Loner stabbed himself to death trying to separate two frozen burgers with a knife

The New York Post ^ | September 18, 2024 | Emily Crane

[Mark17]

I just throw them in the microwave for 30 seconds, and they separate immediately.

[noiseman]

Couldn’t get a diet coke bottle open. The more I failed the more I wanted it. Put a rubber around the top of a lid to open most stubborn tops when you have small hands. Safer than a knife

I’ve always heard that using a rubber was easier than going under the knife, but I didn’t know we were talking about opening jars.

[KittyKares]

The poor guy committed inadvertent hari-kari. I get the creeps just thinking about that knife going in.

[Disambiguator]

Moody Loners with Handguns Kitchen Knives strike again.

[Blue Highway]

I’ve used BIC lighters to open non twist off bottle caps using the lever method. It does cut into the plastic from the ridges and in the back of my mind I’m concerned the lighter will leak at some point especially if I’ve had a few drinks too many. As a lit cigarette to the equation and it could be a trip to the ER

[Enterprise]

No talent on Loner from God.

[roving]

I separate them before I freeze them.

[A strike]

This is what happens when people are not allowed to learn how to use knives..

[Blue Highway]

The left ready to ban all assault knives in 3…2…1

[digger48]

AAA runs in the male side of my family

My father, my brother, and I have all had repairs done. Our sons get checked regularly now for it

I know a couple men who didn’t catch it in time. Bled out in the ER before they could rush him into surgery

[alexander_busek]

Were they at least able to save the burgers?!

Regards,

[Tacrolimus1mg]

Yeah, I’m one of them. I was about 35. Thankfully, damage was minimal. I just drop stuff a lot, trip over my words, and am forgetful.

[Gaffer]

One of the reasons why I use a piece of wax or butcher paper on each side of every patty I freeze.

[daku]

An entire lifetime sidestepping disaster after self made disasters to come to this end. RIP buddy.
I’ll take this as a cautionary tale to use my head, even more than I try to.

[one guy in new jersey]

Blimey! Use a butter knife next time, mate.

[Uversabound]

UK enough said

[Chickensoup]

The doctor asked, “Do you have a microwave?”

.........

Perfect! I laughed out loud.

[maddog55]

No sympathy for a first place Darwin award winner.

[Chickensoup]

Oh you are talking about that kind of rubber?

Unlubricated I presume?

I was thinking rain rubbers.

Personally I use these wonderful circular white rubber waffley mats that sell at the grocer 4 for 3 dollars

[Chickensoup]

Look at it as an opportunity!