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Arafat To Die within Hours REALLY!!!!!
http://www.haaretzdaily.com ^

Posted on 11/09/2004 5:43:21 AM PST by ElisabethInCincy

15:28 Palestinian source: Arafat may have only hours to live (Reuters)


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: arafat; enjoyhell; hesnotdead; justpining4thefjords
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To: ElisabethInCincy

Well, according to a current Netscape report via Drudge, he's still dead, so who woulda thought?


81 posted on 11/09/2004 6:31:39 AM PST by izzatzo
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To: OXENinFLA
So what's the record on how many times a person has died ?
82 posted on 11/09/2004 6:59:03 AM PST by Mo1 (one country, one Constitution, and one future that binds us)
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To: Mo1

I think about 4 or 5 times....


83 posted on 11/09/2004 7:10:21 AM PST by OXENinFLA
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To: ElisabethInCincy

still waiting.....................................

looking for a flat line


dead


84 posted on 11/09/2004 7:12:14 AM PST by The Mayor (The fires of life will not destroy you if you're watered by the River of Life.)
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To: ElisabethInCincy

85 posted on 11/09/2004 7:14:00 AM PST by DocRock (If you have bandwidth, I have a lot of reference material on my homepage.)
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To: ElisabethInCincy
Does anybody know for how many virgins
he will have waiting on him?

??? X 72=______
86 posted on 11/09/2004 7:30:26 AM PST by WKB (3! ~ Psa. 12 8 The wicked freely strut about when what is vile is honored among men.")
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To: WKB

sure


87 posted on 11/09/2004 7:30:58 AM PST by WKB (3! ~ Psa. 12 8 The wicked freely strut about when what is vile is honored among men.")
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To: Lijahsbubbe; dennisw

These Palis are in denial over the obvious: ol' Arafatty's new metabolic default setting is fixed at room temperature... 3000 degress.

I imagine the ice deliveries are getting rather expensive.


88 posted on 11/09/2004 9:41:33 AM PST by Thinkin' Gal
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To: ElisabethInCincy

Well, it just so happens that your friend here is only mostly dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.

89 posted on 11/09/2004 11:00:54 AM PST by lsee
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To: Poohbah

Palestinian: Hello, I wish to register a complaint... Hello? Miss?
SHOPKEEPER: What do you mean, miss?
PALESTINIAN:: Oh, I'm sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint.
SHOPKEEPER: Sorry, we're closing for lunch.
PALESTINIAN:: Never mind that my lad, I wish to make a complain about this Arafat what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.
SHOPKEEPER: Oh yes, the Egyptian Palestinian. What's wrong with it?
PALESTINIAN:: I'll tell you what's wrong with it. It's dead, that's what wrong with it.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no it's resting, look!
PALESTINIAN:: Look my lad, I know a dead Arafat when I see one and I'm looking at one right now.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no sir, it's not dead. It's resting.
PALESTINIAN:: Resting?
SHOPKEEPER: Yeah, remarkable bird the Egyptian palestinian, beautiful plumage, innit?
PALESTINIAN:: The plumage don't enter to it - it's stone dead.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no - it's just resting.
PALESTINIAN:: All right then, if it's resting I'll wake it up. (shouts into Cage/Ramallah) Hello Yassar! I've got a nice Jew for you when you wake up, Yassar Arafat!
SHOPKEEPER: (jogging cage) There it moved.
PALESTINIAN:: No he didn't. That was you pushing the cage.
SHOPKEEPER: I did not.
PALESTINIAN:: Yes, you did. (takes Arafat out of cage, shouts) Hello Yassar, Yassar (bangs it against counter) Yassar Arafat, wake up. Yassar. (throws it in the air and lets it fall to the floor) Now that's what I call a dead Arafat.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no it's stunned.
PALESTINIAN:: Look my lad, I've had just enough of this. That Arafat is definitely deceased. And when I bought it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squawk.
SHOPKEEPER: It's probably pining for the Jews or Funding.
PALESTINIAN:: Pining for the Jews, what kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got home?
SHOPKEEPER: The Egyptian palestinian prefers kipping on its back. Beautiful bird, lovely plumage.
PALESTINIAN:: Look, I took the liberty of examining that Arafat, and I discovered that the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been nailed there.
SHOPKEEPER: Well of course it was nailed there. Otherwise it would muscle up to those bars and voom.
PALESTINIAN:: Look matey (picks up Arafat) this Arafat wouldn't voom if I put four thousand volts through it. It's bleeding demised.
SHOPKEEPER: It's not, it's pining.
PALESTINIAN:: It's not pining, it's passed on. This Arafat is no more. It has ceased to be. It's expired and gone to meet its maker. This is a late Arafat. It's a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn't nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies. It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-Arafat.
SHOPKEEPER: Well, I'd better replace it then.
PALESTINIAN:: (to camera) If you want to get anything done in this country you've got to complain till you're blue in the mouth.
SHOPKEEPER: Sorry guv, we're right out of Arafats.
PALESTINIAN:: I see. I see. I get the picture.
SHOPKEEPER: I've got another Palestinian official.
PALESTINIAN:: Does it talk?
SHOPKEEPER: Not really, no.
PALESTINIAN:: Well, it's scarcely a replacement, then is it?
SHOPKEEPER: Listen, I'll tell you what, (handing over a card) tell you what, if you go to my brother's pet shop in Ramallah he'll replace your Arafat for you.
PALESTINIAN:: Ramallah eh?
SHOPKEEPER: Yeah.
PALESTINIAN:: All right. He leaves, holding the Arafat.


90 posted on 11/10/2004 7:42:31 PM PST by profoundwisdom (monty python lives)
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To: Poohbah

Palestinian: Hello, I wish to register a complaint... Hello? Miss?
SHOPKEEPER: What do you mean, miss?
PALESTINIAN:: Oh, I'm sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint.
SHOPKEEPER: Sorry, we're closing for lunch.
PALESTINIAN:: Never mind that my lad, I wish to make a complain about this Arafat what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.
SHOPKEEPER: Oh yes, the Egyptian Palestinian. What's wrong with it?
PALESTINIAN:: I'll tell you what's wrong with it. It's dead, that's what wrong with it.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no it's resting, look!
PALESTINIAN:: Look my lad, I know a dead Arafat when I see one and I'm looking at one right now.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no sir, it's not dead. It's resting.
PALESTINIAN:: Resting?
SHOPKEEPER: Yeah, remarkable bird the Egyptian palestinian, beautiful plumage, innit?
PALESTINIAN:: The plumage don't enter to it - it's stone dead.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no - it's just resting.
PALESTINIAN:: All right then, if it's resting I'll wake it up. (shouts into Cage/Ramallah) Hello Yassar! I've got a nice Jew for you when you wake up, Yassar Arafat!
SHOPKEEPER: (jogging cage) There it moved.
PALESTINIAN:: No he didn't. That was you pushing the cage.
SHOPKEEPER: I did not.
PALESTINIAN:: Yes, you did. (takes Arafat out of cage, shouts) Hello Yassar, Yassar (bangs it against counter) Yassar Arafat, wake up. Yassar. (throws it in the air and lets it fall to the floor) Now that's what I call a dead Arafat.
SHOPKEEPER: No, no it's stunned.
PALESTINIAN:: Look my lad, I've had just enough of this. That Arafat is definitely deceased. And when I bought it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squawk.
SHOPKEEPER: It's probably pining for the Jews or Funding.
PALESTINIAN:: Pining for the Jews, what kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got home?
SHOPKEEPER: The Egyptian palestinian prefers kipping on its back. Beautiful bird, lovely plumage.
PALESTINIAN:: Look, I took the liberty of examining that Arafat, and I discovered that the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been nailed there.
SHOPKEEPER: Well of course it was nailed there. Otherwise it would muscle up to those bars and voom.
PALESTINIAN:: Look matey (picks up Arafat) this Arafat wouldn't voom if I put four thousand volts through it. It's bleeding demised.
SHOPKEEPER: It's not, it's pining.
PALESTINIAN:: It's not pining, it's passed on. This Arafat is no more. It has ceased to be. It's expired and gone to meet its maker. This is a late Arafat. It's a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn't nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies. It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-Arafat.
SHOPKEEPER: Well, I'd better replace it then.
PALESTINIAN:: (to camera) If you want to get anything done in this country you've got to complain till you're blue in the mouth.
SHOPKEEPER: Sorry guv, we're right out of Arafats.
PALESTINIAN:: I see. I see. I get the picture.
SHOPKEEPER: I've got another Palestinian official.
PALESTINIAN:: Does it talk?
SHOPKEEPER: Not really, no.
PALESTINIAN:: Well, it's scarcely a replacement, then is it?
SHOPKEEPER: Listen, I'll tell you what, (handing over a card) tell you what, if you go to my brother's pet shop in Ramallah he'll replace your Arafat for you.
PALESTINIAN:: Ramallah eh?
SHOPKEEPER: Yeah.
PALESTINIAN:: All right. He leaves, holding the Arafat.


91 posted on 11/10/2004 7:43:16 PM PST by profoundwisdom (monty python lives)
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To: bobsatwork

obviously they were waiting for his death to hit the same day as muhammad...coincidence they have been keeping him alive?


92 posted on 11/10/2004 7:47:44 PM PST by profoundwisdom (monty python lives)
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To: ElisabethInCincy
Ok guys, I'm gonna load up my HK, fly to France, just shoot the bastard, and get it over with.

Pics at 11


93 posted on 11/10/2004 7:51:42 PM PST by KoRn
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To: ElisabethInCincy

Whatever.... Ping me when he's really stone cold stiff as a board DEAD. The lying little terrorist can't even die right.


94 posted on 11/10/2004 7:54:48 PM PST by KSCITYBOY
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To: KSCITYBOY

Now announced on CBS Arafat dead.


95 posted on 11/10/2004 7:58:05 PM PST by spotbust1 (Gun control is when you use both hands.)
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To: All

I hope he is finally in hell.


96 posted on 11/10/2004 8:09:23 PM PST by Exit148 (Founder of the Loose Change Club. Every nickle and dime counts!!)
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