Dog rules

email | 09-21-03

[4mycountry]

1. Dogs are never permitted in the house. The dog stays outside in a specially built wooden compartment named, for very good reason, the dog house.

2. Okay, the dog can enter the house, but only for short visits or if his own house is under renovation.

3. Okay, the dog can stay in the house on a permanent basis, provided his dog house can be sold in a yard sale to a rookie dog owner.

4. Inside the house, the dog is not allowed to run free and is confined to a comfortable but secure metal cage.

5. Okay, the cage becomes part of a two-for-one deal along with the dog house in the yard sale, and the dog can go wherever he pleases.

6. The dog is never allowed on the furniture.

7. Okay, the dog can get on the old furniture but not the new furniture.

8. Okay, the dog can get up on the new furniture until it looks like the old furniture and then we'll sell the whole darn works and buy new furniture...upon which the dog will most definitely not be allowed.

9. The dog never sleeps on the bed. Period.

10. Okay, the dog can sleep at the foot of the bed.

11. Okay, the dog can sleep alongside you, but he's not allowed under the covers.

12. Okay, the dog can sleep under the covers but not with his head on the pillow.

13. Okay, the dog can sleep alongside you under the covers with his head on the pillow, but if he snores he's got to leave the room.

14. Okay, the dog can sleep and snore and have nightmares in bed, but he's not to come in and sleep on the couch in the TV room, where I'm now sleeping. That's just not fair.

15. The dog never gets listed on the census questionnaire as "primary resident," even if it's true.

[Johnny Gage]

Basenji owners are smart enough to skip right to step 14.

Bichon Frise owners do the same thing.

[Moleman]

Wow, he's really "puttin" on the dog"

[4mycountry]

I have a dog named Toby...this isn't him but it looks almost exactly like him.

[Jen]

Since my Basenji was an African breed, I wanted to give him an African name. But, my husband refused to let me name him Kunta Kinte (from Roots). So, I had to settle for Toby, which was Kunta Kinte's American slave name. ;-)

Now I have a Miniature Pinscher named Pepper. Your Toby looks like a sweet friendly little dog.

[tob2]

Regarding #13, Pugs snore so this does not apply to them. ROFL!

[Prof Engineer]

Chelsea ping

[PetroniDE]

DOG THREAD BUMP......

[dd5339]

Charlie Bump! http://www.geocities.com/dd5339/index.html?1064369927828

[RikaStrom]

ROFLOL, fuzzbutt skipped directly to step 14 too!