Posted on 01/02/2004 12:34:27 PM PST by Sloth
[SIOUX CITY, IA] -- Vermont Governor Howard Dean, presumptive front-runner for the Democratic presidential nomination, made a brief campaign stop at yesterday's monthly conference of the Western Iowa Association of Indian-Americans. Chairman Sanjeev Sharma, M.D., and Vice Chairman Naveen Kumar commenced the meeting with some introductory remarks about the upcoming caucuses, Bobby Jindal's recent gubernatorial race in Louisiana and the outsourcing of technical employment to India-based firms.
Shortly thereafter, Governor Dean appeared from behind a curtain sporting buckskin pants, war paint and what appeared to be a child's plastic headdress. The Governor enthusiastically saluted the crowd with the Atlanta Braves' "Tomahawk chop" and an improvised rain dance.
"How. It heap big honor, be here with you," Dean began. "Me thank you and Great Spirit for chance to have pow-wow." Dean smiled and bowed to Sharma, saying, "You great medicine man. Me medicine man, too. Me proud to call you kemosabe."
"Me here on sad occasion, " the governor continued, turning to face the crowd. "Big chief Bush, him send heap many braves and squaws, fight in Iraq. Many braves and squaws scalped. If me big chief, no braves and squaws die. Me smoke-um peace pipe with Iraq."
The candidate then turned to domestic issues. "Me made chief of Vermont tribe many moons ago. Me heap experienced with budget process and fiscal mechanisms. If me big chief, me give you much wampum! Big chief Bush give no wampum, make squaws and papooses starve. Bush no help braves stop drinking firewater."
"Indians good," Mr. Dean concluded. "Dean good. Bush bad. May Great Spirit bless America."
Reaction was mixed within the audience. WIAIA board member Vinaya Chandrasekhar, an immigrant from Jamshedpur who works as an engineering consultant, seemed somewhat put out by the brevity and simplicity of Dean's message. "I do not understand why he said the things he did. I do not think he properly understands our interests," she said.
In contrast, Greg Packer, a highway maintenance worker from New York (not a member of the group), was very supportive of the governor's statements. "Me think chief Dean right on. War bad. Bush bad. Dean good. Dean make-um heap good big chief."
After the speech, Dean spoke with reporters and elaborated on his campaign strategy. "I try to reach out to people where they are. I want to show every demographic that I'm sensitive to their concerns and needs. These people are America. They're who I am. I am an Indian. I'm a poor migrant farm worker. I'm a teenage incest victim who needs an abortion. I'm a gun-toting bigot. Yo soy una soccer mom. That's the message we're trying to get across."
The governor said he prepared for the visit by listening to Paul Revere & the Raiders' Indian Reservation during the drive from the airport.
Dean subsequently made several other stops in the tri-country area; at the last, a speech before a chapter of the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers, he somberly recounted memories from his childhood. "I was watching a NASCAR game last week, and during half-time, I started thinking about how much I personally owe to organized labor. Growing up black in rural Mississippi was not easy. Before supper every night, Dick Gephardt's dad would remind our family that the union was the only reason there was food on our table."
Ping!
ROFL ! What a hoot ! Good job on the writeup and the pic !! haha ! ...
This is funny ! The parody AND the pic ...
Applause! Applause! ROTFL! I love this as much as I the last one I read, the one that was posted on Rush's site (wish I'd have thought of that, LOL!). You are a creative genius. Thanks for the ping and keep posting!
Here are a couple of pics I did today ...
Very well done Sloth. LOL!!!
HUH?
I'm a gun-totin' American, is he trying to appeal to me or slam me? (not that it really matters....)
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