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How to increase attendence at the Olimpics
Vanity | 8-24-2004 | Me

Posted on 08/25/2004 4:53:46 AM PDT by Cowman

How to save the Olimpics

I was thinking about the Olimpics the other day and about how to make things more efficient and more entertaining. If you watch the stands rather than the "action" you will see more empty seats than occupied seats. I propse that we combine events to get the activities over with in half the time and would make things more interesting. Here are my suggestions.

Javelin throw and Pole vault: The javelin would be thrown at the pole vaulter who would catch it and then use the javelin to vault the pole.

Skeet shooting and high diving -- self explained

Bicycle racing and fencing: Speeding around the track whilst thrusting and parrying.

Hammer throw, Gymnastics and long jump: The gymnast will be thrown by the hammer thrower -- while in mid air he would go through his routine and distance thrown would qualify for the long jump. (diving could also be included if he were thrown into a swimming pool.)

Any others?


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: humor; olimpics
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Have fun
1 posted on 08/25/2004 4:53:47 AM PDT by Cowman
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To: Cowman

You'd better get ready for the javelin throwing; it's spelled Olympics.


2 posted on 08/25/2004 4:58:26 AM PDT by xJones
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To: xJones

Spell check is fir sissies


3 posted on 08/25/2004 4:59:57 AM PDT by Cowman
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To: xJones

I think it might be intended... O-"limp"-ics...


4 posted on 08/25/2004 5:01:10 AM PDT by thoughtomator (antidisestablishment libertarian)
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To: Cowman

The phrase "build it and they will come" doesn't seem to apply to Athens.


5 posted on 08/25/2004 5:02:16 AM PDT by HisKingdomWillAbolishSinDeath (Cream rises to the top, but in a secular culture, so does the slime.)
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To: Cowman

6 posted on 08/25/2004 5:02:29 AM PDT by Zavien Doombringer (I am not late for Zots, I have stealth Zot capability.....)
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To: thoughtomator; Cowman

I considered that, but it's wise to put intentional play on words in quotes like: 'Olimpics'.


7 posted on 08/25/2004 5:03:41 AM PDT by xJones
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To: Cowman

Did you use your spelcheker? I olways use mine


8 posted on 08/25/2004 5:06:15 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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To: Cowman

Forget the Olimpics, they can't even get people to go to the Olympics.


9 posted on 08/25/2004 5:08:06 AM PDT by PBRSTREETGANG
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To: Cowman

Beach volleyball with shotput?


10 posted on 08/25/2004 5:08:42 AM PDT by mewzilla
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To: Cowman
How to increase attendence at the Olimpics

Funny stuff.

Seriously, I think they made a grave miscalcuation by changing the Olympics to every two years. Having it every 4 years made it more "rare" (in a sense) and more interesting. I no longer watch it and that is the biggest reason--at this point it's just another sports event.

11 posted on 08/25/2004 5:09:38 AM PDT by The Toad
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To: Cowman; Admin Moderator

FReepers look stupid when we can't even write a headline correctly. Please fix it.


12 posted on 08/25/2004 5:12:19 AM PDT by ValerieUSA
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To: mewzilla

Womens' Beach Vollyball. More Womens' Beach Vollyball. Womens' Beach Vollyball...24/7. And a longer season. And STOP chastizing the cameramen over the wedgie-shots.


13 posted on 08/25/2004 5:16:00 AM PDT by dasboot (<img src="XXX">)
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To: dasboot
I'm still trying to figure out how anyone can play a sport while sporting a wedgie.
14 posted on 08/25/2004 5:17:23 AM PDT by mewzilla
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To: mewzilla
Beach volleyball is already combined with something. I don't think it's an olympic sport though...


15 posted on 08/25/2004 5:20:18 AM PDT by Hatteras
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To: Cowman

They should use cardboard cuttouts of people like they do in movies for crowd shots. Add a sound track with cheers and boos, and there you go.


16 posted on 08/25/2004 5:21:44 AM PDT by NavyCanDo
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To: Hatteras

Sigh. Guess it's a guy thing. I tuned in to see what the male volleyball players were wearing, and it was a darn sight more than that. Go figure.


17 posted on 08/25/2004 5:24:03 AM PDT by mewzilla
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To: mewzilla

RIGHT! The gals should be required to perform in the attire of ancient Greek Olimpick tradition.
(And howbout the Belloruskian bombshell who won the 100m!!! Hominahomina...I'm diggin' this Olimpiad!)


18 posted on 08/25/2004 5:25:15 AM PDT by dasboot (<img src="XXX">)
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To: Cowman

My local paper already suggested replacing fencing with swordfighting. Bonus points for piratey costumes. Me, I would prefer broadsword to fencing, though.


19 posted on 08/25/2004 5:25:38 AM PDT by Fudd (Facts are to Liberals as salt is to slugs)
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To: Cowman

Free beer for anybody who actually watches that crap.


20 posted on 08/25/2004 5:29:32 AM PDT by Undertow ("I have found some kind of temporary sanity...")
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