Unmarried Parents May Be Forced to Split - Cohabitation Illegal in North Carolina

TBO.com ^ | March 24, 2004 | Associated Press

[kennedy]

An unmarried couple who are the parents of a 2-year-old child may be forced to separate because cohabitation is illegal in North Carolina and would violate the woman's probation.

Melissa Sheridan said she has about two years of probation left for welfare fraud in New York state. She moved to North Carolina a few months ago with her boyfriend, John Finger.

New York allowed her to leave with the assumption North Carolina would supervise her probation, but North Carolina has refused because she and Finger live together, she said.

Terry Gootee of the 5th Judicial District's Division of Community Corrections said North Carolina routinely refuses to accept cases involving cohabitation.

"We cannot allow that person to violate the law," he said.

Gootee said cohabiting couples have three choices: Get married, move to another state or set up separate households.

New Hanover County Sheriff Sid Causey said he couldn't remember the last time someone was charged with cohabiting in the county, which includes Wilmington and had nearly 3,000 households of unmarried partners in the 2000 Census.

"It is still on the books. But it is almost impossible to enforce," Causey said.

Sheridan said she and Finger are each married to other people and cannot afford divorces. If they are forced to separate, Sheridan said, she will go on welfare until she can get a job to support her family.

[kennedy]

Sheridan said she and Finger are each married to other people and cannot afford divorces.

Wonderful example that they are setting for their two year old.

[kennedy]

Melissa Sheridan said she has about two years of probation left for welfare fraud in New York state. ... If they are forced to separate, Sheridan said, she will go on welfare

At least she has a trade that she can fall back on.

[martin_fierro]

Melissa Sheridan said she has about two years of probation left for welfare fraud in New York state. She moved to North Carolina a few months ago with her boyfriend, John Finger.

Nope. Not gonna go there.

[GovernmentShrinker]

They're obviously not really married to other people. Just some government document says they are, and the government and the lawyers want money to make the meaningless document go away. And in the meantime the government wants OUR moeny, so it can break up this little family and put this woman on welfare.

Get the government OUT of marriage!

[NCPAC]

Can't one of these two individuals "rent a room" from the other? Draw up a BS lease and pay $5.00 a month or something?

[azhenfud]

"At least she has a trade that she can fall back on."

She already fell back on it and got ketched....

[tbpiper]

break up this little family

You make it sound so cute. It's not a family and if they really wanted to divorce there other spouses, they would. Their behavior does not make a legal document meaningless. This is not government messing with marriage. These two messed it up far worse than the government could. They're just finding out that actions(or inactions) have consequences.

[onedoug]

Actions have consequences. These people made free choices.

American government abdication of its endorsement of the cornerstone of Western civilization would have its consequences too.

[day10]

It's really sick, but I would like to see photos of these 2 geniuses.

The last time I asked for photos was when the Scottish guy dumped his fiancee for his fiancee's mother and I really regretted it

[freeeee]

Their behavior does not make a legal document meaningless

I see. A legal document makes a marriage.

So when a mail order bride gets her green card and hits the road, it's still marriage.

And when two people hate each other and haven't seen each other in years, that's marriage too.

And Britney Spear's "marriage" was also a marriage.

Love, trust, friendship, monogamy, commitment, these things are absolutely irrelevent. You can have all of them, and not be married, or have none of them and be married. Why? Because marriage is defined as a stroke of government's magic wand. (Talk about cheapening the institution!)

Hey I got an idea. When I die, I'm going to get government to grant me a birth certificate. That way I'll be alive.

[Tax-chick]

Just damn. One way or another, I expect these swell people will end up with some of my tax dollars.

[tbpiper]

I see. A legal document makes a marriage.

Typical libertarian, missed the point entirely.

[freeeee]

What is the point?

[NCPAC]

Actually, a legal document IS what makes a marriage - at least in the eyes of the government. If not, what does?

Get the government out of the marriage business. Stop licensing/regulating/taxing certain behaviors preferably over certain other behaviors.

[ChevyZ28]

As a Deputy Sheriff in the State of North Carolina, The cohabitation law is hard to enforce. As I write this post, I am trying to imagine the look on the Judge's face when I sit before him and testify to why I have arrested to otherwise law abiding citizens for living together while not married. I do not think men and women should live together not married, with or without children. However, this law is none the less hard to enforce. By the way, should even civil unions be allowed, this is another battle we can look forward to fighting. Soon, the new logic will be if two people of the same gender can be allowed to have benefit coverage and not be married but civilly unioned, then why can't me and my opposite gender mate do the samething. The end of marriage as we know it is in sight.

[Cooter]

Another New Yorker in New Hanover County. There's a surprise (not).

[dmz]

Actually, you're the one making it sound so cute and simple, IMHO. The great big world out there is a little more gray than you seem to be able to see.

A very close friend of mine is still technically married, though he and his "wife" and have not lived under the same roof for 13 years. Their child is 13. He has primary custody (because she has been a f-up, if you know what I mean). He is a freeper and a stand up guy (who, admittedly, made a doozy of a mistake).

Getting a divorce in Maryland (where they both live) would probably mean she would get primary custody, and he would have to pay alimony.

Sometimes the real world is confused. It happens.

[MEGoody]

Don't blame the government because these people are sinful and lazy.

[MEGoody]

"A legal document makes a marriage."

A legal document makes a legal marriage.

"So when a mail order bride gets her green card and hits the road, it's still marriage."

Yes. . .that is if it was a legal marriage to begin with. A marriage that is found to have taken place solely for an immigrant to get a 'green card' is not a legal marriage. They have been dissolved in the past when this was discovered.

"And when two people hate each other and haven't seen each other in years, that's marriage too."

If they are still legally married, yes.

"And Britney Spear's "marriage" was also a marriage."

Yes, it was a legal marriage.

"Love, trust, friendship, monogamy, commitment, these things are absolutely irrelevent."

On the contrary. These things are what marriage is supposed to be based on. Don't fault the system of legal marriage just because people abuse it. Foregoing a system of legal marriages isn't going to stop these things from occurring.

Society has a stake in defining what 'marriage' is for legal purposes. I'm sure you've read all the reasons before, because I've listed them in posts to you.

" When I die, I'm going to get government to grant me a birth certificate."

Bad analogy, and not the least bit clever.

[tbpiper]

What is the point?

I rest my case.