Lewinsky: 'I can't get a man'

itv.com ^ | November 19, 2003

[hunter112]

They just won't take you home to Mom

Well, that hasn't stopped some guys. Especially when they have no mom to take her home to, I suppose that does reduce the dating pool, though.

I would imagine that the real trouble is her mind. To go from absolute total obscurity to headline news in a virtual instant has to be an enormous shock to any young mind. Even sports and entertainment stars got to spend a few weeks, if not several years, contemplating being famous for their "talents". To go from complete unknown private citizen to the central figure of a sordid chapter of American history and then back to near obscurity (except as a part of a snickering remark) while still in your twenties has got to mess with her head something fierce. I'm sure that this freaks guys out.

Is she truly irredeemable? What if she "repented" as part of joining some religious group? If she got counseling from a religious leader in your church (I'm not just talking to you, Sam) then came out by his/her side, and said she was going to make a new life for herself, would you take her seriously? Would anyone?

[Quilla]

When you think about it, there are probably two people on this earth who would even consider dating her.

[martin_fierro]

You just know some photographer waited and waited around to take THAT shot.

[martin_fierro]

Monica could date Hillary -- and hit the Bifecta!

[chiefqc]

Kissing her would be like giving bent willie a bj.

[beckett]

Lewinsky: 'I can't get a man'

Surprise, Surprise, Surprise

[scott7278]

Monica -- you've never had a man, either.

[lilylangtree]

She can have any man as long as she opens her mouth and provides freebies.

[PISANO]

Lewinsky: 'I can't get a man'

News FLASH BIMBO, "YOU NEVER HAD ONE."

[hellinahandcart]

[Strider]

"I want to shake them and say, 'C'mon, just like me! Do what I say!'"

She should try the metrosexuals. Is Howard Dean available?

[LocalYokel]

Ok, let's imagine:

Hey John! I hear you've got a new girlfriend! What's she like, when do we meet her?
Uhhh....

So honey, when do your father and I get to meet this new girlfriend of yours?
Uhhh....

How come we never go out anymore? I'm tired of watching rented videos at home! Let's go out tonight.
Uhhh....

So, what do you want to do tonight?
Uhhh, uhhh, uhhh, ....

[PeoplesRepublicOfWashington]

Who wants to lick an ashtray?

[jpl]

Does the phrase "damaged goods" mean anything to you Monica? Well, you're more like poisoned goods.

[trini]

Nice keywords.

[hellinahandcart]

[TrappedInLiberalHell]

She's just lookin' for a regular fella(tio).

When interviewed on the Today Show, Lewinsky's latest date was asked why he couldn't bear to kiss her on the lips. He responded "Alas, whore Couric, I eschew her fellatio..."

[hellinahandcart]

[hellinahandcart]

[HardStarboard]

Monica....try changing out of that blue dress.
It looks like you've been sleeping in it!