Posted on 08/17/2003 2:08:54 PM PDT by freepatriot32
1. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me.
2. The new girl in my office is a real beauty, and a stripper too, I invited her over for dinner on Friday.
3. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover.
4. Bar food again! Kick a--.
5. I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class.
6. That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm gonna go over and talk to her.
7. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then you don't have to mess with it anymore.
8. I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want'em?
9. It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple more pitchers.
10. Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila Shot off of Stephanie's bare a--.
11. My mother is going to take care of the tab, so order another round for you and your friends.
12. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again.
13. Damn! I love when my pillow smells like your cigars and beer.
14. You are so much smarter than my father.
15. If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let me watch football.
16. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?
17. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
18. You're so sexy when you're hung over.
19. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
20. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
21. I'll be out painting the house.
22. I love it when you ride your Harley, I just wish you had more time to ride.
23. Honey, our new neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come see!
24. No, No, I'll take the car to have the oil changed.
25. Your mother is way better than mine.
26. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine's Day thing and buy yourself something.
27. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire.
28. You need your sleep ya big silly, now stop getting up for the night feedings.
29. Look! My a-- is fatter than yours!
30. Let's get rid of my friends and keep all of yours.
23. Honey, our new neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come see!
Hey, it could happen! (It could snow here tomorrow, too.)
Thanks for the ping. ;-)
Wait, what are we talking about? Is this the pick 7?
Damn, that Barbara Walters is one hot little number...
You did a great job cleaning that toilet!
Ding! Ding! Ding!
*I* said this to my husband when I was interviewing for a six-figure a year position that required 42 weeks of travel annually. It was the job of a lifetime, and I wanted it BADLY!!!
What did Hubby say? "Who's going to clean the house and take care of the kids while you're gone?"
"You are," I replied. "I'll bring home the bacon and you stay home with the kids."
"But I'll never see you," he insisted, perturbed.
"Look, plenty of men do it," I reasoned. "My Dad worked away from home for 3 years, and my Mom did a great job raising us. You could be a Mr. Mom."
His tone quickly shifted to terse. "So, you're going to be sleeping in a different city every week, traveling for days on end?"
"Yes, Honey. Extensive traveling is part of the job, which is why it pays so much. Sometimes I'll be in a different cities during the week. Look, I already passed the screening interview and the personality profile. I'm half-way home. Think about it!"
"Absolutely not!" he roared. "You're my wife. You will sleep next to me at night! I'm not going to spend everyday worrying about what's happening to you in some distant city."
Some may look at the exchange above and think..he's jealous, or over-protective, or worried that I would cheat (of course, I never would, my husband is my love for all time). Me, I look at the above exchange and think...he still adores me after all these years.
P.S. I notified the company that I would not be pursuing the position. If my husband wouldn't support me in it, I didn't want it.
We bought our first gun at *MY* insistence. It's MY 28" Accu-choke, thank you very much!
:)
No, I'm 33 and of average height... oh, and I'm also not your neighbor...
;0)
No, you're even prettier. : )
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