How You Can Become a Metrosexual (ick alert)

Netscape ^ | 12/28/2003

[Utah Girl]

There is no one hipper than a metrosexual. A who you say? A metrosexual is a straight, urban male who is eager to embrace and even show off his feminine side. That means he gets expensive haircuts, wears designer suits, and uses $40 face cream. And thanks to a certain type of male celebrity, it's now cool for a man to own 43 pairs of Bruno Magli shoes, wear moisturizer, and paint his nails. You're not born a metrosexual. You become one by learning and living by basic rules of fashion, culture, and etiquette. Some say the metrosexual is the new male ideal. (Not to put any pressure on you.) If you're at a loss as to how to do that, you can read all about it in the first-ever guidebook, "The Metrosexual Guide To Style: A Handbook For the Modern Man" by Michael Flocker.

Find out who is and who isn't a "metrosexual"--and maybe figure out if YOU are one!

Metrosexuals DO This:

Invest lots of money in nice accessories, such as watches, designer sunglasses, and money clips.
Clothes should conform to your body. Get tailored suits.
Your belt and shoes must always match. (Black on black works best.)
A silver, stainless steel watchband is a must-have.

Get it from Amazon.com: "The Metrosexual Guide To Style: A Handbook For the Modern Man"

Metrosexuals DON'T Ever Wear This:
Plaid flannel
Pirate shirts

Pleated pants
Mullets
Sport watches
High school or college class rings

Surprise! It's not money or good looks. What women want most in a man is...

[taxed2death]

hmmmm...I buy nice accessories too :)

I just purchased a nice set of carbon fiber slip-ons and a new chip for my Aprilia, SL 1000 , he, he, he...

I buy nice clothes too:

I ordered a set of Vanson custom racing leathers....he, he, he...


My feminine side? Hmmmm...I love lookin at chicks! Close enough? Perhaps not ;(

Oh well, no metrosexual here ladies, sorry !

[laredo44]

Metrosexuals seem like men who would subscribe to the following.

1. It is better to look good than to feel good.
2. It's not what you know but who you know.
3. An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.

[taxed2death]

"vibrant, soft and supple"....oh mannnnn! That's choice, thanks for putting a smile on my face this morning !!!!!!!!

[Lockbar]

"I got a Microtouch Men's Personal Groomer for Christmas. I probably got it because I am not a metrosexual (haven't tried it yet). The question is will I be one if I use it."


LOL, you are half-way there already, you opened the box!! No, seriously, I use a nose and ear hair trimmer myself, no woman can ever look at a guy with real sexual interest if he has a forest growing out of his orifices. Now go put on a plaid flannel shirt and "butch up!" ;-)

[mitch5501]

"You're not born a metrosexual"

yeah right...not yet anyway

The Metrosexual Guide To Style: A Handjob For the Modern Man...some folks have too much flockin' time on their hands.

[Lockbar]

"1. It is better to look good than to feel good.
2. It's not what you know but who you know.
3. An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance."

Weren't these the prerequisites for working in the Klinton Whitehouse? Looking good was only in their own minds. Nobody there ever looked good, except for Elinore Mon-dull sneaking in to "visit" the Pervert in Chief.

[Klickitat]

why do they include the word sexual? If they're all hetero why not call them metromen or metroheteros or just plain fops? BTW what are pleated pants haven't heard of those.

[Fresh Wind]

So, what's wrong with mullets?

[bigcat00]

I've got an 11 year old boy. He loves tackle football, basketball. Wants to play lacrosse this spring. Loves to shoot his pellet gun. Wants a .22 or a 20 gauge for his birthday. Was thrilled when I let him shoot my 9mm. His favorite TV show (other than watching the St.Louis Rams) is Auto Week. He takes out the garbage, mows the lawn, works in the garden, and wants to earn money to buy a pickup when he turns 16.

Guess I'm a failure as a father.

[jellybean]

Retrosexual list ping...

This is a brand new list for women who like manly men! We don't want no limp-wristed, sissified girly men.

Let me know if you want on or off the list...

[Nakota]

Gee, we alwuays used to call guys like that pussies. Now I have to learn a whole new word.

[joesnuffy]

Farm&Fleet

Is my one stop shopping center...they got everything ya need under one roof... clothes deodorant salt blocks drill bits ammo and cattle feed....what the heck else does anybody need?

[logic101.net]

The guys who call themselves "metro-sexuals" are the same ones we used to call wimps and sissys.

How times change.


Mark A Sity
http://www.logic101.net/

[joesnuffy]

Metrosexuals never wear a mullet?

[HamiltonJay]

Interesting the list of what men want has "intelligence" listed as number 3, yet the females list doesn't even mention intelligence..... funny, that seems to go against all the stereotyping that guys want their women stupid.

Lord knows I don't want them dumb, but if they expect a metrosexual, I sure ain't the guy for them.. of course if that's what they are looking for, I'd probably rule them out for their lack of intelligence anyway.

[Nick Danger]

[exile]

What man in his right mind needs tons of shoes? I've given this a lot of thought, and have concluded that the optimal number of pairs of shoes a man needs is three. One pair of sneakers, for exercise, errands and sneaking. A pair of dress shoes for everything else, and a spare pair of dress shoes in case something happens to the first pair.

[Sockdologer]

Just a couple of unhip non-metro sexual guys.

[Sockdologer]

uh, metrosexual, rather.

sorry!

[sticker]

You forgot boots, a pair of hiking boots is a must. Also, are waders considered shoes?