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Hello, Uranus? Got Any Room? (The Mark Morford Column We've All Been Waiting For)
San Francisco Chronicle ^
| Friday, November 5, 2004
| Mark Morford, Spends a great deal of time at Uranus
Posted on 11/05/2004 5:55:20 AM PST by presidio9
I said it, you said it, pretty much anyone with a brain larger than a grape or a soul more nimble than a rock said it maybe a thousand times over. And you probably weren't even all that drunk when you said it and maybe you were even a little more than half serious and maybe you said it just like this: If Bush somehow snags another election, if the unthinkable comes to pass and the Dubya neocon nightmare refuses to end, well, that's it. I'm outta here.
Done. Over. Gone. Moving away. To Canada. Or France. Latvia. Uranus. Anywhere, really, that doesn't have Bush as leader and that doesn't make me openly ashamed to be a citizen and that doesn't make me feel like a sickened disillusioned ulcerated outcast in my own happily divisive country every damn day including Sunday.
You want a place, you say, that doesn't right this minute seem to be working heroically to make homophobia and born-again fundamentalism and pre-emptive isolationist warmongering and environmental ignorance a national religion. A place where SUVs aren't considered minor deities and where gay people aren't loathed for wanting to slice a wedding cake and where brazen heavily narcotized denial in the face of a veritable mountain of presidential lies isn't the national pastime.
Tempting, isn't it? To just move away to a sunnier, clothing-optional utopia and wait for it all to be over, for the dark days to pass and the Shrub era to sink into the tar pits of history and the fog to finally lift?
After all, most all of us on the progressive Left feel we truly faced the dragon this election, and we put up a valiant fight and marshaled as potent an army of dissenters and intellectuals and moderates and liberal crusaders and feminists
(Excerpt) Read more at sfgate.com ...
TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Politics/Elections; War on Terror
KEYWORDS: adamandsteve; chocolatestarfish; hersheyhighway; hyperventilating; lamentationofwomen; mandatorybarfalert; mba
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To: presidio9
Tempting, isn't it? To just move away to a sunnier, clothing-optional utopia You don't know crap about Uranus. It's colder than hell there. Like 350 degrees BELOW ZERO. Trust me. You'll want to bring a sweater.
To: presidio9
Oh come on Miss Morford, we know you have a secret crush on President Bush, just admit it. The truth will set you free.
22
posted on
11/05/2004 6:08:45 AM PST
by
dfwgator
(It's sad that the news media treats Michael Jackson better than our military.)
To: Question Liberal Authority
"I said it, you said it, pretty much anyone with a brain larger than a grape or a soul more nimble than a rock said it maybe a thousand times over"
There's your party, Democrats. Black, vile hatred of anything remotely decent in this world.
23
posted on
11/05/2004 6:09:24 AM PST
by
L98Fiero
To: Question Liberal Authority
You'll want to bring a sweater. LOL! Thanks a lot, now my keyboard is floating in the coffee that just came out my nose....
LQ
To: Question Liberal Authority
isolationist warmongering?!? Now if that's not an oxymoron than I don't know what is.
25
posted on
11/05/2004 6:09:50 AM PST
by
dfwgator
(It's sad that the news media treats Michael Jackson better than our military.)
To: Pukin Dog
Mark Morford, coming soon to Uranus!
26
posted on
11/05/2004 6:10:43 AM PST
by
SlowBoat407
("Don't bother giving me liberty: I'll take it for myself, thanks.")
To: presidio9
The bottom line: Don't disband the newfound army just because one ugly battle was lost. Mourn, commiserate, lick wounds, lick each other, drink heavily.... And then they don't understand why they lose.
While they lick each other and drink heavily, we will be figuring out how to take back Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Minnesota and Michigan.
Nancy Pelosi says they have lost all that they can lose. Sweetheart, I got news for you. This isn't even close to our high water mark.
27
posted on
11/05/2004 6:10:48 AM PST
by
massadvj
To: presidio9
I can just envision a dialogue between a couple of San Francisco gays:
Richard: That does it, Bruce. With Bush getting another four years, we'll never be able to get married. I'm moving to Uranus!
Bruce: Silly ... you'll have to evict the gerbils first!
28
posted on
11/05/2004 6:11:27 AM PST
by
Mr Ramsbotham
("Ich glaube, du hast in die hosen geschissen!")
To: presidio9
You cannot leave. You cannot drop the armor now. Why? Because you are needed, more than ever. You are mandatory to keep the energy flowing, the karmic vibrator buzzingI always imagine Miss Morford posing something like this, during her wetter, more bosomy screeds:
![](http://us.ent4.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/paramount_pictures/south_park__bigger__longer___uncut/big_gay_al/al.jpg)
:)
29
posted on
11/05/2004 6:12:01 AM PST
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
(I feel more and more like a revolted Charlton Heston, witnessing ape society for the very first time)
To: presidio9
Given the overwhelming obsession with sex, profanity and Godlessness this vile man exhibits, I am profoundly disgusted that any major news outlet in this country would let him on staff. He is a foul wretch, and it scares the heck out of me to think that such morally bankrupt, openly hedonistic and Godless people live in this country and openly espouse such views.
God save us, because even after a serious defeat such as they just endured this kind of people never, NEVER give up. They come back, with a vengeance. It might be four years, or ten or twenty, or maybe even fifty, but they always do, and rarely are the good people as motivated and ready to fight back then as these wicked people are to fight them. God save us; they'll be back.
To: Unam Sanctam
Here's what everyone who's right now on the brink of packing their bags and checking the real estate prices in Vancouver has to know and has to have drilled into their disconsolate hope-crushed souls right this minute, before it's too late: VANCOUVER??? Oh, yeah. Great choice. Lots of clothing optional beaches there.
To: presidio9
make me feel like a sickened disillusioned ulcerated outcast STDs will do that to a person.
To: Constitution Day; Slings and Arrows; MikalM; Fierce Allegiance; TheBigB; martin_fierro; ...
![](http://mann.uthscsa.edu/images/nelson.gif)
Morford Ping (it's getting better all the time...)
33
posted on
11/05/2004 6:14:17 AM PST
by
presidio9
(Islam is as Islam does)
To: presidio9
You cannot leave. You cannot drop the armor now. Why? Because you are needed, more than ever. You are mandatory to keep the energy flowing, the karmic vibrator buzzing... How can these guys be out of touch with middle America with statements like this???
34
posted on
11/05/2004 6:14:20 AM PST
by
trashcanbred
(Anti-social and anti-socialist)
To: presidio9
Hello, Uranus? Got Any Room? I thought I'd never see the most popular bathhouse pickup line used as a headline in a major paper.
35
posted on
11/05/2004 6:14:25 AM PST
by
dirtboy
(Tagline temporarily out of commission due to excessive intake of gin-soaked raisins)
To: Vic3O3; cavtrooper21
More rantings from Morford..... It's a wonder he can even form a reasonable sentence.
Semper Fi
36
posted on
11/05/2004 6:14:37 AM PST
by
dd5339
(A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the hero's path.)
To: presidio9
Reading his article gave me a vision of someone stabbing his or her forehead with a fork repeatedly and yet complaining about the pain.
To: presidio9
I wish that they would stop threatening and actually do it!
38
posted on
11/05/2004 6:14:42 AM PST
by
socialismisinsidious
("A government that is big enough to give you all you want is big enough to take it all away.")
To: presidio9
I have alway considered myself a Christian, but in no way would I call myself a "charismatic". So, when it came to demonic possession and the like, I would call myself a skeptic to say the least. After reading this "vomit", I may have to change my thinking on demonic possession. This guys disdain for all that is righteous is obviously spiritual in nature. How else could anyone contain such hatred and vile for a descent and compassionate man like George Bush? I mean I think President is too meek at times. I had disdain for Bill Clinton, but never to this degree.
To: presidio9
You said you'd leave so leave you self righteous prick.
40
posted on
11/05/2004 6:15:58 AM PST
by
Bikers4Bush
(Flood waters rising, heading for more conservative ground. Vote for true conservatives!)
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