was born, friends and parties were forced to the back of the line. Suddenly, my life and the life of my husband were no longer about us....it was about our son and doing right by him. It's a huge undertaking when having kids and most don't realize that until they have kids of there own.


393 posted on 01/03/2005 11:28:16 AM PST by Arpege92 (Modern liberalism requires everyone to look different but think the same. - Lizavetta)
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To: Aquinasfan
Willful exclusion of children is grounds for an anullment.... You or your spouse married intending, either explicitly or implicitly, to deny the other's right to sexual acts open to procreation.

I am not Catholic or bound to Catholic custom, but your example is of a couple who are not of the same mind, not those couples who mutually agree.

394 posted on 01/03/2005 11:29:28 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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To: Arpege92

I suppose you are right. I guess I just don't think of kids as a disruption, per se. It's just a shift.

Or chaos, perhaps. :) LOL


395 posted on 01/03/2005 11:29:38 AM PST by exnavychick (Just my two cents, as usual.)
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To: ken5050

That's always been my favorite license plate motto.


396 posted on 01/03/2005 11:29:40 AM PST by willyboyishere
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To: exnavychick; Arpege92

kids ain't the distraction..now, grandchildren...


397 posted on 01/03/2005 11:31:01 AM PST by ken5050 (Ann Coulter needs to have children ASAP to propagate her gene pool. Any volunteers?)
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To: GOP_1900AD

Debt? Like what kind?

hate relying on government schools for education - I sent my kids to private school as long as I could. I do not think a cent of government money should be spent on day care, including head start. In fact, I wish there was no such thing as a government school, beginning with preschool all the way through university.


398 posted on 01/03/2005 11:31:56 AM PST by DennisR (Look around - there are countless observable hints that God exists)
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To: ken5050

It's gonna be a long while before I get the pleasure of grandkids. *sigh*

I get an inkling, though, from being an aunt! :)


399 posted on 01/03/2005 11:32:25 AM PST by exnavychick (Just my two cents, as usual.)
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To: Bella_Bru
Wow. How...socialist of you. We must all have many kids to keep the social services machine running?

Run the clock ahead a few years on France and you get a Muslim nation. Why? Muslims have babies, the French don't.

Just because you don't like the truth does not make it any less true.

If you want to say "After me, the deluge" that is your right, and I never proposed taking it away.

400 posted on 01/03/2005 11:33:02 AM PST by hopespringseternal
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