[Guenevere]

ROTFLOL!
I'm married to one!

[boris]

Some of these are old but still amusing.

Here's another:

An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are forced to share a hotel room at a sold-out conference. In the middle of the night, a fire breaks out in the room. The engineer wakes up, looks around, grabs the wastebasket, fills it with water, and puts out the fire and then goes back to sleep.

Well, he must have missed a few embers, because the fire started up again. This time the physicist woke up. He grabbed an envelope and pencil, computed how much water would be required to put out the fire, filled the trashcan with that much water, put out the fire, and returned to sleep.

Don't you just know his calcs were a little off (he was groggy from sleep) and the fire started up again. This time the mathematician awoke. He saw the fire. He saw the wastebasket. He saw the faucet. He said, "A solution exists!" and went back to sleep. By this time the others were awake too. They shook him and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" Puzzled, he looked around again. "Aha! It's not unique!"...and went back to sleep.

--Boris

[boris]

My aerodynamics prof told me that the "Maytag repairman" of engineering (always lonely) was the aeroelastician. Aeroelasticians specialize in wing flutter and other occult phenomena, and they are ignored unless disaster has struck.

He recounted that during testing of a bomber, the test pilot reported flutter at 427 knots. The General was in a tizzy. "Call the aeroelastician! Get him over here!"

So they call him up. "We've got flutter at 427 knots!"

"That's wonderful!" he exclaimed.

"What? Are you crazy? The General is very upset! How can you say it is wonderful?!?"

"You must not have read my report. I predicted flutter at 425 knots!"

--Boris

[GenXFreedomFighter]

Here's one:

An electrical engineer, a mechanical engineer, and a Microsoft engineer are traveling in a rental car. On a stretch of desert highway, the car sputters and dies. The three engineers suggest different approaches to fixing the car and getting underway:

The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the car's electrical system and testing the components.

The mechanical engineer suggests flushing the fuel system.

The Microsoft engineer offers, "Why don't we close all the windows, get out, get back in, and open all the windows again and see if it works?"

[Tijeras_Slim]

An electrical engineer, a mechanical engineer, and their program manager are walking on the beach at lunchtime. Finding an old lantern they rub it and a genie comes out.

"You have freed me from the lamp," the genie says, "I will give each one of you one wish."

The electrical engineer says "I want to be on a racing yacht in the south pacific surrounded by babes." He vanishes.

The mechanical engineer says "I want to be riding a Harley in the southwest, surrounded by babes." He vanishes.

The program manager says "We're on a tight schedule, can you have those guys back after lunch?"

[CholeraJoe]

LMAO. I used to be married to one. Sex was like a construction project.

Overpriced, delayed, and far too tedious.

[Servant of the Nine]

Engineering PING

So9

[Physicist]

The engineer responded briefly: One chalk mark $1; Knowing where to put it $49,999. It was paid in full and the engineer retired again in peace.

True story, if inflated somewhat. The company was General Electric. The bill was $10,000. The engineer was Charles Proteus Steinmetz.

[24Karet]

Ping

[sauropod]

;-)