This is toooo easy.
Posted on 03/18/2004 9:08:10 AM PST by NativeNewYorker
Prague (dpa) - A Czech historian thinks he may have traced the roots of U.S. presidential contender John Kerry to the famous Rabbi Judah Loew, a mediaeval mystic and legendary creator of Golem, the so-called Jewish Frankenstein of Prague. Historian Jaroslav Bransky, writing in Thursday's edition of the Czech weekly news magazine Reflex, followed Kerry's paternal lineage back to the Loew family of Boskovice in what is now the Czech Republic region of Moravia. The magazine also published a photograph of Bransky standing outside a row of two-story houses where he believes Kerry's ancestors lived. ``There is no doubt that Kerry's Boskovice ancestry originated in these houses, which today have the addresses 3, 5, 7 and 9 Zborovska street,'' Bransky wrote. Boskovice is 80 kilometres southwest of Horni Benesov, the hometown of Kerry's Jewish grandfather Fritz Kohn. Kohn was a U.S. immigrant who changed his name to Kerry. Czech and Austrian geneologists documented Kohn's family history last year for the Boston Globe newspaper while Kerry, a Democratic senator from Massachusetts, was gearing up for a presidential bid. Since then the international media have turned a spotlight on Horni Benesov, a mining town of 2,400. But Bransky said he found a deeper story from Kerry's past in Boskovice, a town of 11,000 with a rich Jewish heritage. A local historian, Bransky followed the family tree to Boskovice's Jewish community through the senator's grandmother Ida, the wife of Fritz Kohn. Jews comprised up to one-third of Boskovice's population for about 600 years, from the mid-1300s until most were killed in the Holocaust during World War II. Bransky said house records as far back as 1727 show that several Loew families lived in Boskovice's Jewish ghetto. Among them was Bernard Loew. Born in 1771, Bransky said Bernard Loew was Kerry's great-great-great grandfather. Bransky also said Bernard was apparently a descendant of Sinai Loew, brother of Rabbi Judah Loew ben Bezalel. Rabbi Judah Loew was a mystic and religious scholar who died in 1609 and is buried in Prague. He served as chief rabbi for Poland, Moravia and Prague. According to a popular legend, Rabbi Loew magically created a manlike creature from mud called Golem to protect Prague's Jewish community. The legend and the mysterious rabbi have been the subject of numerous books and movies through the years. Bransky said a precise link between Rabbi Loew and Kerry may be impossible to find because many of Boskovice's family records were destroyed in an 1823 fire. But he said the evidence is strong and may someday help answer the question posed in his magazine article: ``Did Kerry's ancestor create Golem?'' John was his greatest creation...
Well, the democrats have a long and troubled relationship with rabbits. Here's a bit of the history of that eminent and beloved moron, Jimmy Carter's meeting with a Killer Rabbit. If anyone is able to dig up the poster for "Paws", I'll be grateful.
Dear Cecil:
What's the straight dope on Jimmy Carter's once being attacked by a killer rabbit? I hear there are actually photos of Carter swinging for his life at this rabbit, but his people refused to release them because "some facts about the president must remain forever wrapped in obscurity." What the hell is going on? --Donald Lilly, North Hollywood, California
Dear Donald:
Well, right now I'd say it's pretty quiet, which is about what you'd figure, seeing as how the killer rabbit thing happened in 1979. Not that stories about feckless good ol' boy presidents don't have their pertinence these days. Say what you will about Bill Clinton's PR problems, though, Jimmy Carter was in a class by himself. Nice man, but he was one president whose image a couple accusations from bimboes would have probably improved.
The rabbit incident happened on April 20 while Carter was taking a few days off in Plains, Georgia. He was fishing from a canoe in a pond when he spotted the fateful rabbit swimming toward him. It was never precisely determined what the rabbit's problem was. Carter, always trying to look at things from the other guy's point of view, later speculated that it was fleeing a predator. Whatever the case, it was definitely a troubled rabbit. "It was hissing menacingly, its teeth flashing and nostrils flared and making straight for the president," a press account said.
The Secret Service having been caught flatfooted--I'll grant you an amphibious rabbit assault is a tough thing to defend against--the president did what he could to protect himself. Initially it was reported that he had hit the rabbit with his paddle. Realizing this would not play well with the Rabbit Lovers Guild, Carter later clarified that he had merely splashed water at the rabbit, which then swam off toward shore. A White House photographer, ever alert to history's pivotal moments, snapped a picture of the encounter for posterity.
Good thing, too. Carter's own staff was skeptical when he told the rabbit story back at the White House. Some ventured the opinion that rabbits couldn't swim, didn't attack people, and sure weren't about to take on a sitting president, even if it was Jimmy Carter. Miffed, Jimmy ordered up a print of the aforementioned photo, but this failed to resolve the issue. The picture showed the president with his paddle raised, and there was something in the water, "but you couldn't tell what it was," an anonymous staffer was quoted as saying. The average politician would have said, goddamit, I'm president of the United States and I say it was a rabbit. But Carter was not that kind of guy. He ordered a blowup made, establishing at last that his attacker was, well, a bunny, or "swamp rabbit," to use press secretary Jody Powell's somewhat fiercer sounding term.
OK, not one of the shining moments of Carter's career, but so far not a major train wreck, inasmuch as nobody outside the White House knew anything about it. Jody Powell took care of that problem the following August when he told the rabbit story to Associated Press reporter Brooks Jackson over a cup of tea. Powell ought to have known that you cannot tell anything to reporters in August because there is nothing else to write about and they will make any fool thing into a front page scandal. Which is exactly what happened. The Washington Post put the bunny story on page one complete with a cartoon takeoff of the famous "Jaws" movie poster entitled "Paws." The media ran with the story for a week, the worst aspect from Carter's perspective undoubtedly being the columnists, who basically all said, yeah, it's just a rabbit, but it shows you the kind of president we've got here. The administration refused to release the photos, although I seem to recall that Reagan's people later found and leaked them. Carter's subsequent drubbing at the polls was a foregone conclusion, hostage crisis or not. Lesson for life #1: if it moves, kill it. Lesson for life #2: if you can't kill it, for God's sake don't talk about it to the Associated Press.
Gollum?
This is toooo easy.
/sarcasm off/
But he said the evidence is strong and may someday help answer the question posed in his magazine article: ``Did Kerry's ancestor create Golem?''
he must mean his ancestors brother
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