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Brand names: Some Americans are naming their children after consumer products
WORLD ^ | 11/15/03 | Gene Edward Veith

Posted on 11/08/2003 3:43:15 AM PST by rhema

NAMES, THE EMBLEMS OF A PERSON'S IDENTITY, used to mean something. "Abraham" means "father of a multitude." "Moses" means "draws out," as of the River Nile and as he would draw the people out of slavery. "Jesus" means "God saves," so that His very name testifies to His deity and His saving work.

In other tribal societies, people are sometimes named for animals ("Sitting Bull") or for something else in nature ("Red Cloud"). The same holds true for European tribes: "Beowulf" means "bee wolf," a figure of speech for "bear." In the Middle Ages, children born on a Saint's Day were named for that saint, giving them their patron saint. Puritans started naming their children after virtues, such as Faith and Prudence, or after other abstractions such as Increase.

Then the meaning of names began to lie generally in some association, as in naming a child for someone in the Bible. Many names have family significance, with children named after parents, ancestors, or other relatives.

The main criterion for names today, though, is not so much their meaning as whether they sound good. Some parents, in order to ensure their child's utter individuality, make up unique names, a set of musical syllables and unusual spellings designed to ensure that no one else in the world has exactly that name.

As the pop culture—the world of entertainment and commercialism—drives out traditional culture, from education to the church, it shows up too in the names people choose for their children. Decades from now, adults will find themselves saddled with the names of by then old-fashioned pop stars who happened to have been big at the time their mothers gave birth. Soap-opera characters, it has been noted, are a major influence on the names of real babies.

A new trend in baby names, however, takes the pop-culture influence to a new level. Cleveland Evans, a psychology professor at Nebraska's Bellevue University and a member of the American Name Society, studied Social Security records for the year 2000 and found that many children today are being named after consumer products.

Twenty-two girls registered that year were named "Infiniti." Not "Infinity" with a "y," as in the illimitable attribute of God, but "Infiniti" with an "i," as in the car. There were also 55 boys named "Chevy" and five girls named "Celica."

Hundreds of children were named after clothing companies. There were 298 girls named "Armani." There were 164 named after the more casual "Nautica." Six boys were named "Timberland," after the boot.

Sometimes the clothing namesakes are more generic, with a special emphasis on fabrics. Five girls were named "Rayon." Six boys were named "Cashmere," seven were named "Denim," and five were named "Cotton" (though perhaps this was for Increase Mather's son).

Forty-nine boys were named "Canon," after the camera. Seven boys were named "Del Monte," apparently in honor of canned vegetables. Twenty-one girls were named "L'Oreal," after the hair dye, presumably to let them know that "you are worth it."

"Sky" might be the name of a nature-loving flower child's offspring (as in River Phoenix), but 23 girls and 6 boys were named "Skyy." This is a brand of vodka. Parents are naming their children after other alcoholic beverages, too. Nine girls were named "Chianti." Six boys were named "Courvoisier."

Perhaps the ultimate product name for kids uncovered by Mr. Evans was ESPN. Two separate parents, one in Texas and one in Michigan, named their sons after the sports cable network. A reporter for the Dallas Morning News traced down the family of big sports fans and learned that the correct pronunciation of little ESPN's name is "espen."

So what does this mean? Are children being seen in the same terms as consumer products or other possessions? Certainly, just as there are trophy wives, there are now trophy children. The desire to own a baby is driving much of the new reproductive technologies. Babies are already being bought and sold in the practice of hiring surrogate mothers.

Certainly parents have the right to name a child anything they want, and it is wrong to give someone a hard time just for having an unusual name, which, as in Johnny Cash's boy named Sue, can be a character-building experience. (Maybe he could have changed the spelling to "Sioux.")

For some, the "Christian name," as it is called, is given at baptism. And its true significance comes from that one individual identity being identified with and joined to a greater name: "ESPN, I baptize you in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit."

Christians find their own name and identity—whatever it is—in the name of Jesus, "God saves."


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Extended News
KEYWORDS: namesake
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To: Fzob
Never heard of John Prine? You are in for a treat. He is the greatest song writer/country folk singer who ever lived. Click here for some basic info. I just bought this rebuilt computer and am just learning the ropes with it. I seem to have lost the ability to post a link. Here is the web address www.shrout.co.uk/jpbackpage.html
201 posted on 11/08/2003 12:08:15 PM PST by carpio
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To: Fzob
For several years I've been saying that it won't belong before you'll see some football players at Texas A&M named "DOWNLOAD JONES", "HARD DRIVE WASHINGTON" and "GIGA BITE SMITH". My wife says one of the cheer leaders will be named "MIRACLE WHIP".
202 posted on 11/08/2003 12:19:12 PM PST by Terry Mross
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To: BenLurkin
I think two. See Post 150.
203 posted on 11/08/2003 12:22:52 PM PST by aruanan
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To: Qwinn
There was a girl in my junior high school named Star Hash.

My ex-inlaws had neighbors who were named Mycock. His name was Jack and her's was Pat. NO SH*T!

204 posted on 11/08/2003 12:23:41 PM PST by Looking4Truth (I'm in one of 'those' moods again....)
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To: independentmind
My sister-in-law often encounters disadvantaged children in her job. A few years ago she worked with a set of twins named Princess and Precious.

Well that way when they grow up to be crack ho's they don't need aliases. :-)

205 posted on 11/08/2003 12:26:24 PM PST by Looking4Truth (I'm in one of 'those' moods again....)
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To: Looking4Truth
Then there's the woman who named her son "Pa Juh Mus". Said she took the name from the sleepwear section of the Sears and Roebuck catalog.
206 posted on 11/08/2003 12:26:46 PM PST by Terry Mross
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To: rhema
My wife was on a flight and heard a woman call her daughter. Her daughter's name, Areola.
From dictionary.com:
2. (Anat. & Med.) The colored ring around the nipple, or around a vesicle or pustule.

I also found a slightly different spelling that means:
A circle of light or radiance surrounding the head or body of a representation of a deity or holy person; a halo.

I don't know which one she meant or whether she even knew but it's too close for comfort for me.

I forgot what comedian it was but he was talking about how bad kids names were and that they might as well call their kids, Falloplia or Testicleese.
207 posted on 11/08/2003 12:41:19 PM PST by Lx (Wanted badly, PIX software version 5.1 or a 16mb flash card for a 520. Can you say desperate?)
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To: Qwinn
I can beat that. In college, I knew a girl named Anita Hurt, and another named Anita Miracle. When I worked for the University of Kentucky, there was a woman working for Henderson Community College (in the U.K. system) whose name was Gaye Midget. I could go on and on here...I've been collecting funny names for years.

One of the best (true story): My sister used to work in L.A. as an admittance clerk in a hospital that specialized in providing malleable penile implants for impotent men. One day, an oriental man came in for an implant. His name was HUNG DONG! (A few years later, there was an item on the news about a man named Hung Dong who was arrested in L.A. for running a Vietnamese prostitution ring. I suspect strongly that it was the same man.)
208 posted on 11/08/2003 12:41:46 PM PST by Renfield
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To: Bon mots
My cousin knows of a black woman who named her daughter Placenta.
209 posted on 11/08/2003 12:42:55 PM PST by Renfield
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To: independentmind
There was a girl (Phillipino immigrant) who went to my high school, whose real name was Queenie.
210 posted on 11/08/2003 12:44:18 PM PST by Renfield
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To: Fifth Business
Yep. There used to be a young black woman who was a cashier at the Harris-Teeter supermarket in Florence, South Carolina, by the name of Latrina. She was oblivious to the implications of her name.
211 posted on 11/08/2003 12:45:38 PM PST by Renfield
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To: GodBlessRonaldReagan
One of my friends knows a man--a used car dealer--in Fayetteville, North Carolina, whose name is Joe Blow.
212 posted on 11/08/2003 12:47:05 PM PST by Renfield
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To: mhking
understood. when i was a child, a classmate of mine was named Montgomery Ward _________.

his mother said that without a father on his birth certificate, that he would need something to make him "classy" and besides she liked to shop in the "big book".

i plan to memorialize this sort of "poor bokra" culture by naming the Governor of MS, in my new novel "Sons of Blood & Daughters of Fire", Sears Roebuck Snopes.

free dixie,sw

213 posted on 11/08/2003 12:47:48 PM PST by stand watie (Resistence to tyrants is obedience to God. -Thomas Jefferson)
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To: carpio
"There's a hole in Daddy's arm, where all the money goes...."
214 posted on 11/08/2003 12:49:30 PM PST by JoJo Gunn (Help control the Leftist population - have them spayed or neutered ©)
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To: Renfield
The worst name ever, and I kid you not, was a woman who named her daughter Clymadia.

People this ignorant deserve none of the rewards of citizenship.
215 posted on 11/08/2003 12:51:46 PM PST by lavrenti ("Tell your momma and your poppa, sometimes good guys don't wear white." The Standells)
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To: NewHampshireDuo
I knew a girl named Ivy Bush in college.
216 posted on 11/08/2003 12:52:25 PM PST by Renfield
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To: rhema
The very best name I've heard belongs to a onetime student in my wife's third grade class(she teaches spec ed). The boy was named Neosynepherine Nyquil + his mama's family name. He made the news locally a few years later for being in an accident but in the paper he was Neo.
217 posted on 11/08/2003 12:58:56 PM PST by arthurus (When the other shoe drops, look out for the cleats!)
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To: Qwinn
Soon the Jones' family will be naming their little boys Dow. The matriarch of the Lynch family will be named Merrill.

I don't know Merrill but I have met Dow. He is 8 now.

218 posted on 11/08/2003 1:02:02 PM PST by arthurus (When the other shoe drops, look out for the cleats!)
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To: Fzob
kid that got the name Shithead

There are many of these, and Placentas, and a few Vaginas&Vageenas. My wife has taught one each.

219 posted on 11/08/2003 1:05:11 PM PST by arthurus (When the other shoe drops, look out for the cleats!)
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To: drlevy88
"Shithead"

As I said, there are quite a few of these now and it is the schools that generally mpose and enforce the Shi-THE-id pronunciation. Daddies and Mom's boyfriends stick with the more traditional sound.

220 posted on 11/08/2003 1:08:12 PM PST by arthurus (When the other shoe drops, look out for the cleats!)
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