Actual Analogies and Metaphors Found in High School Essays:

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[Mad Dawgg]

Ok this is some damned good stuff My comments are in Parenthesis ()

Post more if you have any I'm in a silly mood today and I need some partners in crime.

Join in with any appropriate stuff and as always Cheese Moose is welcome (If not required by law)

[Mad Dawgg]

Ping for your input

[kassie]

Some of these are just too funny.

[SarahW]

Is this from one of those bad writing contests? :)

The underpants alliances is my favorite

[Mad Dawgg]

"Is this from one of those bad writing contests? :)"

Not sure

Got it froma Canadian friend via e-mail and he has not answered my queries yet.

[dd5339]

ROTFLMAO Coffee spewing alert!

Semper Fi

[HairOfTheDog]

These are great! - I think some of them are pretty durned clever!

His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

LOL!

I like the one I saw once in another collection of metaphors:

She gave him a look you could pour on a waffle.

Jen... Perhaps you should ping the others in your group from the Hobbit Hole that are in that writing contest. Maybe this will provide a bit of inspiration!

[Dog]

She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

My favorite!!!

[Mr. Jeeves]

These are great, but no way are they from high school essays. They are more like lines professional writers would come with for a bad fiction contest (note that they are all from fiction, not lines one would find in schoolwork).

[JenB]

Oh, these are just too good!

I read a phrase once that has stuck in my mind ever since - "He swept from the room like a very long procession of one person". Actually, in context, it worked very well.

[Radix]

Those are very funny.

TY for the post.

[Overtaxed]

She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

I'll have to remember that one!

[cavtrooper21]

Oh, lordy these are good, just what I needed on monday. TANX

[cavtrooper21]

ping HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE "sputter, cough, damn cigs...."

[Terriergal]

Thought you might get a kick out of these!

[Ben Bolt]

And to think people think in this way ! Oh Terrier , to let my wolf play on the land with a wet tongue .. Yet she grow on me like Ecoli . Come on .. 'Ya want me and you know it . Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze . Her eyes were like limpid pools only they had forgotten to put in any Ph cleanser .

Government education ping ..

[Savage Beast]

I hope these kids all A's! I haven't laughed so hard since Best in Show! In fact I woke my wife. She thought I was having some kind of catastrophe or something! The E. coli! The dog! The ballerena! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Oh! Somebody help m.... Oh! My side hurts! Hahahahahahahahahahaha! Oh please! Don't post anything this funny again! Hahahahahahahahaha!

[Ditter]

I laughted until I cried! Thanks so much these are great. Reminds me of a bad writing contest thingy I got on e-mail once. people were trying to write the first paragraph of the worst novel ever. I think the winner started out....... "It was a dark & stormy night......"

[Kevin Curry]

They are more like lines professional writers would come with for a bad fiction contest (note that they are all from fiction, not lines one would find in schoolwork).

Oh, I don't know. I took a creative writing class in high school that gave its students abundant opportunites to churn out startlingly funny lines such as this. The teacher had no sense of humor, she'd mark a budding Ring Lardner down, but some of the students turned out magnificent nuggets of bad metaphors and purple prose.

[Mad Dawgg]

This is a great start to a reacurring thread on this subject: Bad or Funny Analogies and Metaphors!

If you run across something good post it here!

Hell just any good lines from Books or movies would work!

What do ya all think?