Posted on 07/21/2004 6:23:32 AM PDT by nuconvert
Suggested Speakers for the Dems' Convention
Marianne M. Jennings
July 21, 2004/
http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | John Kerry is a dead man. Not inviting Hillary Clinton to speak, and then flip-flopping to have her introduce William Jefferson was a faux pas of Marie Antoinette proportions. Hell hath no fury like a pant-suited former first lady relegated to introducing her eight-timing (Pacific Time) husband. John Edwards, Kerry's new gravitas running mate, and former Partridge Family member, must have had his trial-lawyer-punitive-punishment-feelers on hiatus.
Where was Kerry's mind and what was he thinking? Perhaps Mr. Kerry wanted to distance himself from the Clintons. Perhaps he feared Sen. Clinton would steal his spotlight. Perhaps Mr. Kerry lacks good judgment. That deficit is genetic in liberals and Dems. Indeed, Mr. Kerry slighted more than Mrs. Clinton. He overlooked some of the Dems' brightest stars:
Michael Newdow. Dr. Newdow should be first up at the convention to lead the gang in the Pledge, sans "under G-d." This atheist attorney/physician, who hauled his young daughter's privacy into court to challenge that pledge, is smarting from his U.S. Supreme Court loss. The justices sent him packing when they realized he didn't even have custody of his daughter.
Ellen Johnson. Executive director of one of Newdow's favorite groups: the Godless Americans Political Action Committee (GAMPAC), a group that endorsed Kerry and Edwards last week. Visit them at www.godlessamericans.org . Johnson could deliver a barn burner with statements such as the Kerry-Edwards slate being "the best alternative to four more years of George Bush and Pat Robertson running the country." GAMPAC's website features this report from USA Today, "Voters who say they go to church every week usually vote for Republicans. Those who go to church less often or not at all tend to vote Democratic." Damn those churches!
Martha Stewart. Frequent White House guest during the Clinton years. Contributor of $100,000 of soft money to the Democrats in 2002 alone. Convicted felon who could repeat the amazing oration she offered on the court house steps following her sentencing, a diatribe the New York Times did not publish, "Perhaps all of you out there can continue to show your support by subscribing to our magazine, by buying our products, by encouraging our advertisers to come back in full-force." Or, her plea to the judge, "What was a small personal matter . . . became an almost fatal circus . . . of unprecedented proportions . . " Note to Kerry: Put Martha on a different night from Mr. Clinton — repetitious!
Jack Grubman. The weasel financial analyst, who touted WorldCom even as it was restating its books, $9 billion downward, gave Democrats $125,000 in soft money in 2000 and 2002.
Haim Saban: The country's largest contributor to any party or candidate, including $3,000,000 to the DNC and $7,000,000 for its building fund. Mr. Saban, founder of the Power Rangers, supported Kerry during his Senate campaigns. He and other Sabans with the same address gave to both Clintons, Gore, Kennedy, Daschle, Dancer, Prancer and every other clown in the Senate. He could give some background on his Saban Center for Middle East Policy of the Brookings Institution. Why so many Center speakers from and events on Palestine? Why the "Iraq is going poorly" view of his Center? And how come Saban scholars are publishing in Salon.com?
(Excerpt) Read more at jewishworldreview.com ...
And, Sandy Berger, to address the issue of protecting national secrets and security.
Linda Ronstadt will sing "_____ Bless America"
Well NAMBLA has endorsed Kerry, so Kerry should have some high-profile pedophile to speak. Certainly a pro-terrorist speaker should have been invited, I know Osama felt a bit snubbed. Maybe inviting Chirac would help there.
Hillary will introduce Bill? I din't know that. I do see why, though...that way they will BOTH stand there in front of all the adoring fans. Just Like Old Times. The applause will surely last forever.
"that way they will BOTH stand there in front of all the adoring fans. Just Like Old Times"
You Got It.
They could get someone to channel Madeline Murray Ohare in from hell!
Hilarious...
Sad (for LR)... but really funny; Thanks
Marc Rich will outline the Party's plan for increased economic ties with the EU in his new role as Secretary of Commerce.
Fidel Castro will do a stem-winder speech titled: "The Glowing Future of Progressive Politics in the Americas."
Mike Gorbachev, in his new role as International Environmental Messiah, will deliver a stirring speech titled "A New Green Future Under UN Guidance."
And so on.
When convention-goers are about half asleep from the soporific speeches by Jennings' nominees, Kate Michelman and Kim Grandy will wake them up with a ten-minute abortion-mantra chant: "My body, my choice! My body, my choice! . . ."
LOL! You nailed it.
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