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Queers who don't act right: Of gay sex, marriage and the sauna
Creative Loafing (Atlanta) ^ | 11/18/04 | Cliff Bostock

Posted on 12/02/2004 11:17:15 AM PST by madprof98

A few months ago, without warning, the mainly gay LA Fitness at Ansley Mall closed its small sauna. No explanation was given, but word got around quickly that sex was to blame. This was effectively confirmed when the sauna reopened with a picture window that offers a locker-room view of those naked few who care to be on display like overheated zoo animals. The entrance now features a sign warning that the gym is cooperating with Atlanta police to curb "misconduct."

I'm sure the people of Midtown are sleeping more soundly now that they know they are safe from the inadvertent sight of fellatio -- I mean, misconduct -- at LA Fitness.

The sauna drama came to mind last week when I went to hear Matt Bernstein Sycamore talk about his radical anthology, That's Revolting!: Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation, at Outwrite Bookstore. Sycamore talked about the way the gay movement, which in the '70s radically opposed the institutions of the dominant culture, now mainly seeks assimilation by those institutions.

Marriage, of course, is the primary example of that, with military service following close behind. In Sycamore's view, the desire to marry or join the army only perpetuates patriarchy, sexism and imperialism. In his anti-assimilation view, the proper role of queers is to oppose such institutions, not to join them.

From that perspective, homosexuality inherently opposes oppressive institutions because it represents a difference -- a profound sexual one -- that cannot really be transcended. Homosexuals have always been targets when a culture war -- an ideological conflict -- erupts. Of course, mainstream gay people abhor this fatalistic attitude, but we have no better evidence of its truth than the present.

After a decade of attempting assimilation, even making some real progress in the overturning of sodomy laws, gay people have been freshly demonized by President Bush. In order to secure his election and entrench the power of his party, he has actually proposed making discrimination against gay people a feature of the U.S. Constitution. And 11 states in the last election adopted anti-gay marriage laws, many of whose fine print goes further in discriminating.

Obviously, focusing on the right to marry does little to address the underlying homophobia of the culture. It produces a reflexive backlash of virulent legislative homophobia. And making marriage such a priority legitimates the notion that heterosexual-style union is the ideal. Mainstream gay Americans seem oblivious to the fact that a state-sanctioned marriage, although granting some legal benefits, isn't inherently more valid than any other kind of relationship. From a perspective like Sycamore's, we should be fighting to extend the benefits of marriage to everyone, not trying to get married to share them.

How does that relate to the drama of the sauna at Ansley Mall?

The effort to control sexual expression is the principal effort of the assimilation movement. Using the argument for "decency" and respect for social conventions, the assimilation-minded attempt to render the principal difference of gay people -- their sex lives -- invisible. (Of course, nothing makes sex look more wholesome or boring or invisible than marriage.)

I know it's shocking, but many gay men have lots of sex in lots of strange locations for the simple reason that they can. It does not mean they commit acts of sodomy in intentional public view. The only thing that makes sex in a sauna a public act is the intrusion of someone else. If that were not so, the remedy would not be a picture window!

There is a famous instructional film to teach police departments how to catch men having sex in bathrooms by installing secret cameras. The film is full of shots of (mainly married) men furtively coupling. But an objective viewer realizes that the only thing that makes the sex truly public is the camera's presence. Whenever anyone enters the bathroom, the men stop what they are doing, and most are doing it hidden within a stall, anyway. The objective is obviously not to stop the otherwise unseen sex, a silly enough objective, or they would put the camera in open view, in the same way LA Fitness installed a picture window. The real objective is to punish the men for having sex at all.

Now gay people do this to themselves. In West Hollywood, America's only gay-governed city, I used to work out at a gym where you could be expelled simply for looking too intently at someone in a shower. And the city was among the country's most aggressive in enforcing laws against sex in public restrooms.

Personally, I find stumbling upon any sex scene to which I have not been invited annoying, but I've not felt the need to call 911 or the eye bank for emergency treatment of my offended gaze. Gay people can have a variety of feelings about the virtue of assimilation and they can establish their own boundaries about sexual expression. But trying to impose conservative decisions in that regard on the entire community only duplicates the right wing's demand for compliance and invisibility. It is obvious that such compliance earns them nothing.

cliff.bostock@creativeloafing.com


TOPICS: Culture/Society; US: Georgia
KEYWORDS: bostock; homosexualagenda
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This piece appeared in some copies of last week's edition of the free street paper here in Atlanta. The author is the paper's food critic and (supposedly) a licensed psychologist. Apparently enough people read it that it generated a bunch of outraged letters from the papers' generally radical/liberal readership. This week's paper recommended that readers who missed the piece find it online, which I did. I thought it was especially interesting in its very candid dismissal of all sexual conventions, including common decency, as so much "homophobia."
1 posted on 12/02/2004 11:17:15 AM PST by madprof98
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To: EdReform; Clint N. Suhks; lentulusgracchus; scripter; ArGee
ping
2 posted on 12/02/2004 11:22:06 AM PST by Bryan
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To: madprof98

Notably missing is mention of multiple random sex partners and the possible public health problems arising from this sort of lifestyle.


3 posted on 12/02/2004 11:22:35 AM PST by DBrow
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To: madprof98
Sycamore talked about the way the gay movement, which in the '70s radically opposed the institutions of the dominant culture, now mainly seeks assimilation by those institutions.

That's exactly backwards.

Gays do not seek assimilation by the institutions of the dominant culture, they seek to assmilate the institutions of the dominant culture into theirs.

4 posted on 12/02/2004 11:22:52 AM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Drug prohibition laws help fund terrorism.)
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To: madprof98

Wow. Since I have no desire to watch other people (whether married, gay, straight, etc...) have sex in places open to the public, that means I'm a "homophobe"? Wow. Now I feel all enlightened and s**t...


5 posted on 12/02/2004 11:23:19 AM PST by Chad Fairbanks ('Hate' is just a special kind of Love we give to people who suck.)
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To: madprof98

"Personally, I find stumbling upon any sex scene to which I have not been invited annoying"

Then don't go to New Orleans during Spring Break or Mardi Gras - heterosexual teenage couples are coupling all over the place. You have to step over them or around them while walking down the sidewalk at night in the French Quarter. We were there for a convention, our son sure got an eyeful! I wonder how many of these drunk teens even knew each other before that night, and what they remembered the next day? Cops were everywhere, to keep people from carrying glass containers out onto the sidewalks. I guess it cuts the butts of the drunk teens who are coupling on the sidewalks.....


6 posted on 12/02/2004 11:23:34 AM PST by buffyt (~ Get the UN out of the US and get the US out of the UN ! ~)
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To: madprof98
The only thing that makes sex in a sauna a public act is the intrusion of someone else.

No dumb shit... The only thing that makes sex in a sauna a public act is it's a public sauna!

7 posted on 12/02/2004 11:23:49 AM PST by tophat9000 (We didn’t rise they sunk look at the blue, water filled, sink holes map (Mike Moore Fatass divots ?)
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To: madprof98

Where the heck is the Barf alert?


8 posted on 12/02/2004 11:24:41 AM PST by Allosaurs_r_us (Idaho Carnivores for Conservatism)
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To: madprof98

Ironic that an article lamenting moves away from public anal sex comes from a site called "creative loafing."


9 posted on 12/02/2004 11:27:03 AM PST by r9etb
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To: Allosaurs_r_us

I thought the alert was implicit in the title :)


10 posted on 12/02/2004 11:27:24 AM PST by madprof98
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To: madprof98
From that perspective, homosexuality inherently opposes oppressive institutions because it represents a difference -- a profound sexual one -- that cannot really be transcended.

Point of order - Supposition of facts not in evidence. This whole fool piece is predicated on accepting that homosexuality is genetic, unchangeable, and inevitable. Ditto for the flagrant display of sexuality, serialized sex partners, etc.

I couldn't believe that much crap if my life depended on it. (I almost slipped Freudian and said "swallowed" - silly me!)

11 posted on 12/02/2004 11:28:48 AM PST by MortMan (On ne voire bien qu'avec la coeur.)
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To: madprof98

Hey, lets all talk about f@gs! F@gs, f@gs, f@gs! That's part of "the Agenda" too. Keeping talking about f@gs, on and on and on. Never stop. F@gs are good, f@gs are bad, blah, blah, blah.

I only stopped by this thread to talk more about f@gs.

Also to say, what they do is, put their private parts into each other's fecal matter. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Oh wait, there is something wrong with that.


12 posted on 12/02/2004 11:29:20 AM PST by subterfuge (Haven't you heard, I don't refrain...)
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To: Blue Jays
Hi All-

This is excellent news! Hey liberals, just keep up the good work so mainstream Americans can see what your agenda is all about.

The only that that would be even better is if all these deviants having sex in public would also hang a Kerry/Edwards sign next to them to drive the point home.

Similar to a comment from another FReeper above, I don't give a hoot whether it's straight or gay sex. I simply don't want another person's bodily fluids squishing between my toes in the sauna. Is that too much to ask? Perhaps my thinking is just narrow, backwards, and provincial?

~ Blue Jays ~

13 posted on 12/02/2004 11:31:58 AM PST by Blue Jays (Rock Hard, Ride Free)
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To: tophat9000

ROFL!!! hehehe ~jj


14 posted on 12/02/2004 11:33:07 AM PST by JesseJane ("If the enemy is in range, so are you." -Infantry Journal)
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To: madprof98
The source itself constitutes another barf alert.

An explicit one, at that.

15 posted on 12/02/2004 11:36:14 AM PST by thulldud (It's bad luck to be superstitious.)
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To: subterfuge

Oh wait, there is something wrong with that.
=====
Tell that to the Texas Court of Queers !!!


16 posted on 12/02/2004 11:37:09 AM PST by GeekDejure ( LOL = Liberals Obey Lucifer !!!)
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To: DBrow
Notably missing is mention of multiple random sex partners ...

Pretty much implicit in that "hooking up in the sauna" thing, dontcha think?

17 posted on 12/02/2004 11:43:34 AM PST by Salman
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To: madprof98
Here's what happened at my health club: About five years ago, the owner ended the family memebership plan. He won't admit it publically, but the reason has to do with too many roomates claiming to be a family.

Three years ago, the owner removed the hot tub in the men's locker room. The owner blamed his insurance underwriter who allegedly refused to insure the place unless he hired a life guard to supervise the hot tub. The real reason had to due with the all the gaylords who were using the hot tub as a dating service/pick-up bar for very short term relationships that generally began and ended a few minutes later either in the hot tub itself or the adjacent steam room.

Last year, the owner of the club closed down the steam room in the men's locker room allegedly due to a mold problem. Everyone knows, however, that the real reason had to due with the inability of gay men to control their "excitement."

Within the last two months the owner of the club remodeled the sauna in the men's locker room so that it now has wide glass doors and bright lights. Only a handful of people seem to use it these days.

Note that the womens' locker room still has a hot tub, steam room, and sauna. (Apparently, there are no insurance or mold problems in the women's locker room.) I'm absolutely certain that the health club has lots of lesbian/bi women, but unlike the gay men, they are apparently able to conduct themselves in a respectful manner.

18 posted on 12/02/2004 11:46:29 AM PST by Labyrinthos
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To: Labyrinthos

The Bally's chain of clubs in South Florida were/are notorious hangouts for Gay men. Ironically, they were originally marketed as "meet markets" for heterosexuals.


19 posted on 12/02/2004 11:53:15 AM PST by Clemenza (Gabba Gabba Hey!)
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To: madprof98

"And making marriage such a priority legitimates the notion that heterosexual-style union is the ideal"

Why yes! It would! And the problem with that is?


20 posted on 12/02/2004 12:01:17 PM PST by vabeachrepub
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