Posted on 10/08/2004 6:34:14 AM PDT by GOP_Muzik
I'm tired of losing my Bush/Cheney yard sign
After serious thought and a phone call to my lawyer, I pulled the fish hook laden sign. I was angry because the last person who stole it hid the metal frame's vertical pieces in my grass so I would hit them with my lawn mower...which I did but luckily wasn't hurt.
When I was aerating my yard yesterday, my ankle was shredded by a bramble..for those who don't live in the south these are vines with thousands of razor-sharp thorns near the base that grow like crazy down here. Well, a light bulb went off in my head.
If you look at the picture, the vine is clearly visable because of the shade, but at night you can't see it at all. In fact, my wife walked right up to it in daylight and couldn't see it until she was 1 foot away.
I can't get sued for this, you can get caught on one of these in your own backyard, plus I planted it in the ground, so maybe it just grew around the sign. Actually I used 2 of them and planted them on each side and used twisty-ties to secure it. Notice I left the 20 gauge wire welded to the frame and attached it to a tree.
There is also a dye pack taped inside that will ooze slowly when placed horizontal. It consists of permanant red ink, flour, cayenne pepper, capsicum oil, and 30w transmission oil.
Let's just hope the cowards return to steal this one.
I know I'm obsessing over a silly sign, but I was really peeved
Too bad you can't set up an ambush at night and deliver a good beating. Still, try to get them on videotape and hit them with a trespassing and vandalism charge.
If I had the time I would. My wife is already threatening to have me committed for going this far.
This should be amusing. Waiting for a report on Monday.
Just set up the camera with an 8 hour tape, hidden in a window, before you hit the sack. Make sure there is a little illumination out there but not much.
This is great - helping the environment and helping Bush. Good thinking! Set up an motion cam with night vision video recorder if you have some money/time to burn...
plant some landmines around the sign :^D about 2am while your sleeping you will we awaken to the sweet sound of a troll getting his @ss blown up! HEHEHEHE!
You know, it occurred to me yesterday that it would probably be rather simple (for someone smarter than me) to rig up one of those motion sensors that turn on outdoor lights for a custom use. Hook the motion sensor up to your sprinkler system, which just happens to be surrounding the area when someone approaches your yard sign(s). [grin]
Hot glue some red snapper poly-tape high voltage twine to the sign edges. Connect it to a battery operated high voltage livestock fencer. If they touch it, POW! The same method works for male dogs who piss on your tires or shrubs.
Good job - keep us informed as the sign war progresses.
Tape a note to the sign that says "By stealing this sign you are guaranteeing another $10 donation to the RNC, Thanks for your contribution"
We need to get yard signs that say: My other Bush Cheney sign was stolen by a tolerant and diverse Kerry lover.
Hopefully if someone attempts to run over the sign, their tires will be punctured. I hope I am awake if it does occur.
It is getting tense. I get the finger shot at me almost every morning on the way to work because of my W04 bumper sticker.
Now had it been me, I would have wired 110 to the sign and installed a small light to illuminate it at night.
Funny thing is, I don't do to well at wiring projects so the possibility a open circuit could happen is high, and by grabbing the sign one could become the actual circuit to ground. Lawns at night tend to draw condensation which allows for a great electrical connection. :)
If you really want to kick them in the nuts, put a note on the back of the sign saying, "Theft of this sign will result in an extra $20 being donated to the Republican Party. Thank you for helping support BC04."
Another trick is white paint -- the very very slow drying kind , it's sold in tubes, like grease -- or you could use white grease too. Carefully edge the sign with it -- can't be seen at night.
I would put one of those battery operated alarms on the sign.
I just saw them on TV and you get about 10 for $10-20.
It is two parts. You stick the metal piece on the sign and the alarm/sensor near it on the ground. Someone who pulls the sign out of the ground will set off the alarm.
That is hilarious!
Do keep us posted.
What would happen if you wet the poster with pepper spray and let it dry. Would there still be a pepper effect if someone got it on their hands and then rubbed their eyes later? Just curious....
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