Posted on 08/31/2004 5:09:43 AM PDT by islander-11
You're John Kerry [related, bio], and the only liberal puke who's had a worse August than you is William Kennedy Smith.
They said it was your election to lose, and you're losing it.
You told 'em you were no Dukakis and you're not. As the Bush campaign pulverized him in August 1988, the Duke ran away to Tanglewood. Sixteen years later, you haven't fled to Tanglewood, you've lammed out for Nantucket.
And now you're holed up in the $9 million mansion on Hulbert Avenue that your second wife's first husband's trust fund bought.
You're John Kerry, and you can't help yourself. Somewhere today you'll just have to cut in some line somewhere and inquire of some poor wage slave, ``Do you know who I am?'' Yes, Senator, you're the narcissistic fop who's blowing the election.
You're John Kerry, and where will Lovey's billion-dollar trust fund treat you to dinner? Perhaps the Chanticleer in Sconset, or do you prefer The Galley on Cliffside Beach?
You're John Kerry, and you're a man of the people. People who are willing to spend $150 on dinner for two, if you don't want any wine.
If only you could sit down with the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth, perhaps at Topper's Restaurant at the Wauwinet Inn. If you could just break baguette with them and then partake of a simple three-course dinner. It's one of the best buys on the island, only $78 per person, not including wine. In such a modest eatery, surely you could reason with them.
You're John Kerry, and you could order the food for them: for an appetizer, the poached Hudson Valley foie gras with black mission fig preserve and Portuguese bread. On top of the $78, there's a ``$5 supplement'' for that, and another ``$8 supplement'' if you go for the poached Nantucket lobster navarin.
``O'Neill,'' you could say to the head Swift Boat vet, ``why am I not connecting with the voters? I like all the same things they do - hang-gliding, $35 million Gulfstream jets, ski chalets in Sun Valley . . .''
You're John Kerry, and after a hard day of riding your $8,000 Serotta bike, you owe yourself a big feed, and may I recommend one of our favorites here at Topper's?
Go for the grilled Peking Duck breast and confit with quinoa, tot soi and ginger-peach chutney.
Dead duck, Senator. It's always in season for liberal Massachusetts snots running for president. Not lame duck, but dead duck.
Thanks for posting! I'm glad I can get a dose of the "Fat Boy" everyday! VB sucks though.
It's killer.
This is just too good.
There is no one in the whole of New England who says it like Howie Carr.
Best writer, Best Radio host, Best political activist in the world.
Howie says it like it is, Always!
There is no one in the whole of New England who says it like Howie Carr.
Best writer, Best Radio host, Best political activist in the world.
Howie says it like it is, Always!
"Lovey... now's probably not the best time to mention this, darling... but: last night: I let Michael Moore give me a 'private screening,' if you know what I mean..."
I heard his show yesterday, and it's good to have him back by the way, and it was great. He sure did a job on Kerry and that high brow restaurant he eats at.
You just can't replace Howie.. he can really get down and tell it like it is.
I think five adjectives might be a record for pretentiousness. That's worse than most of the California restaurants I've seen. "Grilled Wolf Neck" might be an interesting entree at Ted Nugent's next barbeque, though. ;)
LOL, what a great read to start the last day of August, 2004.
I don't know. I always preferred Jay Severin to Howie. Howie lost me when he started having contests with his stupid Interns. There'd be something hot going on and he's spends the afternoon asking some bimbo he hired who's buried in Grants Tomb.
That's the perspective that Americans have of Kerry. He could never really pull out one of those "I feel your pain" moments.
Amen to that. Howie though, he just has too much fun. You can HEAR his smile.
Much the same thing has happened to St. Simons Island here in GA, just not on the same scale as your island . . . neighboring Sea Island of course was ALWAYS that way, but it was more or less uninhabited before the millionaires got hold of it.
Why does it seem like the more money these people acquire, the less class they have?
Whatcha do? Fishing? Tradesman? Or, God forbid, Lawyer? ;^>
When I went to school up in Wellesley (Babson) I had family and friends in the area who used to live all over the Mass and RI coasts and some even out on the Island. I learned that it was a great way of life outside of tourist season. Hard, particularly for the fishermen (mostly folks I knew out of Gloucester) but they all maintained it was well worth it. Of course, that was 30 years ago, so I imagine it's changed some.
Wasn't Jaws filmed right around your area? You can always hope that Bruce will show up when John Boy is out trying to wind surf.
I'd like to brag that Laurie Dhue and Howie Carr both graduated from the University of NORTH CAROLINA at Chapel Hill, NC...the most liberal part of the state, but THEY didn't drink the kool-aid there!!! (Paul Welstone did, unfortunately.)
That column was brilliant.
Never thought anyone could out Anne Coulter Anne Coulter but Howie has done it.
Thank for the post.
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