Parents pay for juveniles' incarceration

Virginian Piloet ^ | 5/1/04 | AMY JETER

[wagglebee]

After her adopted son returned from a juvenile correctional center two Christmases ago, Lillie Wilbourn tried to keep him out of trouble.

She paid someone to drive him to and from school. She locked the door at home, so he couldn’t stay there during the day when he should have been in class. She tried to get him a job.

But in November, a juvenile court judge in Portsmouth ruled that the teenager had violated his parole because he wasn’t attending school, wasn’t looking for a job and wasn’t keeping his curfew. The 17-year-old was committed to the state Department of Juvenile Justice for up to a year.

Last month, Wilbourn received a notice that is going to more parents in Virginia. The state’s Child Support Enforcement office informed her that she would be required to help pay for her son’s time in custody.

[MegaSilver]

I have a better idea: put the kid in stocks for a couple of days, or beat him, then let him go.

[TheSpottedOwl]

A law that took effect last summer made the process easier for the state, and as a result, parents increasingly are being forced to pay when their children are sent away. Even parents who are the victims of their children’s crimes can be required to pay.

Ping for your info Roger.

I've had to pay for court costs due to a fireworks possession arrest for my son, who was 14 at the time. I also paid for the privilege of enrolling him in community service. The second time I went around with this was for a fight last year. My son is now on home studies.

It's kind of funny, but he did his time at a nursing home. He did both turns at community service there, and the director told me that he could have a part time job there any time he wanted one.

I feel bad for this woman in the story. She did her best to be a good, responsible parent. I know how it goes. I can't be away from the house longer than it takes to run to the grocery store when the kids are home. So much for FReeping :-(

[TheSpottedOwl]

If we were allowed to use corporal punishment, we could cut down on juvenile deliquency before it starts. Of course that's child abuse, and they'll get you for that.

[annyokie]

This is wrong. The parents did what they could do.

[MegaSilver]

Dang; that sucks. He had to do community service and you had to pay for it?

In any event, I honestly don't think juvenille halls are good correctional facilities for young people. Community service would be much better, or just putting them in stocks or something. Even a light public whipping might not be too bad.

The purpose of jail, though, should be to lock up people who have, through serious criminal disruptions (major theft, fraud, assault, murder, treason, rape, etc.) proven themselves unable to function in society.

[Conservababe]

I prayed for the day my son was eighteen and I would not be responsible for him and his actions any longer. I feel empathy for this mother.

[tiamat]

That's rough and I'm sorry.

You can be the best parent in the world, but the kid has Free Will, and some just choose to go bad.

[annyokie]

You do your best. You can't help how the kids turn out.

[tiamat]

Conservababe wrote:

I prayed for the day my son was eighteen and I would not be responsible for him and his actions any longer. I feel empathy for this mother.

---

So do I.

Makes me feel SO lucky to have my little Caitlin!

[mlmr]

This kid was adopted, God knows at what age. Lot of older adopted children come with a bag of problems.

[tiamat]

Very true!

It's heart breaking.

[XBob]

2 - "I have a better idea: put the kid in stocks for a couple of days"

An excellent idea, particularly if in 'public'. The punishment would impact the offender, and humiliate him.

It would drastically cut the crime rate.

[TheSpottedOwl]

Yep, sure did have to pay. On the bright side, he can get a good job reference from that nursing home.

I'll tell you a story. The last time my son did CS, there was a girl there, also on CS, who was asked to speak up louder when calling the bingo numbers. This little cholla witch cussed out the woman, so my boy went over and took her place. He and his sisters have spent 3 years of long hours in nursing homes and hospitals visiting their grandma. So he knows.

Discipline begins in the home. When we are prevented from doing what we're supposed to do, this the end result. My son is slowly maturing, but still has his anger management issues. Kids shouldn't be arrested for fireworks, or fistfights that don't result in injury. Make them scrub out all the school trash cans, or something.

[TaxPayer2000]

Fortunately I keep a running "tab" for my daughter for just such an emergency. If ever she decides to sue me for bad parenting, then I will hand her the bill.

[Dacus943]

"I have a better idea: put the kid in stocks for a couple of days, or beat him, then let him go."

MegaSilver, I have to agree with you on the beating part.

How many offenders would never set foot back in court if as "part" of their first time punishment was thick plank of wood slapped REALLY hard about 20 times on their bare bottom!

This crap about thugs appearing 30 plus time before the courts would be a thing of the past!

[AEMILIUS PAULUS]

Note how governments are increasingly billing for their acts even though we pay taxes to support their various functions. 1776?

[TheSpottedOwl]

I pray for that myself. My son is trying to behave...I can see that he tries. However he has no impulse control. I'm done with the drugs, because he was on Paxil when he was busted for fireworks and fighting. We're moving back out to the desert sometime soon.

I feel very bad for this mother. It's insult to injury.

[TheSpottedOwl]

I just wish we could go back and do what our parents and grandparents did. All this crap is backfiring big time. Kids shouldn't have "free will".

These days the girls are getting as agressive as the boys.

My son does have a goal, so I'm going to homeschool him so he can make up all his credits and get a HS diploma.

[tiamat]

Hey, I discipline my daughter!

She got spanked occasionally, too!

And she is mostly a good kid.

Sadly, kids have Free Will. All humans do.

I personally think a lot of the girls today are worse than the boys!