Posted on 05/22/2003 6:52:44 AM PDT by cherry_bomb88
This is a new thread dedicated to conservative parents of children/teens "at risk".
I noticed in my FReeping that there are a lot of other conservative parents like me dealing with children or teens that are socially "at risk". Yes, there are other web sites out there dedicated to this, however they tend to be liberally/socialistically slanted. They have a whinning "poor pitful me" attitude. As conservatives, from talking with many of you, we take a different attitude and require our children to have that same attitude.
I FReep Mailed Jim Robinson to get his "blessing" on this thread. If you are die-hard anti-medication or don't believe these issues we face are real, please move along and don't come in here to chastize us or blame us or condem us. We have enough to deal with on a daily basis.
The purpose of this thread is for conservative parents (and other concerned parties such as friends,relatives, caregivers, educators, etc.) to have a place to come and share resources, information, ideas, and vent frustrations about the daily life we live with these children. It is also to encourage each other, not coddle. I have found that conservatives have a "we will overcome" attitude in dealing with this. We need to help each other not get discouraged and maintain this attitide.
Please feel free to stay and chat even if you are just "interested" in the subject and have no real personal experience with it. But, again, if this is something you disagree with, please do not stay just to stir up trouble.
Big '88...how about that, my own thread and I can't even snag the "88" post!!! LOL
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NAMI E-News May 20, 2003 Vol. 03-26
__________________________________________________________________
Don't miss your opportunity to register for NAMI's 2003 Annual Convention at the Early Bird rate! The deadline to register at this discounted rate is May 31, 2003.
Confronting - and successfully resolving - the mental health crisis in our communities requires that NAMI members forge innovative partnerships with other committed activists both within and outside of the mental health arena. These working partnerships must then be powered by the latest information, the most effective strategies, and the most up-to-date tactics.
We invite you to join us in Minneapolis next summer as we identify our partners, collaborate on tactics and strategies, and move the process of confronting the mental health crisis forward.
It's a wonderful opportunity to learn about new research, services and treatment that will benefit you and your family members.
In addition to the program tracks, a vital component of the program are the research sessions. NAMI is working with leading researchers and clinicians to bring you research updates in five critical areas:
* Treatment of Cognitive Deficits in Schizophrenia
* Brain Imaging: Fulfilling the Promise
* Early Intervention for Psychotic Disorders
* New Research on Borderline Personality Disorder
* New Research In Bipolar Disorder
Among the confirmed speakers for these cutting-edge presentations are Thomas Insel, MD, Director of NIMH; Charles Schulz, MD, University of Minnesota; Michael Green, PhD, UCLA; Richard Keefe, PhD, Duke University; Nancy Andreasen, MD, University of Iowa; Barbara Cornblatt, MD, Hillside Hospital; Thomas McGlashan, MD, Yale; Mary Zanarini, EdD, McLean Hospital; Emil Coccaro, MD, University of Chicago; Peter Weiden, MD, SUNY Brooklyn; Robert Findling,MD, Case Western Reserve University; William Lawson, MD, Howard University; Carol Tamminga, MD, University of Texas; Husseini Manji, MD, NIMH; Shirley Marks, MD, Black Psychiatrists Association.
Many more of the nation's leading scientists will be appearing in these sessions and in the ever-popular ASK-THE-DOCTOR sessions.
Last Chance for Early Bird Rates!
Join us in Minneapolis, MN with clinicians, researchers, and NAMI grassroots experts from all over the country. For additional information regarding NAMI's 2003 convention--including an outline of the program, confirmed speakers, and hotel and travel information--and to register on-line, visit the convention section of the NAMI Web site at
http://www.nami.org/convention03/minneapolis.html.
My personal disclaimer....I receive the NAMI newsletter. I read everything with a grain of salt. There is some good information, some great ideas and some great doctors...HOWEVER...they can tend to lean to the left some times....so as you read, remember to put the information through your "liberal BS" filter. :o)
Sorry I haven't posted any research stuff or quips today, folks. I had a LOOOOOOOOONG day and a brutal headache. But I'll get back on it tomorrow.
A Trucker's Story
I try not to be biased, but I had my doubts about hiring Stevie. His placement counselor assured me that he would be a good, reliable busboy. But I had never had a mentally handicapped employee and wasn't sure I wanted one.
I wasn't sure how my Customers would react to Stevie. He was short, a little dumpy with the smooth facial features and thick-tongued speech of Down Syndrome.
I wasn't worried about most of my trucker customers because truckers don't generally care who buses tables as long as the meatloaf platter is good and the pies are homemade. The four-wheeler drivers were the ones who concerned me; the mouthy college kids traveling to school; the yuppie snobs who secretly polish their! silverware with their napkins for fear of catching some dreaded "truck stop germ"; the pairs of white shirted business men on expense accounts who think every truck stop waitress wants to be flirted with.
I knew those people would be uncomfortable around Stevie so I closely watched him for the first few weeks. I shouldn't have worried. After the first week, Stevie had my staff wrapped around his stubby little finger, and within a month my truck regulars had adopted him as their official truck stop mascot. After that, I really didn't care what the rest of the customers thought of him.
He was like a 21-year-old in blue jeans and Nikes, eager to laugh and eager to please, but fierce in his attention to his duties. Every salt and pepper shaker was exactly in its place, not a bread crumb or coffee spill was visible when Stevie got done with the table. Our only problem was persuading him to wait to clean a table until after the customers were finished.
He would hover in the background, shifting his weight from one foot to the other,scanning the dining room until a table was empty. Then he would scurry to the empty table and carefully bus dishes and glasses onto cart and meticulously wipe the table up with a practiced flourish of his rag. If he thought a customer was watching, his brow would pucker with added concentration. He took pride in doing his job exactly right, and you had to love how hard he tried to please each and every person he met.
Over time, we learned that he lived with his mother, a widow who was disabled after repeated! surgeries for cancer. They lived on their Social Security benefits in public housing two miles from the truck stop. Their Social worker, who stopped to check on him every so often, admitted they had fallen between the cracks. Money was tight, and what I paid him was probably the difference between them being able to live together and Stevie being sent to a group home.
That's why the restaurant was a gloomy place that morning last August, the first morning in three years that Stevie missed work.
He was at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester getting a new valve or something put in his heart. His social worker said that people with Down Syndrome often had heart problems at an early age so this wasn't unexpected, and there was a good chance he would come through the surgery in good shape and be back at work in a few months.
A ripple of excitement ran through the staff later that morning when word came that he was out of surgery, in recovery and doing fine. Frannie, head waitress, let out a war hoop and did a little dance in the aisle when she heard the good news. Belle Ringer, one of our regular trucker customers, stared at the sight of the 50-year-old grandmother of four doing a victory shimmy beside his table.
Frannie blushed, smoothed her apron and shot Belle Ringer a withering look.
He grinned. "OK, Frannie, what was that all about?" he asked.
"We just got word that Stevie is out of surgery and going to be okay."
"I was wondering where he was. I had a new joke to tell him. What was the surgery about?"
Frannie quickly told Belle Ringer and the other two drivers sitting at his booth about Stevie's surgery, then sighed. "Yeah, I'm glad he is going to be OK" she said. "But I don't know how he and his Mom are going to handle all the bills. From what I hear, they're barely getting by as it is."
Belle Ringer nodded thoughtfully, and Frannie hurried off to wait on the rest of her tables. Since I hadn't had time to round up a busboy to replace Stevie and really didn't want to replace him, the girls were busing their own tables that day until we decided what to do.
After the morning rush, Frannie walked into my office. She had a couple of paper napkins in her hand a funny look on her face.
" What's up?" I asked.
"I didn't get that table where Belle Ringer and his friends were sitting cleared off after they left, and Pony Pete and Tony Tipper were sitting there when I got back to clean it off," she said. "This was folded and tucked under a coffee cup."
She handed the napkin to me, and three$20 bills fell onto my desk when I opened it. On the outside, in big, bold letters, was printed "Something For Stevie."
"Pony Pete asked me what that was all about," she said, "so I told about Stevie and his Mom and everything, and Pete looked at Tony and Tony looked at Pete, and they ended up giving! Me this."
She handed me another paper napkin that had "Something For Stevie" scrawled on its outside. Two $50 bills were tucked within its folds. Frannie looked at me with wet, shiny eyes, shook her head and said simply "truckers."
That was three months ago. Today is Thanksgiving, the first day Stevie is supposed to be back to work. His placement worker said he's been counting the days until the doctor said he could work, and it didn't matter at all that it was a holiday. He called 10 times in the past week, making sure we knew he was coming, fearful that we had forgotten him or that his job was in jeopardy.
I arranged to have his mother bring him to work, met them in the parking lot and invited them both to celebrate his day back.
Stevie was thinner and paler, but couldn't stop grinning as he pushed through the doors and headed for the back room where his apron and busing cart were waiting.
"Hold up there, Stevie, not so fast," I said. I took him and his mother by their arms. "Work can wait for a minute. To celebrate you coming back, breakfast for you and your mother is on me!" I led them toward a large corner booth at the rear of the room.
I could feel and hear the rest of the staff following behind as we marched through the dining room.
Glancing over my shoulder, I saw booth after booth of grinning truckers empty and join the procession. We stopped in front of the big table.
Its surface was covered with coffee cups, saucers and dinner plates, all sitting slightly crooked on dozens of folded paper napkins.
"First thing you have to do, Stevie, is clean up this mess," I said. I tried to sound stern.
Stevie looked at me, and then at his mother, then pulled out one of the napkins. It had "Something for Stevie" printed on the outside. As he picked it up, two $10 bills fell onto the table.
Stevie stared at the money, then at all the napkins peeking from beneath the tableware, each with his name printed or scrawled on it.
I turned to his mother. "There's more than $10,000 in cash and checks on that table, all from truckers and trucking companies that heard about your problems.
"Happy Thanksgiving,"
Well, it got real noisy about that time, with everybody hollering and shouting, and there were a few tears, as well. But you know what's funny?
While everybody else was busy shaking hands and hugging each other, Stevie, with a big, big smile on his face, was busy clearing all the cups and dishes from the table. Best worker I ever hired.
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