[E. Pluribus Unum]

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[Lazamataz]

The scientific community is abuzz with confusion and mild disgust after a cluster of regurgitated toad toes were discovered drifting perilously close to Earth's orbit. The bizarre find, initially detected by a European Space Agency satellite, has sparked a flurry of investigations into its origins and trajectory.

"Frankly, we're stumped,\" admitted Dr. Anya Sharma, lead astrophysicist at the CERN laboratory. \"We've analyzed the organic matter, and it is, without a doubt, amphibian in nature. More specifically, the digits appear to belong to a common North American toad, *Anaxyrus americanus*. However, their presence in near-Earth orbit defies all logical explanation.\"

The prevailing theories range from the plausible to the outlandish. One suggests a highly unusual meteor shower carrying terrestrial debris, while another posits a highly advanced (and potentially mischievous) alien civilization with a penchant for amphibian cuisine.

"We are ruling nothing out at this stage,\" stated Dr. Sharma. \"While the likelihood of intergalactic toad-toe expulsion is slim, we must remain open to all possibilities.

The regurgitated nature of the toes has further deepened the mystery. Scientists are now investigating the digestive enzymes present, hoping to glean clues about the creature responsible for their…evacuation.

The discovery raises serious questions about the potential for terrestrial contamination of space, and vice versa. Researchers are urging increased monitoring of near-Earth orbit to prevent future incidents of this…unpleasant…nature.

The investigation is ongoing. Stay tuned for updates as this bizarre story develops.\n"