I know how you feel, Woof, but never forget (though I know you need no reminder): It’s best to face a painful truth; the consequences of not facing it will be even more painful.
Truth there, Beast.
I do tend to escape into the past, and re-entry is sometimes hard. I’m 64, and was raised in the sticks outside a rural but prosperous ag town of maybe 2,000. It was in many ways actually like living in Mayberry, surrounded by family, shirt-tail cousins, and ‘friends of the family’. Made the mistake of watching the first episode of the Andy Griffith Show last night: I remember that world; those people; that loving humanity that is so very rare these days. I try to recreate it every chance I get, and will never give up. To your point, though, it’s true that some have taken advantage of my nature over the years.