‘Hello doctor, looks like I need an abortion,’ she says.
‘An abortion?’ the doctor replies.
‘Yeah I’ve got one growing inside me. Now, are you going to scramble its brains or just vacuum it out?’
The doctor sighs and says: ‘Mr. Garrison,’ to which she replies: ‘Mrs Garrison!’
The doctor perseveres.
‘Mrs. Garrison, you can’t have an abortion.’
‘Don’t you tell me what I can and can’t do with my body! A woman has a right to choose!’ she says, leaping out of the doctor’s chair and stirrups.
‘No I mean you’re physically unable to have an abortion because you can’t get pregnant,’ the doctor explains.
‘But I missed my period,’ says a confused Garrison.
‘You can’t have periods either. You had a sex change Mr. Garrison, but you don’t have ovaries or a womb. You don’t produce eggs.’
A downtrodden Garrison replies: ‘You mean, I’ll never know what it feels like to have a baby growing inside me and scramble its brains and vacuum it out?’
The doctor confirms: ‘That’s right.’
‘But I paid $5,000 to be a woman. This would mean I’m not really a woman. I’m just a guy with a mutilated penis,’ says Garrison.
The doctor agrees: ‘Basically, yes’ to which Garrison replies: ‘Oh boy, do I feel like a jacka**.’
~~~ South Park from 2005
Exactly what I was thinking of with my #14. Thanks.