As a caseworker (many moons ago), she had a client who named their children (and I'll have to do this phonetically, you'll understand why in a bit) Goh-narya and Sifal-les.
When my wife told me this, I gave her the classic crooked head puppy dog look. "Arrough?" (my Scooby-Doo questioning sound)
She repeated the names.
I still looked like a deer-in-headlights.
She said she asked the client was asked why she came up with those names for her children.
"Oh, I saw them on a sign, and I liked the way they looked."
My wife's jaw dropped. "Where did you see the sign?"
Matter of factly, the client answered, "At the doctor's office."
Realization was beginning to dawn on me when my wife politely spelled the names for me: Gonorrhea and Syphilis.
I said what I always say when something unfathomably stupid comes my way: "Just damn."
"Hold muh beer 'n watch this!" PING....
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Then there was my fifth grade teacher who named her son 'Richard', a fine name unless your surname is 'Head'.
I'm sure that telemarketers won't be using that "I know you" trick of asking for "Bill" or "Mike". "Hi, is Syphillis there?" (they will have to suppress the snicker).