Posted on 07/27/2004 3:47:47 PM PDT by UnklGene
Perspective from Another Planet - A Strange Take on Stay-at-Home Moms
Note: This commentary was delivered by Prison Fellowship President Mark Earley.
Gretchen Ritter, a women's studies professor at the University of Texas, has a problem with stay-at-home moms—actually, several problems. Stay-at-home motherhood, she explains, is bad for men, women, and children alike. It damages our society as a whole and makes lesbian mothers feel bad.
Ritter made all these charges in an opinion piece titled, "The messages we send when moms stay home," published in the Austin American-Statesman. The diatribe was her attempt at starting what she called "an honest conversation about what is lost when women stay home." Just read her own words on the harm caused by stay-at-home moms, because no words of mine can do full justice to her ideas (as they say, folks, you just can't make this stuff up):
"[Stay-at-home motherhood] denies men the chance to be involved fathers. …
"Women who stay at home … lose a chance to contribute as professionals and community activists. …
"Full-time mothering is also bad for children. It teaches them that the world is divided by gender. …
"The new stay-at-home motherhood movement parallels the movement to create the 'perfect' child. It's not just that mothers are home with their children; they are engaged with their children constantly so they will 'develop' properly. Many middle-class parents demand too much of their children. …
"The stay-at-home mother movement is bad for society. It tells employers that women who marry and have children are at risk of withdrawing from their careers. … "
And finally, "The more stay-at-home mothers there are, the more schools and libraries will neglect the needs of working parents, and the more professional mothers, single mothers, working-class mothers, and [yes,] lesbian mothers will feel judged."
I'm not sure where Ritter is coming from. I don't know whether her own mother worked, or whether she has kids of her own. And since she doesn't provide any data to back up her ideas, I have no idea where she's getting them. All I know is that she writes like someone who lives on a planet of her own—perhaps a planet where test tubes and incubators do the messy, complicated job of raising children. I would think that only someone with that perspective could believe stay-at-home moms deny their husbands opportunities to be with the kids, or that consistent engagement with one's children will scar them for life. So far, my six children appear to be doing just fine despite—or could it be because of?—the fact that their mother is at home for them every day, and I am engaged.
Fortunately, a number of our readers, including one of our own Centurions, wrote letters to the editor rebutting Ritter's statements, citing both academic studies and their own experience. That's what we should do whenever a piece like this gets published. Maybe some stay-at-home moms can op-ed pieces for their local papers as well.
You know, it's tempting just to disregard these loony ideas, but this article was written by a professor at a major university and published in a mainstream newspaper. We can't take it for granted that everyone will disagree with her. Our job as Christians is to go on the offensive and actively but winsomely promote a worldview that makes sense and really works. Anyone out there got a few minutes to write the Austin American-Statesman on behalf of stay-at-home moms and common sense? I hope so.
And as for believing the content of such poppycock boxes, well, ... sheesh.
Can we have her imprisoned as soon as possible before she gets somebody hurt?!
I have this article on my refrigerator. Everyone that comes by and reads it thinks it's a joke. Sadly, the moron professor is serious!
Along with this hilarious bit, the rest of the article is too funny to read without laughing. What a looney-tune.
FMCDH(BITS)
University of Texas professor. I'm embarrassed!
As a former stay at home mom, I can assure this idiot writer that I did not only the HARDEST job in the world, but also the most grossly underpaid job...
Yeesh, I know men who would not have lasted a day in my house when I had 3 kids in diapers...
what an insult to me, and to stay at home moms everywhere
Well obviously, when was the last time anyone saw a man give birth to a child.
There is only one way to stop this nonsense. We have to attack tenure in universities. Idiots like this woman should never have jobs at a publicly-funded school. Parents who send their children to the University of Texas should be demanding this dingbat be fired immediately for attempting to undermine the most fundamental and worthwhile role of a woman in society - to raise her children.
anyone who knows an alumni from here should email them
this so they don't give any money to morons like this
Now, this is scary!!!
Dear folks who want political change in this country Would you
like to help register likely Demcratic voters in swing states? I'm
looking for 4-6 people to join a small letter-writing party this
Thursday (July 29), using data provided by Mainstreet Moms
Oppose Bush (www.themmob.com)
We'll write letters encouraging single moms in Ohio to vote for
change, and we'll send voter registration forms. I'll provide some
letters that you can personalize, or you can compose your own.
She hasnt' a clue that the culture has evolved beyond her mindset. Most kids, IMHO, of this day and age; don't see a gender "division" when mommy stays home -- they are glad a parent is at home with them. Furthermore, daughters of these "stay at home moms" have much more time to consider what careers they'd like to go into, and with Mommy (or Daddy) right there to ask all the right questions, and to carefully weigh the arguments with the growing young adult.
I have many, many things to say about this. I swear to God, I cannot type them without swearing up a storm. You take it from there.
However, let's cut to the chase of this Professor's verbiage: she's pro-tax. Meaning, the more women work, the more taxes get collected. Professor doesn't say squat about the majority of DAY CARE WORKERS -- WHO ARE PREDOMINANTLY FEMALE -- these workers get a pass and because the feminist agenda is about MONEY.
There are so many problems with her thesis I won't dare attempt to list them all. But I will mention one thing that irks me about people like her: collectivism.
The feminist movement was origially all about women being able to make thier own decisions and direct their own lives as each individual woman sees fit. Whether that means being an 7-11 clerk, an astronaut, a schoolteacher or a mother ... makes no difference. It's up to the individual to decide.
Each person on the planet is a unique INDIVIDUAL with unique talents, abilities, aspirations, etc.
What women like the author of this piece are proposing is that women should be herded (like sheep) in one direction and to deny individual free choice. This is the exact opposite of what feminism was originally about and what it should still be about.
Women are unique individual human beings, not sheep or cattle, and we do not need to have others (especially other women) telling us what we "should" and "should not" be doing with our lives.
Incidently, the same is true of people collectively telling women they belong at home raising children. She is no better than these kind of people.
Collectivists are evil.
My husband's ex-wife told him that I was a poor role model for their daughters because I'm a stay-at-home Mom and she's a bank vice president. What she didn't consider was that while she was busy climbing the banking ladder, I was taking care of her children, as well as my own. And I tried to give them the love and attention that they so desparately wanted from their mother.
Vermont is moving towards mandatory state indoctrination of children from birth. Already there are those here who say parents raising their own children are "abusing" them.
Ack! Why didn't you ping me here????? :-).
Yeah, what she said!!!!!
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