Sex, Guys and Fruit Flies

miamiherald ^ | Oct. 3, 2004 | Dave Barry

[ScuzzyTerminator]

I'm amazed that we're still allowed to call them Fruit Flies. Sounds very not-PC.

[codyjacksmom]

LOL...Too funny!

[JSteff]

"about twice the number of brain cells required to cast a vote on *American Idol*"

Or a presidential election.

[NicknamedBob]

"Tonight, I will vibrate my wings. "

Butterfly kisses are a good way to start.

[lakey]

shhhh - somebody will notice.

[Watery Tart]

(...I assume it's Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Babe, by the late Barry White).

Sssshhhhh!! That's it !! Dave has discovered the secret !!

[Tamzee]

which causes the females to become turned off and develop little fly headaches.

Only Dave Barry could come up with a line like that LOL

Thanks for the post, too funny :-)

[Razz Barry]

Dave's a born genius.

[Ruth A.]

I needed a laugh today. Thanks.

[newzjunkey]

Oh that is a sick, sick, sick song. I'm going to wretch now.

[NicknamedBob]

I've heard the song, but I didn't have your reaction. Could there be another song?

However, I was not referring to the song, but rather to the process.

To give someone a butterfly kiss is to put your eye very close to someone's cheek, (or other body part), and flutter the eyelid, as if a butterfly's wing were making contact.

It is a gentle, and tender blessing. Certainly not sick in my mind.

[NicknamedBob]

P.S. -- "I'm going to wretch now."

wretch (rèch) noun
1. A miserable, unfortunate, or unhappy person.
2. A person regarded as base, mean, or despicable: "a stony adversary, an inhuman wretch" (Shakespeare).
[Middle English wrecche, from Old English wrecca, exile, wretch.]

retch (rèch) verb
retched, retching, retches verb, intransitive
To try to vomit.
verb, transitive
To vomit.
[Alteration of Middle English rechen, from Old English hræcan.]
- retch noun


No wretched excess, if you please!!

[NicknamedBob]

Butterfly Kisses, the song...

http://www.prolife.com/bob.carlisle.htm

[mewzilla]

Help me, help me!!!

[NicknamedBob]

Sorry, that is no Drosophila melanogaster, that is a common Musca domestica.

[NicknamedBob]

A common complaint among fruit flies...

"I hate taking pictures. I always get red-eye!"

[mewzilla]

Gezhundheit!

[NicknamedBob]

The spell check can show you how to spell that.

I have to use an encyclopedia for my words!

Scientific names can be strange, with long names given to very small animals. Just for fun, I decided to look up the largest animal, to see if it was called Moby, or something.

blue whale noun
A very large whalebone whale (Sibbaldus musculus) having a bluish-gray back, yellow underparts, and several ventral throat grooves. It is considered the largest living animal, sometimes reaching a length of 30.5 meters (100 feet). Also called sulphur-bottom.

I found something funny, anyway. I misread this...
"...having a bluish-gray back, yellow underpants, ..."